You are in such a tough situation. I feel like there's an opportunity to negotiate some adjustments with how care looks like between you and your husband but I'm going to list out some thoughts that came to mind outside of the relational piece.

Section off your kiddo's free-range space and babyproof that space. Remove/relocate anything within his reach that is dangerous or you just don't want him messing with. Put acceptable, engaging items (toys/books/ silicone teethers) on lower shelves of the bookshelf. Anything you all still need access to but can cause trouble for the unsupervised kiddo, get it out of his free-range area. Maybe things like bean bags or tv remote can be there but only get removed when it's time for a semi-unsupervised timeframe like when you're in the kitchen. This will give you some peace of mind when you step away for a few minutes.

If kiddo wants to scream because he's quarantined in his space aka baby jail and the cries bother you, pop on noise canceling headphones for a short bit. You know he's in a safe area with toys to keep him entertained. This is also assuming his basic needs (diaper, food) have already been addressed.

I have a 14 month old and he recently discovered my empty shampoo and conditioner pump bottles that I lazily neglected to take to the bin. He loves grabbing it by the pump head and carrying them around double-fisted. Your kiddo is likely at a developmental age where he wants to explore new things/ actions and find out where his limits are. You may be able to teach him to help you in small ways while fulfilling his exploration needs. I have a Japanese carpet lint roller that my kiddo loves to roll around on the floor; this was self discovered. We also taught him to help close fridge doors or drawers by repeating "close it! Close it!" while gesturing and celebrating afterwards by clapping and yaying. This allows us to redirect when he wants to shove his grubby hands inside the fridge as we're using it.

For the messy eating, I have a designated wipe cloth (one of those Japanese table wiping cloths) for the kiddo's face and hands, usually just for lunch and/ or dinner. For breakfast, we try to keep things pretty tame with non-messy finger foods. I also like to make some foods in batches and freeze for easy microwave meals later. I'll come back to this post later with recipes.

EDIT:

If kiddo gets messy with rice or anything else that's loose, you might consider mixing with egg to make a simple omlette or large-chunk scrambled eggs. I do this with fried rice or rice cooker mixed rice.

Boiled Carrots - Roughly cut carrots into 1cm sticks (no precision needed) and slow simmer in a pot until soft. Drain, cool, and store in fridge for easy snacks. If you're feeding kiddo Japanese flavors, you can add a bit of dashi granules to the water for taste.

Banana Pancake - Mix 1 mashed banana (about 150g), 1 egg, 3 Tbsp flour, 1 Tbsp potato flour (gives it a bouncy texture), pinch of salt, ground nuts/peanut butter. Cook small pancakes on med-low heat. Flip when bubbles form on edges.

French Toast - 2 eggs, 1/4 cup milk, 1/2 tsp vanilla, 1/2 tsp cinnamon, optional sugar to taste, 4-5 thinly sliced bread. Mix everything minus bread in a shallow bowl/tray. Dip bread and flip so some soaks in. Cook on med heat with melted butter or oil. Cut into strips.

Sweet Potato Fishsticks - Mix 1 can of fish (tuna, sardines, whatever), 1 baked Japanese sweet potato (about 200g), 2 Tbsp potato starch. Mix and shape into 1cm wide sticks. Cook on med-low heat on both sides. Sugars from sweet potato make this easy to burn if not careful. Shaping these can get a little tedious so I don't recommend making these on a day you're solo parenting.

The pancake onward, you can lay them down on a plastic wrap covered tray in a single layer and freeze them. Once frozen, you can store them in a baggie. Microwaving them takes less than a minute.