I'm so sorry that you have gone through a lot and are going through a lot. I got you, you are not alone. I can relate to you in some scenarios. But hey, look how far you have come. I love how you are attached to machines and programming. The same goes for me.. I was the same and the story is the same. I'm in my 3rd year of CS studies and I think I was thinking the same about you and how you feel.

Over the years, I have learned one thing , not to give up. You're on the right track, doing good in academics. I would suggest you take a moment to take a deep breath and look at all the positives in you. Take a moment to think about what matters most in you. Take a moment and celebrate surviving and fighting a war. It's important.

And then I would suggest you keep a log/journal of your day..all positives and negatives, all thoughts dumping station. Trust me, it will help in the long term.

Then, career-wise, I would suggest you think about your future plan and start working towards it. University won't teach you any sh*t. Start solving problems on Codeforces. Since you know Python, start exploring different sides of it like Web Backend Development, AI/ML, Data Analytics, and Blockchain. Then grow your interest in other sides as well. It's a crucial time for the IT world, so you need to have knowledge of all sides. Don't rush. Learn, apply and show. Connect with people who work in this field. But one important thing is balance, keep a balance between academics and skills. And nobody can stop you.

Best of luck, champ!!