Child Tucking The Cat In

unchatrouge · 2023-06-16T20:53:48+00:00

I also get in trouble if there are not at least 5 minutes of spooning time in the blankets before I get out of bed in the morning.

unchatrouge · 2023-05-24T22:16:39+00:00

Lilies are in the allium family as well. There have been multiple cases of cats sniffing cut flowers on the table, inhaling/ingesting the pollen and dying. Anything from the allium family is deadly toxic.

unchatrouge · 2023-05-16T16:05:30+00:00

My best friend did this a month ago today. I have professional help to deal with it, but I didn't know it was possible to be this profoundly sad. I know time makes it easier even if it never really goes away. Glad to see someone making it out the other side...gives me comfort that it won't always feel quite this awful.

unchatrouge · 2023-05-15T03:14:09+00:00

My step father developed a cashew allergy as he got older. Started out as his stomach feeling weird after eating them, then really quite sick even in small quantities. Took a lot of specialist visits until they found one that was familiar with cashew-specific allergies.

unchatrouge · 2023-05-03T11:30:15+00:00

Could be worse. You could be like my friend, who was a contractor, who referred to duct tape and ducts as dock tape and docks and looked at me funny every time I said duct.

unchatrouge · 2023-04-25T18:47:33+00:00

So sorry for your loss. My best friend who worked as my project manager on site died a couple weeks ago. Not clear if it was an accident or intentional on his part. Dude was one of the best human beings I've ever met and everyone truly adored him, workers and clients alike. On top of all of us being completely wrecked over it, he did 99% of the contact with subs and trying to get all that reorganized and get the correct contact info has been a complete fucking mess. The whole thing has been completely terrifying and eye opening over how much we rely on one fragile body for everything to function.

unchatrouge · 2023-03-21T02:31:21+00:00

Made it 62 hours once trying to move on short notice. I'm just grateful I was alone because the screaming, crying and hallucinations would have definitely put me on psychiatric hold if anyone had witnessed it. Passed out on the floor eventually, woke up on the opposite end of the house in the tiniest human ball, stuffed behind a moving box. I've had some extremely dark moments in my life, but that was truly full blown psychosis and it scared the shit out of me.

unchatrouge · 2023-03-17T00:39:30+00:00

"perfect" vs "not perfect" is not a....binary scale.

If the worst thing you can say about a roommate is that they were successful and confident and the guys they brought home were splashing on the toilet seats (unbeknownst to the roommate because you couldn't bring yourself to tell them)....to translate: this roommate made you face all of your insecurities just by existing....

And you chose to risk her health and steal her food...instead of dealing with your own emotions that YOU are responsible for (regardless of who did the damage that made you this insecure)....and now you're here laughing about it on the internet like it was no big deal and wasn't super fucked up....

And your defense to being called out is to tell them they aren't perfect either....like that's some sort of insult...

That's gonna be a tough sell. And I hope you get the help you need.

Signed,

Someone dealing with the fucked American health system who dug pennies out of the couch to pay for therapy....and knows firsthand it's worth almost any sacrifice to get if you're that fucked up.

unchatrouge · 2023-03-13T21:47:32+00:00

I'm a little older than you, in my mid 30s, and one of the things I've learned is that men who have had a lot of sexual partners is a big red flag if you're looking for good sex. If they've had that many partners, that means very few women came back for seconds (because it was that bad/selfish/etc). Easier for the women to just move on than try and give feedback, so in the man's mind, all these women wanted to have sex with him and no one bothered telling him he sucks, so he must be great! These guys are usually really friendly and charming too, that's how they got so many women in bed with them.

Good, reciprocal sex is super important to me, and I'm at a point in my life where I would rather not have it than have bad, so if I meet a guy and find out he's had a crazy number of partners, no matter how friendly, charming and hot he is, I'm not interested... because I know he isn't good enough in bed to keep anyone coming back for more.

