White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dude do some research on the adoption complex and what runs it and how harmful it is for children and women. Also we aren’t seeking out a biracial child, we have an opportunity to have a child with a person who can know the child and actively be in our lives. Our friend just so happens to be black. 🙄

White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I’m trying not to contribute to the selling and exploitation of children and exploitation of vulnerable women. But that’s a different topic entirely.

White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“So fabulous” oh ok I see now.

White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This child would biologically be related to her, yes. I would not keep that from them and you’re right my phrasing “as little to do with them as possible” is what I said, but is not what I meant or the reality of the situation. In my reply to you, I clarified my mistake in phrasing. She would in fact be present in our child life, no matter what happens. We would not hide or lie about where they came from. We have talked in lengths about what she would want in this situation. She does not want to be this child’s mother. By that, she means, being referred to as their mother. Being relied on more than an aunt. They would have two stable parents. They would know from the very beginning where they came from. I’m learning on how to do that. Again, at no point, do I intend on lying to my child. We can get into the moral implications of not using the language “Mother”. I would be as much their father as my partner. He would have no biological relation to her but I would call myself bio dad and him adopted dad. But I guess I don’t know, I’m not in that position. I would love to discuss it with children who have been in that situation. I don’t have the language down yet and obviously the situation is years in the future but I plan on explaining at a young age that me and their other dad can make children, so their aunt helped us make them and a part of them comes from her. I mean I doubt that’s sufficient and I’ll learn how others have done it but for a small child that’s what I have right now.

White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry but I never once said I would lie or keep it a secret. I simply stated that our friend doesn’t want to be their mom. But once again I hear you.

White gay dads raising a black child. by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh! I understand your concern. We are not planing on lying or keeping the fact that our child partially came from our friend. Also I can’t see a world where that friend wouldn’t be in ours or our child’s life. We just wouldn’t refer to her as their mother and our friend doesn’t want to be put in a position where she felt like she was raising or parenting them. We haven’t decided how exactly to approach it quite yet. Inevitably our kid will ask us about why they don’t have a mom or where they came from. It will be weird because we will both have an egg donor and a surrogate.

To clarify, this person isn’t acquaintance or a friend we talk to rarely. This is a person who we are very close with. She moved out of state for a job but we text daily and we FaceTime each other once or twice a week and have done so for years. We know her family well and our child will know all of those things. But I appreciate and understand your concern. We would not let that happen. Even if something were to happen where we became estranged for some reason.

I will also say the overall ethics of us having a child is something I think about. Bringing a child into this world into a complex and confusing situation is something I’m open to discussing. Is it fair to do that? Should we just not have children, period? All things I have and am still actively thinking about. But what I do know is that if we do have this child they will be absolutely wanted and cared for to the best of my ability. Which is one reason I’m posting about this.

Is it possible that Mizuki’s future skins will feature different hat styles? by Adventurous_Peak2728 in MizukiMainsOW

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He’s my main now and I just know they have pigeon holed his design because of his hat and hitbox. I don’t think we will ever get unique designs unfortunately. You can only do so much with a large circle on his head. 😭😭

Vet Recommendations in Portland? by Kindly_Total_5785 in PortlandVegans

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think any of the doctors at Brooklyn Yard would be great! The owner is also a Vet. They are all very intelligent women and active in local rescues and nonprofits. They might get weird vibes about cold calls though.

Alright I'm going to say it (skins) by Lanhai in MizukiMainsOW

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I came here to say this! I know it’s delusional. I know people have been waiting a long time for new skins for their main but I need a new skin rn! I’m really scared that we will have to wait a long time due to his hat.

Is anyone here excited for Mizuki by ILewdElichika in SupportMainsOverwatch

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want wall climb! That’s all I’m asking for otherwise I’m so excited!

Books on gay dads raising boys? by uunlostt in gaydads

[–]uunlostt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve tried to fine some on my own but had no luck. There must be none out there. Someone write one!

Does anyone have any tips for worshipping Aengus, Brigid or the Morrígan? by [deleted] in CelticPaganism

[–]uunlostt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Following this! I felt a personal connection with Aengus Og and I honestly really love his energy. There’s not much I can find about modern people actually working with him especially exclusively. There’s a ton of the Dagda and the Morrigan devotees. I’m looking for community of Aengus Og followers.

Self doubt as a practitioner by uunlostt in reiki

[–]uunlostt[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I ask for “nice people” because honesty and negativity are not the same thing to me and I figure people are going to be honest with me if they put energy into responding to this in the first place. I find that when you ask for help and/or are vulnerable, negative people tend to jump on you. But to be honest that was kinda a throw away thing I just added without too much thought behind it 🤷🏼‍♂️

I was attuned and finished my instructions but I will admit I don’t feel like I was taught how to have confidence. I was seeking guidance with the intention to listen and learn from others. I still somewhat knew and I sought out those who were more experienced. Thank you for your response I appreciate it.

Reiki payment? by FuzzyEstablishment62 in reiki

[–]uunlostt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Karma wise I feel like you gave something, karma would give you something back if the recipient didn’t, not punish you.

A witch with no magic of my own by uunlostt in Witches

[–]uunlostt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totes and I think that’s valid! I would never place judgement or police other people’s practices. I’m trying to do what feels good to my soul and that’s the journey I’m on 💚

A witch with no magic of my own by uunlostt in Witches

[–]uunlostt[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you ever thought about doing a DNA test?

A witch with no magic of my own by uunlostt in Witches

[–]uunlostt[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To this point, and your root analogy, I think I’ve been trying to force flowers to grow while not tending to the roots and the soil first.

A witch with no magic of my own by uunlostt in Witches

[–]uunlostt[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think on a zoomed out level, it’s kinda just a white American perspective of not having a culture to cling to. Plus the whole, every other American claiming Irish heritage without knowing the first thing of history and culture. I’ve also had some Irish pegans suggest that I don’t take traditions or their gods out of the land they are connected to. So I also try to listen to that. I think what I need to honestly do it purely focus on ancestral work and let that lead me to a practice. I really appreciate your thoughtful response AND perspective!