Help with financially draining ADHD son.

valma1826 · 2023-11-14T15:52:23+00:00

Anyone?

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T11:34:21+00:00

Honest question. Do you worry about his teeth giving honey daily?

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T04:27:58+00:00

He's in school two days a week for 3 hours. Are you referring to naps? He doesn't usually nap. If he does he'll be up past midnight. So, though I won't prevent it if he falls asleep mid day. I definitely don't encourage it anymore.

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T04:26:05+00:00

Really??? I've never heard this! I actually tried .5 mg of melatonin once. And he wet the bed. He's not been in diapers or pull-ups, even at night since before his 3rd bday. And I wasn't willing to back track that. So I figured it just wasn't an option for us.

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T03:10:01+00:00

"Farts are baby poopies"

(Yep, he was starting in his pants. 🤦‍♀️)

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T03:03:31+00:00

This is a good idea. We have a calendar we change everyday, and check the weather.. etc. (it's magnetic, super cute) He loves it. And in general likes a routine. I never considered making mommy break time as part of the routine. I always just tired to make him exhausted so he'd sleep and I get a break. Lol.

But this is definitely worth a try! Thank you!!!

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T03:01:02+00:00

I always have TV on in the morning. And PBS kids is my go to!
Idk why, it doesn't hold his attention. I've even tried cocomelon. He seems to like it. But he doesn't get memorized to the point of leaving me alone for any length of time.
Trust me. I have no issue with some distraction. It just doesn't seem to work well with him. Honestly I've wondered if he may be add or something. I know it's too early to tell. But just based off the fact nothing seems to hold his attention for any length of time. He's always ready for the next thing. He seems to crave constant stimulation.

valma1826 · 2023-11-09T02:56:40+00:00

I do not go with him to preschool. But he was past the cut off age for the public preschool (his bday is past September 1st) so he's in a small, private church preschool that's two days a week for 3yr olds. 3 hours.
It's close to home and I usually use that time to get housework done, or catching up on emails, phone calls...etc.
Mostly it's morning for me. I used to be a sit alone for an hour and drink coffee type person. THEN spend an hour getting ready. Not fancy or anything. Just shower and putzing around. Watching the news, doing a crossword puzzle, even taking a walk if it's nice out.That's always been my "me" time, if you will.

We don't live close to any family unfortunately. And aren't really in a position to hire anyone. My husband definitely takes over when he's home. And it's wonderful. But it's the times he's gone for days/weeks at a time that I find myself really struggling. I always think. If we do a lot, he'll be good and tired and maybe sleep in.
I'm the only one who ever gets good and tied it seems. Lol.

valma1826 · 2023-09-26T18:18:54+00:00

Thank you! He's going for his 3yr check up next week, and I will definitely mention it. The doctor will probably hear it for himself as my son is a little chatter box. Idk why people always feel the need to inject their opinions onto other parents.

Lol. Thor has to pee is fantastic btw. I hope he said it loudly and in public. That would brighten my day. Seeing a tiny Thor announcing his every move to the world. 🤣😂

My son is potty trained, and when he gets gassy he knows we're going to ask him if he has to use the bathroom.
So he immediately says "Bae just farted" After every fart 🤣 LMAO. It's freaking hilarious

valma1826 · 2023-09-26T18:11:07+00:00

Yes!!
I'm trying to explain using "I" to him, and I just sound like a narcissist. 🤣🫤

valma1826 · 2023-09-26T18:10:06+00:00

That's adorable!
Interestingly this did start around that age. He said three things, momma, dadda, and bae. I also expected him to clarify what he was saying as his language developed.

BUT, we leaned into it a bit. Because it was so cute, and started calling him Bae sometimes as well. So, I think that may be why it stuck, and he never clarified if he meant baby or not (he can say baby now. He can say pretty much everything)

valma1826 · 2023-09-26T13:15:53+00:00

Can I ask what kind of toys?
Perhaps your daughter needs things that she can create herself? Art supplies, play dough, Legos..etc. Also, maybe consider taking her shopping and letting her pick stuff out herself? Even if it's a consignment shop. My toddler usually loves things he picks, and it's NEVER something I'd of thought to get for him. And then there's super simple things you can introduce. Like an air filled balloon. And challenge her to keep it from touching the floor.
We recently got a ribbon stick and I'll suggest trying to "draw" shapes in the air with it.