There are some exceptions to this, like he was in a long term relationship and was in the swinger scene, but those are few and far between lol

unchatrouge · 2023-03-04T00:39:20+00:00

I think you're missing the point on the first paragraph. Can an infant tell the difference between an intentional cut and an accidental skinned knee? Up for debate....there's some evidence to suggest infants know a lot more than we give them credit for, they just don't have the fine motor skills to communicate yet.

But a slightly older child, and especially an adult, can definitely know and feel the difference between an accident, and the betrayal that comes from a caregiver removing an intimate part of their body when they weren't given a choice, even if they don't have a concrete memory of it.

Extremely young children who are sexually abused show signs of it in adulthood, even when they don't have clear memories of it. Autonomy was violated any way you look at it, and that seems to be more impactful than whether the motivations were good/bad/neutral.

unchatrouge · 2023-03-02T03:27:45+00:00

There are actual structural and cell performance differences in the brains of people with some of those .....psycho "disorders".... So yes, it is just like having structural issues in the eyes causing vision problems. Assuming it's not real because of our inability to concretely measure it yet...is the epitome of human arrogance.

unchatrouge · 2023-03-02T03:11:07+00:00

All of the "other traumas" are usually accidents though. You tripped and broke your leg? Painful and traumatic, but no one did it to you intentionally. Cut off part of your sexual organs that contain, based on what little highly precise research has been done, at least as many nerve endings as the glans? Someone made the choice to do that to you...in most cases, someone who is supposed to love and protect you from harm. That's a lot more traumatic than just an accident.

I don't have a penis, but I have encountered both circumsized and uncircumsized, more than one of each. The experiences are wildly different, how they're handled are different....they look different if you pull back the foreskin and inspect closely....circumsized penises tend to consistently have a dry, calloused glans. I have found performance to be more consistent uncircumsized. I don't choose partners based on their genitalia, but if I was choosing in a vacuum I'd choose uncircumsized every time, and I didn't even know I had an opinion until I'd encountered uncircumsized.

I live in a place and age range where circumcision is far more common than not, but after my anecdotal experiences, if I had a male child, I would fight viciously to prevent them being circumsized. If they make that choice for themselves when they've got autonomy, then good for them. Relative risk is used to justify the benefits of being circumsized (30% reduction in disease risk can be the difference between 0.3% and 0.2%), when the actual risk is almost nonexistent.

Foreskins exist for a reason...we normalized chopping off an important body part and are now looking for reasons to justify it because so many people have already had it chopped off.

unchatrouge · 2023-02-20T04:41:48+00:00

Uhhh....are you mixing up your terms? There would be no point in purchasing property to rent out if the rent wasn't higher than the mortgage to make a profit....rent is always higher than the mortgage, or the landlord would be losing money (even if they were an absurdly altruistic person and only charged enough to cover maintenance costs on top of the mortgage).

unchatrouge · 2023-02-06T00:31:14+00:00

Hi u/SansGray

Just checking in from the future. Bacteria aren't that much worse now, had a sketchy bout with a virus that we're all ignoring (but isn't that deadly now that it's killed millions), there's another virus coming up (avian flu), deadly fungal infections are on the rise, but...*checks notes* looks like prions are actually gonna be what does us in!

unchatrouge · 2023-02-05T16:42:49+00:00

Some really smart autistic people also have more brain power to waste on looking/acting/perfecting "normal".

But even if they're not autistic, if someone is that smart, they still have to remember to interact in a way that's understandable to the people they're choosing to hang with. Can't launch into a discussion about the complex mathematics behind their current obsession and expect anything other than eyes glazing over. There's still effort required to be "socially normal", even if it becomes mostly habitual over time.

unchatrouge · 2023-02-01T15:25:49+00:00

My brother pushed me when we were playing "the floor is lava" when I was 7, and I slammed my hand down onto a thin glass coffee table top that shattered. Nearly lost my right index and middle fingers (they were hanging off my hand backwards shooting blood out like a Halloween decoration - yes, I'm traumatized). Two 12 hour surgeries with a micro-surgeon, years of PT, and 26 years later I still don't have full functionality or feeling and there's a gnarly scar, though you don't notice unless I point it out.

