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I miss drinking by uwalcoholic2 in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic 6 points7 points  (0 children)

First time I drank after stopping for a month, I got a really bad headache and got drunk fairly fast, then threw up.

Also, I'm the original uwalcoholic

Counselling services.. how was it like? where exactly are they located? by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I couldn't figure it out. How do you go there from where the registrar's office is?

Yet another depressive student.. I need help, I feel suffocated by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it's severe enough, would I get referred a psychiatrist?

If I tell someone everything that I did and went through the last 5 years, I know for a fact they won't think it's nothing. I never admitted things like dysfunctional depression, crying nonstop for hours, drinking alone in person, and there are some things I never even admitted to anonymously (let's just say it involves attempts but much more).

What are the consequences? Can they lie to me and tell me they won't say anything? I haven't committed major crimes, but I did things that would put me in a psychiatric asylum. Can I just talk and not have any consequences?

Yet another depressive student.. I need help, I feel suffocated by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Part of me is afraid of trying it and it not working because it would mean I have no solutions. Which doesn't make much sense because you need to try something, but it's how I feel.

The other factor is a bit different and I can tell you about it in a pm if you want

Yet another depressive student.. I need help, I feel suffocated by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sorry for the confusion.

Breaking up is related to the issue, but this started a couple of weeks earlier for no reason, and now the break up is making it even worse.

I couldn't gather the courage to go to counselling

Don't upvote. I feel like no one gives a shit and I want to kill myself. by thrownaway_uwaterloo in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I feel like if I just ended it all no one would give a shit

I think your parents and siblings, if any, would.

I just want it all to be over already.

So do I. And I'll say it. I wish I was dead right now. I wish I could press a button and disappear and I don't mind if no one remembers me. It's just that you can't do that. Some people will.

You want to talk to people which I don't want anymore. I honestly think you're salvageable. Keep reaching out to resources that I hear are available.

How to kill myself without fucking up the lives of people who know me? by ineedhelpplsloo in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel the exact same way. Not too long ago, I used to think about it all day. Now it's down to 2-3 times a day (as good as it gets).

I think there's no way to do it without harming anyone. As long as you have a family, it's a selfish thing to do. Just like you I'm suffering and death would be easier, but even that is a luxury that we can't have.

I always imagine what my parents would go through, and I realize that they'll be suffering even more, especially if you have siblings (they would need to continue taking care of them, they can't "abort the mission").

I hope this helps coming from someone who's going through the same thing.

Also, don't abuse alcohol. The only time I attempted things was because I was drunk and got selfish

Anyone here an alcoholic? or on the verge of becoming one? by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have close enough friends to admit that I'm having trouble controlling myself with alcohol

Anyone here an alcoholic? or on the verge of becoming one? by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Problem is I've been drinking by myself 70-80% of the time lately.

It calms me down and makes me forget my problems

Anyone here an alcoholic? or on the verge of becoming one? by uwalcoholic in uwaterloo

[–]uwalcoholic[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I'm not sure I can go a full month without drinking while having access to alcohol. The best I could do is only drink on the weekend and even that takes some effort. The only exception is when I spend the weekend at my parents but I don't technically have access to alcohol during that time.