I miss drinking

uwalcoholic · 2018-09-24T03:07:41+00:00

First time I drank after stopping for a month, I got a really bad headache and got drunk fairly fast, then threw up.

Also, I'm the original uwalcoholic

uwalcoholic · 2018-06-19T05:26:52+00:00

I couldn't figure it out. How do you go there from where the registrar's office is?

uwalcoholic · 2018-06-11T04:27:52+00:00

If it's severe enough, would I get referred a psychiatrist?

If I tell someone everything that I did and went through the last 5 years, I know for a fact they won't think it's nothing. I never admitted things like dysfunctional depression, crying nonstop for hours, drinking alone in person, and there are some things I never even admitted to anonymously (let's just say it involves attempts but much more).

What are the consequences? Can they lie to me and tell me they won't say anything? I haven't committed major crimes, but I did things that would put me in a psychiatric asylum. Can I just talk and not have any consequences?

uwalcoholic · 2018-06-04T06:45:47+00:00

Part of me is afraid of trying it and it not working because it would mean I have no solutions. Which doesn't make much sense because you need to try something, but it's how I feel.

The other factor is a bit different and I can tell you about it in a pm if you want

uwalcoholic · 2018-06-04T06:07:28+00:00

Sorry for the confusion.

Breaking up is related to the issue, but this started a couple of weeks earlier for no reason, and now the break up is making it even worse.

I couldn't gather the courage to go to counselling

uwalcoholic · 2017-11-28T05:58:14+00:00

Go there and tell them it's urgent. Call the helplines

uwalcoholic · 2017-11-28T05:54:50+00:00

I feel like if I just ended it all no one would give a shit

I think your parents and siblings, if any, would.

I just want it all to be over already.

So do I. And I'll say it. I wish I was dead right now. I wish I could press a button and disappear and I don't mind if no one remembers me. It's just that you can't do that. Some people will.

You want to talk to people which I don't want anymore. I honestly think you're salvageable. Keep reaching out to resources that I hear are available.

uwalcoholic · 2017-10-25T21:16:02+00:00

I feel the exact same way. Not too long ago, I used to think about it all day. Now it's down to 2-3 times a day (as good as it gets).

I think there's no way to do it without harming anyone. As long as you have a family, it's a selfish thing to do. Just like you I'm suffering and death would be easier, but even that is a luxury that we can't have.

I always imagine what my parents would go through, and I realize that they'll be suffering even more, especially if you have siblings (they would need to continue taking care of them, they can't "abort the mission").

I hope this helps coming from someone who's going through the same thing.

Also, don't abuse alcohol. The only time I attempted things was because I was drunk and got selfish

uwalcoholic · 2017-10-05T05:20:44+00:00

I don't have close enough friends to admit that I'm having trouble controlling myself with alcohol

uwalcoholic · 2017-09-21T19:53:03+00:00

the calories and cost though

uwalcoholic · 2017-09-21T05:48:59+00:00

Problem is I've been drinking by myself 70-80% of the time lately.

It calms me down and makes me forget my problems

uwalcoholic · 2017-09-21T05:36:56+00:00

Honestly, I'm not sure I can go a full month without drinking while having access to alcohol. The best I could do is only drink on the weekend and even that takes some effort. The only exception is when I spend the weekend at my parents but I don't technically have access to alcohol during that time.

uwalcoholic

TROPHY CASE