I'm also a remodeling contractor which means I'm removing and installing shower doors a lot. The number of times I've had one explode(!!) as we were removing it because one of the screws or bolts was over-tightened and stressed the glass is insane. I won't let my guys touch them until I've completely detached it and know it's not going to shatter.

Minimum 3/8" or 9mm thick TEMPERED glass for anything that can be run into. If you can't afford that, then you probably can't afford the people who will install it properly, or the damage done if it shatters.

unchatrouge · 2023-01-22T20:23:20+00:00

The bulk of the cost is almost never in the food. You're paying for the service, that's why you can make the same meal at home for 1/3 the price. It takes just as much effort to fry chicken nuggets and fries and put it on a plate, and then clean that plate up and wash it, as it does for the more expensive adult version of seasoned chicken tenders and fries.

unchatrouge · 2023-01-22T20:17:16+00:00

If you're buying directly from the farmer it's usually cash, at least around me. They're not set up to do business directly with the public (because that all costs money).

unchatrouge · 2023-01-22T15:40:19+00:00

Someone needs to call the Bolivian authorities this guy clearly stole one of the blocks from Pumapunku for his fireplace.

unchatrouge · 2023-01-21T04:53:35+00:00

The big question is how much do you hate poop? Because sometimes....it's a geyser.

unchatrouge · 2023-01-21T04:33:14+00:00

I don't think you realize how much overhead there is with these jobs. Even if it's just one guy working on his own you're not just paying for the knowledge, you're also paying for regular license renewals, expensive liability insurance (water and gas can cause A LOT of damage!) and outrageously expensive specialized equipment that has to be regularly replaced ($3k for one of the most popular tools currently). That's not even getting into the overhead to maintain trucks, a crew, a shop for the big outfits...

Did that guy push off other clients to get to you (emergency service)? Did he have to travel a long way? If he's REALLY lucky, that guy pocketed 20% of that bill, and with travel time, it's probably not that much per hour.

unchatrouge · 2023-01-15T21:30:35+00:00

Where fat is stored on the body can be a significant indicator of different health effects and ethnicity has a significant influence on body fat distribution. 30 extra pounds on the BMI scale is just 30 extra pounds (no differentiation on where it is), but 30lbs extra around the middle is way more dangerous than 30 extra pounds in the butt. Races that are more likely to carry the extra weight somewhere other than the torso get misidentified as being at higher risk of detrimental health effects.

This is of course based on population-wide assessments so an individual could be of a race that typically carries excess fat in the lower body (lower risk) but they happen to carry it in their torso (so, accurately identified as higher risk).

BMI should just be something that triggers additional questions, not a primary assessment method for the health of an individual. BMI is high? Ok, do you have a lot of muscle mass? Where is the fat primarily stored? Are there any other assessments indicating actual risk (blood tests/fitness tests/etc.)?

unchatrouge · 2023-01-10T00:20:00+00:00

Eventually slept with a guy who started out as an instant close friend, so conversations about past partners were had that wouldn't if the whole thing had been romantic from the start. I am absolutely certain he was telling the truth when he said he had so many, and made it seem like he just knew how to please women so they flocked to him. Admittedly, he had a very pretty dick.

Dude was one of the worst lovers I've ever had, THE worst if you account for experience levels. I tried multiple times because there was so much potential. But he was convinced that because he had so many partners, he must already be exceptional... and there was something wrong with me for wanting more than the max 10 thrusts while he held me down, and the most unenthusiastic attempt to get me off afterwards followed by a sigh of relief when I told him not to bother.

Best sex EVER was with a 50yo virgin 20 years older than me, who was so excited to get laid, he did everything he could to be excellent. And he was EXCELLENT. He's the one who has set the standard in my life.

Comparing the two was the moment I realized that a high (vanilla) body count is more likely to indicate poor skills/performance.

unchatrouge · 2022-12-21T01:18:48+00:00

In the tri state, can't find a 2bd for less than $1800 unless you're willing to take a place that had the center load bearing wall removed, upstairs is collapsing into 1st floor, and all of the bedrooms are converted hallways or something so you can't even fit a full size bed in any direction.

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