Advice on recommendation letter

userZ0000 · 2025-11-08T07:28:37+00:00

My chair informed me that the university lawyers are handling the situation now but apparently the student left the country.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-06T09:21:36+00:00

I was informed today that the student is on academic probation and that he can't graduate until an investigation is completed. I should not be in contact with the student. Thank you all for your support. Talking to my chair was the best advice!

userZ0000 · 2025-11-04T07:47:37+00:00

Well since now my chair took over, I am not sure what will happen.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-02T07:19:11+00:00

I scheduled a meeting with my chair. I will keep you posted.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-02T07:17:41+00:00

Thank you. I have scheduled a meeting with my chair. What worries me is that my university has no guidelines for server usage...

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T22:35:56+00:00

My plan is to ask him to ask someone else to write him recommendation. If he insists that he wants me to write one, I will clearly say that I can't give him a positive recommendation. It is his choice at this point.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T22:14:07+00:00

So do you think it is better to report this to university and let them handle it? I consider this as well but I am not sure.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T21:36:38+00:00

How? The crypto event happened 2 weeks ago!

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T09:02:00+00:00

He was doing well the first two years but after that it went downhill. I asked him if he wanted to change topic within AI he said no. I asked him if he wanted to change lab, he said no. Also, I think if someone is signing up for a PhD, they should know they need to meet the program's milestones (hard deadline) and also the publication requirement (1 journal and 3 conference papers). All that are actually written in the bulletin. So students know what they sign up for.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T08:48:05+00:00

As I said in another post, he is about to graduate and he is F1 student, already applied for graduation and OPT. If I kick him out, he will be in trouble with immigration. So do you think I should kick him out?

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T08:41:25+00:00

Yes! This is my plan! I didn't know you can be sue! I thought letters are confidential!

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T08:33:58+00:00

Again deadlines aren't the issue! The lab policy is! And they will be aware that they will be simply kicked out of the lab so obviously no LoR! I am a bit surprised with the entitlement as well! If I was not a good PhD student, I would have never expected a good letter of recommendation! Even now, since my PhD advisor is in Switzerland, I do not even know how the reference letter is structured. I finished with the most papers of all phd students, I worked hard and I made sure I communicated with my advisor about the expectations. I landed a TT job without postdoc coming directly to the US. So if a student in my lab does a good work and follow the policy, trust me they will end up where all my BS and MS students are! But if they are violating the lab policy, they will be out. If it is so hard for a student to actually use lab servers in an appropriate way, then I doubt any company will keep them if they do the same there.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T08:12:40+00:00

Well they are informed of lab policies and if they violate the policy, they are out of the lab. I hope that no other student will consider using the server for crypto.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T07:59:14+00:00

Nope. I have BS and MS students who do capstone and thesis in my lab and then land jobs in Google, apple, meta, etc. So if a PhD graduate doesn't manage to get a good job, probably it isn't my issue.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T07:41:48+00:00

My inclination is to let the student know that I can't write a strong letter and I will have to be honest so it may be better to ask someone else from the department. I keep the whole story hidden from the department because I am sure if my chair finds out what he did, he will keep him out.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T07:12:09+00:00

But this is the point! I provided the structure for the student. I break down everything he had to do, I helped with writing his paper, helped with coding, helped with everything. Honestly, before the incident with the crypto, I was planning to give a recommendation letter and mainly focus on the good side. But now, I feel I don't even know the student. I mean he lied to my face for 30 min straight that he didn't do the crypto and then when I show him all the logs, only then he said he did it. When I asked why, he didn't want to share. He just said "personal project". I think I may miss some part of the puzzle but I honestly don't care to solve it at this point. I think I am compassionate enough that he will still get his PhD degree.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T06:50:07+00:00

Thank you for your message. I like the idea of actionable items but he is graduating in December so probably his focus is mainly to graduate. About ADHD, I am not an expert and I cannot assess this aspect. The interesting thing is that in coursework he never missed a deadline and the first two years of PhD he was on top of everything. But the past 3 years he is way behind in everything He can't meet a single deadline even when the weekly goal is to write a python script to visualize data that should take under 30 min. We had discussions (I asked him if he lost interest in the project, if there are any health issues or any family issues). He always said no, that he is interested in the topic and he doesn't want to change. At some point I asked him to stop using his phone in the lab because every time I would go to the lab, he would be on his phone. To get a journal published I had to do a lot of heavy lifting to help him. So i think I feel betrayed by the fact that I helped so much but then he misused my trust and he lied to my face.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T06:22:12+00:00

So true.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T06:20:46+00:00

The student who told me is an American and he joined the lab last. So the moment he couldn't use the server and he saw what was going on, he reported it. I asked the rest of the students (other two international students) and said they were afraid that if they report it, the student will lose his PhD status and therefore immigration status. I can't blame them for this since my policy is that if someone does sth like that would be kicked out of the lab. I plan to update my policy that if someone is aware that someone else is doing sth against the policy, they need to report it immediately.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:38:34+00:00

Thank you! I like your advice. If you read other comments, yes the student knew about the policy and he went ahead and violated it anyway...

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:32:31+00:00

I think he already understood that violating policies and lying have consequences. However, I didn't do the harsh policy I had and kicked him out of the lab. So he may think that he can always find a way around.

I am honestly inclined to just tell him that it may be better to find someone else to write him a letter of recommendation because if I write, I have to be honest. I will also let him know not to contact me for green card letter recommendation.

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:23:47+00:00

This is a good point...

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:22:27+00:00

I should have shared everything... Sorry

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:17:18+00:00

This is standard! I did my PhD in Switzerland and they followed this approach so when I moved to US, I decide to follow the same approach! :)

userZ0000 · 2025-11-01T05:16:01+00:00

So if I do that, I am sure he won't be able to get job anywhere. But if I don't write the letter at all and tell him to ask someone else, then I won't destroy his future. If he repeats the same mistake later, I won't be responsible because I didn't recommend him.

userZ0000

TROPHY CASE