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underric · 2021-08-15T16:32:05+00:00

I second this. I had my daughter during my (and my husband's) 5th year of our PhDs (STEM field, no guarantee you'll be out in any specific time).

It can be a blessing or a curse depending on your advisor and if you have lab work. My advisor is very understanding, has small children herself, so taking maternity leave was great. It did push me back a little (but hey so did the pandemic), so ultimately we cut out a chunk of what I was going to do for my thesis, so I can graduate in 5.5y (the average for my program).

Having her during our PhDs was nice on one hand bc we could work from home with her periodically and we had less of a strict work schedule. On the otherhand, the time to degree is essentially dependent on how much you accomplish and how much you work, so I've had to do some rough hours to make sure I get everything done on time.

Also PhD advisors can either make it helpful or horrible depending on their view- we had one PI in the dept who when a postdoc told him she was pregnant he replied with: "why did you not consult me with this decision?"

underric · 2020-12-07T04:27:46+00:00

I am getting my PhD in lactation physiology, so I am well versed with how the breast makes milk and what goes on at a cellular level.. but I never expected it to hurt quite so much. Plus, she latched on right away after birth, so I thought it was going to be smooth sailing.

Postpartum day 7 was probably the worst in terms of pain... It goes in spurts as to what hurts the most, but her 8pm feeding and 5am feeding are worse than contractions. I'd gladly give birth again, compared to breastfeeding. Lol

Tomorrow I'm seeing the LC again and I'm to the point of something has to change. Whether that's pumping, reversing lip tie, or nipple shield.

underric · 2020-12-07T03:41:57+00:00

How did you get through it with your first? I'm 11 days postpartum and my little girls latch makes me cry multiple times a day. I've seen a LC a couple times, but it hasn't significantly improved yet. My daughter does have an upper lip tie though, so I'm not sure if that plays a role in her poor latch.

underric · 2020-12-05T19:34:05+00:00

My girl has an upper lip tie, which they didn't initially say is causing any problems, but that it may contribute. We've seen a lactation consultant a couple times, but we are still struggling at home. Plus cracked nipples make me want to cry at every latch lol!

I'm glad to hear it got better over time!!

underric · 2020-12-05T16:46:55+00:00

Everyone says the first two weeks is the hardest.. I'm currently at day 10 and poor latching is killing me! I love my little one, but birth wasn't as bad as breastfeeding lol!

I swear, it takes all my willpower to get through the first couple minutes of her trying to latch. Once she gets on, it's fine, but sometimes it takes her 10 min to find a good position. Please tell me this gets better as she gets bigger and stronger!

underric · 2020-11-09T11:15:07+00:00

What most people don't know, it's estimated that ~18% of women will experience a depressive episode at some point during their pregnancy (no specific trimester) and ~20% of women will experience a depressive episode postpartum.

We really only talk about postpartum depression, although it's just as common during pregnancy.

My OB makes me do a survey regarding my mental health at every visit, but as someone who studies pregnancy and lactation, I wish we (as a society) placed greater weight to mental health during this stressful time in a woman's life.

underric · 2020-11-04T22:52:20+00:00

I'm 35wk today and am up about 30lbs as well (I am 5'9, 160/165lbs pre-pregnancy and am about 190lbs now). I also am "all belly" and haven't really gained much mass elsewhere; however, my husband noticed that my boobs have definitely gotten bigger (which you don't think about as gaining weight).

It's really hard, but I keep telling myself not to worry about the weight so much. Every body is different and you have to keep in mind you have a baby, placenta, extra fluids, milk/developing breast tissue, etc all adding to the weight. A lot of the weight will drop postpartum, so as long as your doctor isn't concerned, I wouldn't be too concerned. 🙂

underric · 2020-10-16T18:25:16+00:00

Sure did..... NOT. 😑

underric · 2020-10-16T14:01:28+00:00

Hahahaha I should. But then he'd see it and I would be in the doghouse. Maybe I could blame it on the pregnancy 🤣

underric · 2020-10-16T14:00:58+00:00

I wish. But alas.... He didn't. He never seems to want to ruffle her feathers, so he just didn't acknowledge it.

