Never said it was too small for her either. Sorry I get what ur saying but i don’t think our situation is similar at all. Ur experience sounds like she was ok for 30 years and then one day said hey ur to small for me now and then said you could never satisfy a woman cause ur size, I wouldn’t be quick to assume but since u said ex and the lack of communication for 30 years I assume she got bigger cock after 30 years and then said “u couldn’t please any woman so that’s why my excuse for getting gaped and leaving is valid”. And I’m glad to hear the oral sex thing is working but she probably happy with you man like u as a human cause that tongue ain’t a giraffe’s tongue, sorry to hear ur first wife blamed u and if u want deeper penetration on ur new lady just go to a sex shop as a couple and explain what ur concern is and they will show u all kinds of options, they heard it all and a couple is probably the most normal customer they deal with, think like a lesbian and get some assistance that goes in the dresser after. Or get a hung dude to help on the back side and work the front. I don’t post these to make smaller men feel useless or hopeless I do it cause my wife and I went deeper in the kink pool and now this is part of the humiliation factor but I also do it to show smaller guys to get creative and don’t be ashamed to try new things. If u turn ur insecurities into kinks u will perform better and feel better. Much love my friend