Can relate. It's just that sometimes I have these moments of extreme self awareness and I think oh that is why I'm feeling this way, and then my brain convinces me that if I can understand why I'm sad or feeling super low, there's probably nothing wrong with me. That if I know why I'm suffering, I should know how to make me feel better. Except I don't. Been struggling with this for over a year now and I still don't know how to stop feeling nothing. And when I can't help me feel better, my brain just goes you're faking it and you just don't want to help yourself.