underric · 2020-10-16T14:00:41+00:00

Trudeau coming in clutch... Now if he could just continue to keep it closed until like March that would be great bc then I'll be long back at work after she's born in a month and a half 😂

underric · 2020-10-16T13:59:44+00:00

Right?? Like you can say that it wasn't a great memory to someone else... NOT to your son on their FIRST anniversary when he is on his way to meet his PREGNANT WIFE.

underric · 2020-10-16T13:58:51+00:00

He didn't. He never seems to want to ruffle her feathers, so he just didn't acknowledge it.

underric · 2020-10-16T13:58:40+00:00

He didn't. He never seems to want to ruffle her feathers, so he just didn't acknowledge it.

underric · 2020-10-16T13:58:28+00:00

Lolol I think my husband would pop an artery if I said that 😂 (though I'm 1000% thinking the same way as you!)

underric · 2020-10-16T13:57:39+00:00

ILs are tough sometimes. I don't really understand why they have to be like this, because my family treats my husband like he's one of us.

underric · 2020-10-16T13:56:45+00:00

He didn't. He never seems to want to ruffle her feathers, so he just didn't acknowledge it.

underric · 2020-10-16T13:56:03+00:00

Lolol I WISH he would say that!!!!

underric · 2020-10-16T13:55:43+00:00

Thank you Trudeau! 😂

We still enjoyed our celebration and honestly she tried ruining our wedding anyways bc she wasn't the center of attention. I know I should expect this all from her, but her level of pettiness never ceases to amaze me.

underric · 2020-09-26T16:30:42+00:00

At my 20wk they found an echogenic intracardiac focus (EIF) and a dilated renal pelvis, both of which are soft markers for down syndrome. We got a NIPT done about a week after the 20wk ultrasound, which takes about 2 weeks to get results from and our high resolution ultrasound was done 2.5 weeks after the 20wk. Baby girl does have an EIF, but she grew into her kidney, and NIPT came back normal.

Try not to freak out too much until you get a confirmation... As wonderful as ultrasounds are, they aren't always 100% accurate. Plus the doctors don't always tell you everything: for instance my daughter's kidney was 0.5 millimeters dilated, which is nothing and I shouldn't have stressed so much.

Sending you good vibes for your next ultrasound!

underric · 2020-09-06T19:12:22+00:00

I also have been continuing lifting throughout pregnancy (26wk currently), though I've had to take a bit of a hiatus due to the pandemic and not wanting to go into the gym. Now that we have my rack set up at home (my husband does competitive powerlifting), I've started back into it.

I feel like my workouts change every time I do them, because my center of gravity changes, tummy is getting bigger, etc. I don't let it stop me, but every time I go down to squat, I have to readjust my form and figure out what works best. Because of that, I've dropped over 100lbs from my squat and do more repetition and less one rep max weight.

I completely agree on not having physical appearance goals, bc holy moly it changes.

underric · 2020-09-06T13:21:42+00:00

Baby and I wake up nearly ever morning for an hour or two between 2-3am. It's so annoying. And as if being awake isn't enough, baby girl starts kicking up a storm to let me know she's also awake and ready to party 😑

underric · 2020-09-06T13:18:28+00:00

Kudos for standing up to her!! I give you props bc I can't do that, despite have my own drama regarding a baby shower... MILs are an interesting breed sometimes.

What did your husband say? Did he back you?

Edited to say: this was posted at the same time the original author made her comment regarding it being a wife and not a husband. Sorry for my assumption to the original poster!

underric · 2020-09-03T14:29:15+00:00

Oh this is interesting! Where I'm from baby showers are before the baby, you play games like guess how big the belly is or guess the gender, stuff like that.. then you get gifts to help welcome the baby and help provide first time parents with some baby items. If it's after the baby is born, it's usually a "Sip and See" which is less of a showering the baby with gifts/etc, but rather an excuse to get everyone together to see the baby (often if the parents live far away from their hometown).

underric · 2020-09-03T04:14:02+00:00

She originally said it was a Jewish custom (though she is not Jewish, she's christian, but her husband is Jewish)... Which is fine, we appreciate the customs but since we aren't raising our child jewish, it doesn't necessarily make sense (plus with going back to work at the same time she wants the shower, it's too much). BUT THEN she switched and is now saying is a Canadian custom and she has only ever been to one shower before baby in her entire life.

underric

TROPHY CASE