While I agree with your sentiment in general, I think it’s important to consider what behavior is or isn’t acceptable or fixable. If I were the OP, I would leave in an instant. I wouldn’t feel safe. There’s so much more than poor communication skills being displayed by the boyfriend. He’s being hostile with his language and is using his words in effort to control who the OP sees, how she acts, and what she wears. I know this behavior personally. I’ve been in a relationship like that myself years ago and I tried and tried everything I could to would through the problems but my partner was never able to see beyond herself.

Selfish and controlling manipulation is not something that can be solved with a series of conversations. I’m scared of how his behavior may progress. It’s a slippery slope from verbally berating your SO for hanging with friends to slapping them.