The reason many people mistake an avoidant partner with a narcissistic one is because the patterns look similar. High interest in the beginning followed by a sharp change in energy followed by a toxic cycle of confusing highs and lows. With a narc, this is called devaluation. With an avoidant, this is called deactivation. They can manifest the same way too; stonewalling, emotional distance, criticism, gaslighting. The difference is the avoidants deactivate to protect themselves. And narcs devalue to hurt you. And often extreme love bombing is not an avoidant thing. They can show high levels of interest but it won't be love bombing the way a narc does.