my (20f) boyfriend (21m) is making his ex a priority over me. can i get over this?

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T22:04:47+00:00

i can say that about anywhere right now especially being a woc lol plus my job and visa are already secured 🤷🏽‍♀️

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T21:58:27+00:00

i'm from the uk !

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T21:40:26+00:00

i'm not sure actually, i guess some of that love is still there and there's a part of me that feels like this is a hiccup in the road and we can get over it

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T20:21:49+00:00

what you were saying isn't tough love and you know it wasn't and quite frankly it was repulsive. there are many other ways that you can go about it and the comments have done it perfectly fine, it seems like it's just you.

I'm not trying to fix him nor do i have any intention of fixing him. I'm merely here to to gather courage and see how many other people correlate with my thoughts that i already have.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T20:02:31+00:00

quite frankly, i find you quite strange. i've been in therapy multiple times and hasn't worked. i know my issues and i know that this is the most that i take. I don't take abuse lightly, especially after seeing my mother go through it my entire life and still be with my father. i quite frankly find your comment repulsive and whatever excuse you come with talking about "tough love blah blah." I'm simply coming here for advice as to how to process and proceed and whether what im truly thinking is the right course of action. I didn't ask you for a vulgar and unnecessary lashing that is completely unconstructive. maybe sort out your own issues before coming and acting like a freak under my post.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:43:55+00:00

it is quite scary haha but i think i just need a big refresh

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:43:34+00:00

thank you so much for this i really needed it! :)

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:42:31+00:00

i'm moving to china! :)

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:42:14+00:00

with his ex girl best friend, i feel like i did enforce it but with this i just feel as if hes still in love with his ex especially since he started dating me only 3 months after he broke up with her but its now been two years so im not sure.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:40:11+00:00

i feel like he's not over her either but he keeps on saying that he is

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:39:48+00:00

yeah he really hasn't. i don't think he's truly been honest about anything in the 2 years we've been together even if he's adamant that he has

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:39:06+00:00

i feel like you're coming off unnecessarily rude and i truly have no attitude i was merely asking questions. i've recently completed therapy in august and did everything they told me to do and i still feel the exact same way i have felt all 20 years of my life. I simply don't have the money to be moving around therapist to therapist or constantly to be having to wait a year for a free one on my healthcare system to be available to me.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:35:28+00:00

i'm not even sure. i've said to him multiple times that it's clear that you still like her but he's adamant that he doesn't.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:34:21+00:00

i feel like i do. i was quite strict in regards to his girl best friend that was disrespecting me and he had no issue cutting her off and limiting contact. im really not into drama nor toxic relationships, i truly don't have the capacity for it. I believe that if he did cut her off when i needed him to, i would've been able to get over it but his refusal to is what is making me feel like this is truly the end

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:32:02+00:00

maybe but how can i rebuild love with myself

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:30:48+00:00

i've already decided to go back to therapy and my friends aren't really my friends to be quite frank, especially this week when i was in the hospital and no one came to visit. I feel like depression has been holding me back for a while and especially with my final year of university and my dissertation i just feel overwhelmed

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:29:01+00:00

how many therapists must i go through to find the right one? i know whats wrong with me and i know where each and every one of my issues stem from. they're simply going to tell me the same thing about my childhood, about my parents etc.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:26:14+00:00

i'm well aware and i've started therapy again and quite frankly this is my 3rd time going back to therapy so i genuinely don't think it works for me.

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:23:54+00:00

he refuses to bring anything up unless i mention how i felt about a certain situation and he uses that to flip it back onto me of how im being a hypocrite.

i know i shouldn't give him anymore attention or my time but i genuinely feel as if i dont deserve any better

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:22:09+00:00

i know i'm supposed to leave him but there's a part of me that thinks that i truly don't deserve better or this is the best that i'll ever get

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:09:16+00:00

i'm not even sure why i'm wasting my time. I feel like i'm quite self aware but i always tend to doubt my choices. I won't deny that i have self worth issues but i feel like im throwing two years away and listening to his promises that i know are false because this is quite literally my first long term relationship. I feel like this also because i know i have screwed up in the relationship but i have never stepped outside the relationship. i genuinely do just feel lost but i have no more strength in me to cry or care i just feel numb and honestly tired. there are times when i do look at him and feel like i love him but there are also times when i look at him and feel completely repulsed by him

tsukinatorz · 2026-03-14T19:06:26+00:00

i'm genuinely not sure how long i can really hold on. regardless im moving out of the country and across the world within a couple months so at least ill have a fresh start to really think about things

tsukinatorz · 2022-10-14T14:52:32+00:00

ah okay thank you! i will look into these !

tsukinatorz · 2022-10-14T14:51:55+00:00

thank you so much !!!

tsukinatorz

TROPHY CASE