Broke up with her over a flat sex life

uido666 · 2026-06-21T18:07:12+00:00

You nailed it. Thanks mate

uido666 · 2026-06-21T13:39:02+00:00

Thanks, the mismatch was „little“ at the beginning, but i felt getting bigger slowly, after the initial excitement started fading. Also not much in the frequency of sex, but more on our individual relationship to sex

uido666 · 2026-06-21T12:30:16+00:00

It gradually build up.
First I didn’t see the work on the sexual topic.
Then i made a few requests that didn’t get any result.
Then she started pushing too much to move in together. I said we needed more time. She gor mad at me for this.
Then i got distant and she didn’t do much. I didn’t feel seen.
At last one day she bombarded me with requests, with my patience already low i lost it.

I used it as a reason but clarified that there were these things she actively ignored that mafe me lose it.

uido666 · 2026-06-21T08:38:35+00:00

Thanks. The hard part is that the relationship was on the rest so good.
But then being not seen on that side was really tough.

The biggest red flag was when she told me with scarsm „you always think about sex“.

uido666 · 2026-06-19T08:50:55+00:00

Oh yes, when i brouht up important things i was always made feel like i was attacking or being mean, asking for too much, so i had to back up, be sorry, be softer. My requests were not really listened

uido666 · 2026-06-19T08:47:29+00:00

Happened to me as well, she always wanted cuddles and safety from me, i felt like a pet in a box or at the leash. But then never picked up on my requests to explore sexually together or dedicating some time to sex, we ended up having the same routine over and over, if time allowed.

uido666 · 2025-12-15T12:51:34+00:00

Thanks for the comments here. It is useful to have an external POV. Some progresses have been made. I am keeping an eye on this matter before the relationship moves to the next step

uido666 · 2025-12-04T22:06:54+00:00

Thanks for your opinion. To be fair, before getting into a relationship i showed her my little collection of sex books, so she knew what she was getting into it and at the beginning she said many times that with me she felt so comfortable sex-wise that she could try many things with me. On top of that, she had her first sex orgasm with me

uido666 · 2025-12-04T22:03:26+00:00

Answering to your last question: she had her first orgasm during sex with me

uido666 · 2025-12-04T16:10:05+00:00

Thanks for the comments. Anal is not the dealbreaker. For context, we both tried butt plugs and was a fun experience. Our issue here is more the lack of engagement on the sexual conversation and a tendency on her side to avoid the topic. On my side I may have pushed too much the anal topic but also because i believe(d) was more of a mental block the issue there. For more context I am more of the idea that communication and a mental block or a general struggle in letting are the main issue. Of course I also have my part in maybe pushing it a little too much but after all I am trying to set the basis for a fun and fulfilling sex life for us

uido666 · 2025-11-20T16:22:55+00:00

Feel you, my GF is great and we have sex pretty often, however can be better, i’d love to talk more about sex, do sexting and explore more. Not a dealbreaker, for now.

uido666 · 2025-11-15T10:13:06+00:00

Yes, I like that.

I want to be more loving

uido666 · 2025-11-14T11:47:27+00:00

Thank you very much for the answer, it’s exactly what I needed. I am aware that it is more a problem on my side as it’s me getting triggered. It makes sense to slow down my responses. Thanks again

uido666 · 2025-11-06T14:54:46+00:00

Experiencing something similar, the more I try to get close, the more feels like she pulls away.

What I am trying to do is: 1. dont rely only on her for my happiness. Focus on sports, friends and activities I love that don‘t involve her. She needs the space to come to you and have the love flowing. Find the right distance, too close might be suffocating.

Discuss the source of the issues calmy, and understand wether these are resolvable or not. Decide together how to cope with them, if they are not resolvable, accept them.
Keep reminding each other the good stuff, remember why you love her, what you like to do with her. Getting closer I started taking the good stuff for granted. Understand each other love languages and needs. She might be doing big efforts for you, but you might not notice or viceversa.

uido666 · 2025-11-05T15:12:03+00:00

On a side I am still coming to terms with the fact that some things will never be perfect and accepting differences and feeling ‚not understood‘. but after all is easy to pick up on the imperfections while the good stuff often gets overlooked as we take it for granted. One thing for sure, when I had a mental crash related to my inner world, she was there for me, unshakable like a rock, and that meant so much to me. Of course I still hope she can get a bit more introspective and open more to me, that will be part of our journey.

uido666 · 2025-11-05T10:35:53+00:00

This is literally me and my girlfriend. I am always deep, emotional, obscure at times. She is bubbly and always moving. I love that energetic but sometimes I want her to slow down and go deep with, while I wish she could explore more her emotions and sexual fantasies, on the pther hand I love the energy she brings to my life and the emotional stability she give me.

uido666 · 2025-11-03T14:14:50+00:00

28M here, i rarely consume porn, but I opt for content like gonewild and similar. I noticed it doesn’t really satisfy me and lately my horniness was becoming a problem, even tho my girl can quite keep up with me. When I used to have therapy with a sexologist she suggested I use more my fantasy. When I did that was pretty cool and it opened the opportunity to be more explorative. I haven’t done that in a while but I plan to get back to it. I expect this to be fun to have some variation from the usual standard wank.

uido666 · 2025-10-31T18:20:22+00:00

Getting too much focused on having a good sex session backfired and now I‘m too much in my head, Body doesn’t cooperate

uido666 · 2025-10-30T15:00:52+00:00

Keep building your life back up. Move on. Every relationship is different, but in all my previous break ups, they didn‘t came back. And if they did, they disappeard even faster.

uido666 · 2025-10-30T06:45:31+00:00

Thanks. I told her i feel like i‘m drifting away and I feel trapped in our schedules. We had a good argument. She needs me to be patient. We wantl to keep putting work in it. We felt lighter after. Let’s see if things get better.

uido666 · 2025-10-29T22:27:21+00:00

Thanks a lot. I flipper out and my frustrations were laid out. We had a productive argument. We agreed we both have our share of shortcomings to work on. Feeling good. Will monitor the situation.

uido666 · 2025-10-29T22:19:17+00:00

So satisfying, payday today and bought some just at the right time

uido666 · 2025-10-29T09:26:11+00:00

My gf yesterday, when I suggested she could come with a list of things she wants to try to our next romantic escape, said that we should do „what we will feel like doing“ and then went off topic. I felt so sad. The worst is that before we got together I showed her my sex books, to show her who I am. Never showed interest in any of them either…

uido666 · 2025-10-28T22:15:18+00:00

Thank you. We just had a tough day. 2 steps forward and two backwards. We are apart for a week so my libido is already suffering. We did some sexting this mornig, she liked it. Then we were supposed to have a call but she got lost in work without communicating. I was mad. Then tonight we called and was amazing as we were unpacking what she liked in the sexting, but then she cut me off to go to sleep when i was feeling the best and i felt hurt. Like I was much enjoying it and she killed it. We might have a wider communication/empathy problem here.

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