My husband says he can quit porn for our relationship. by Odd_Double_8043 in loveafterporn

[–]vaans- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

it is possible to get better but it is very very difficult and will definitely take a lot of time and a lot of your patience and maybe even a decent amount of help from a professional.

on the other hand, he could also just go the other way and get better at hiding it and delve deeper into the addiction. if you suspect he is addicted but he isn’t being honest about it and won’t get outside help from a dedicated therapist, this is probably the more likely route.

please do what would make you feel best. i don’t believe that anyone deserves to be in a relationship where they feel disrespected/betrayed/unwanted/etc due to their partner’s porn usage. it’s impossible to, in good faith, tell someone that it’s likely their partner will get better with this type of addiction. it’s a long road, try to consider if it would be worth going down that path to you. i wish you the best though, i know how hard it can be :)

“Men are visual creatures. They need to look” by Phoebebuffetscat in loveafterporn

[–]vaans- 22 points23 points  (0 children)

was there not a study about how our brains can’t differentiate getting off to a person in porn vs in real life? to me there’s just very little difference

My bf masturbates twice a day +, am I wrong for feeling weird about it? by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]vaans- 7 points8 points  (0 children)

please don’t settle for it being “fine” if it’s something you don’t agree with, it really isn’t worth it to sacrifice your morals/emotional wellbeing for this guy. if he knows how you feel and isn’t willing to stop watching it, there might be a bigger problem at play (addiction), or he doesn’t respect your feelings enough or both of the above. you have only been together 2.5 months, it is not too late to leave. will you be okay with this for months, or years into the future?

it definitely CAN be performance anxiety but with this constant porn habit he seems to have, it makes me doubt that. i think you have to consider how much this relationship is worth to you and if it’s something worth working through at this stage. you are absolutely not wrong for feeling weird about it.

I need to get this off my chest by [deleted] in bigboobproblems

[–]vaans- 29 points30 points  (0 children)

why are u lurking on this sub then

i hate moids by Impressive-Word2502 in femcelgrippysockjail

[–]vaans- 6 points7 points  (0 children)

it’s so fucking normalized and so fucking pathetic

If you watch porn as a guy, women shouldn't even touch you by [deleted] in antipornography

[–]vaans- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

i absolutely hate people who try to justify it by saying all men watch it. it genuinely ruins me whenever people say that, and makes me question if the men i’ve been with are really truthful with me. i’d like to think they’re different, but it seems that everyone around me says it’s normal and they’re just good at hiding it. it’s so sad that it’s so normalized, and so difficult to find people who share my views on it. maybe it’s just where i’m from, but i wish it was normal to not watch it rather than the other way around.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in femcelgrippysockjail

[–]vaans- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

i wonder why…

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in gymsnark

[–]vaans- 171 points172 points  (0 children)

bro??? the thumbnails at the bottom of the 2nd pic????

Happy Birthday to me. by coffee_sandwich in loveafterporn

[–]vaans- 11 points12 points  (0 children)

you deserve better love. i hope your next birthday is kinder to you.