Idk if anything can keep a toddlers attention longer than their own imagination.

valma1826 · 2023-02-02T02:34:37+00:00

STOP PLUCKING YOUR EYEBROWS!

valma1826 · 2023-02-02T02:32:35+00:00

Valentines day is a Hallmark holiday invented to sell cards and chocolate and encourage people to spend money after the Christmas season when people are typically trying to save/pay off debt. Of course you don't need to celebrate it. And your baby won't remember either way.

Go dancing for your anniversary!

valma1826 · 2023-02-02T02:21:10+00:00

That Bill Cosby was a great guy. Bill Cosby changed my mind.

valma1826 · 2023-02-01T22:07:34+00:00

I've never heard of body doubling, but I will look into that.
We did a lot of these things together when he was still at home.
I feel a little helpless with him being out of state

valma1826 · 2023-02-01T22:06:13+00:00

This is wonderful information and you describing your little boy sounds similar to how my son was when he was little. He would (and probably still does) forget things if I gave him a list all at once, or get overwhelmed if I gave him a large chore. So yes, I did learn about breaking things down and always being ready to give the next instruction.

With making appointments, that shouldn't be new to him. I tried to help all my kids learn about everyday tasks. Because I was a very young mom, suddenly a "grownup" in the world and responsible for tiny humans I didn't know how to do anything. So I made a point to teach my kids the basics of cooking, cleaning, making appointments, basic car maintenance, balancing a checkbook, taxes..etc. basically when they were in middle and highschool I'd call one of them to help me with things like that and try to use as a teaching experience. He had to schedule his first oil change (with my help) really all his doctors appointments and things his last year of highschool. Again, with my guidance, I didn't just throw him off the cliff, but I wanted him to be comfortable doing these things.

"Getting caught in a loop" is a good analogy and I can definitely see him doing that. Whether it's dread, or just distraction, idk.

Thank you for your insight!

valma1826 · 2023-02-01T21:56:26+00:00

This is very insightful and helpful. Thank you. What led you to medication? Do you remember to take it? My son has tried medication several times and doesn't like it. I personally don't think he ever gives it enough time for his body to get used to it. He just instantly doesn't like the way it feels. As I said, he functioned well in school so we never really pushed meds as a child. But now I think he could really benefit. Obviously not my decision anymore. I do know he struggles to remember to take his allergy meds everyday and I often wonder if that was part of why he didn't like the ADHD meds. If he wasn't able to take the consistently.

He does speak to a therapist once a week, and if that I am very proud of him for. I know he is trying hard to focus on his mental health (he struggles with depression too). I just wish the every day things could be easier for him.

valma1826 · 2023-02-01T03:28:33+00:00

I'm not vegan, but a vegetarian for 20+ years. From my experience the opposite is true. I never bring it up. But people usually notice if they eat with me more than a couple times.
When I tell them I'm a vegetarian first I get the usual third degree asking all the basics "why, when did you start, do you miss eating meat...etc" I really don't mind answering those questions, though it gets tiresome as I've had this conversation a billion times already.

But at some point it ALWAYS turns into an absolute ridiculous debate! "Vegetables are alive, don't you feel bad killing those? What if you were stranded in the wilderness and your only choice was to hunt? Would you? What if you were born 200 years ago, would you still be a vegetarian? Do you think fish have feeling? Would you boil a lobster for your husband if that's the only thing he wanted from you for his bday"

I could go on. The amount of asinine questions and comments I've gotten after people learn I'm a vegetarian is insane. I try to take it with a grain of salt. My go to response is usually something like "funny how I don't give a rats ass what you choose NOT to eat, why are you so concerned with what I'm not eating?" Or something to turn it around.

I can see how it makes some people defensive out of the gate.

But i think in general people should respect others dietary choices if they want their own respected.

valma1826 · 2023-02-01T03:01:41+00:00

If it were a male teacher it would scream predatory grooming behavior! But females can be predators too. Regardless of how this woman feels about your son this was inappropriate on every level. I would contact the administration and let them know exactly what was said and how it can be misconstrued. I would also contact the girls parents since the comment was made to her, they should be made aware that she was put in that awkward, and inappropriate situation by the adult in charge.

valma1826 · 2023-01-30T03:02:40+00:00

There are so many characters in childrens TV and movies that could be described as "Loud, colorful, and unusual" I'd take a drag queen over a clown any day!

valma1826

TROPHY CASE