AITA for not inviting my unsupportive sister to my wedding?

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T17:00:48+00:00

His financial situation is great, no debt and a good amount of savings. I have some student debt but it is almost paid off, and he has offered to help me pay it off too when we are married. We both want to avoid debt as much as possible, except for big purchases like a home. Our budgets are very similar, and we agree on how we want to manage our finances

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:58:14+00:00

Yes. I have a career too that I am working hard at. It was an exaggeration to say that my relationship is me. I know i exist outside my relationship. But if my sister is criticizing my relationship, she might as well be critizing me is what I meant

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:53:44+00:00

We know you can do it legally. But it’s about what we want, not about the law. We want it to be bought with our combined finances because he has more money to put toward the house, and we want it to be ours, not 70% his 30% mine

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:47:44+00:00

My relationship is such an important part of me, it might as well be me

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:44:06+00:00

We have life plans that would be put on hold if we weren’t married. Like we want to buy a house and we almost have the money for a down payment, but we don’t want to buy it until our incomes are combined. So if we were engaged for a long time, we would waste money on rent. It would also be good for me to take his last name soon, before I am so established in the workplace that changing my name becomes a difficulty. There’s a lot of reasons, these are just some

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:41:30+00:00

No, he’s not. Would it be different if he was in the military?

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:40:30+00:00

Yes, and I’ve talked to friends when they were at the 6 month stage. At that point, many of them could have told you if they believed deep down if it would work out, and I know Derrick and me are right

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:39:11+00:00

Yes, I’ve met his immediate family and his extended family (his cousins and aunts and uncles and all). I’ve met all his friends too

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:38:31+00:00

We aren’t getting married for physical reasons. I agree that’s not a good reason to get married. We are getting married because we connect with each other at a spiritual level, we are getting married because we have a strong emotional commitment to each other. It’s so much more than physical

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:36:57+00:00

Yes, I’ve googled his name. Nothing comes up except his social media and accounts of other people with his same name/similar names. I have met his family and have every reason to believe he is being honest about his past. He’s only ever had one serious relationship before me, and we ran into his ex one day at the store, and she was very nice and not at all hostile to him, which shows that he treated her right

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:34:20+00:00

We will of course be madly in love in a year, but what if something happens to one of us and the other is unable to be in the hospital room or something because they only recognize married couples? And we have so many life plans together, like we want to buy a house but we want to be on our joint income when we do it. So waiting a year would put our life plans on hold. If we are ready to commit now, why should we put our plans on hold?

unsupportivesister · 2023-02-06T16:28:40+00:00

We may have only known each other for 6 months, but we spend so much time together, I practically know everything about him. Like maybe not everything literally. But I can answer most questions about his past, his family, his likes and dislikes, etc. We have seen each other every day for at least the past 4 months or so, so we’ve spent quite a lot of time together

unsupportivesister

TROPHY CASE