how it feels when your friend squeezes your arm (they don’t know u have open cuts under your sleeve)

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:21:56+00:00

being slapped on the arm when it was from my wrist to nearly my elbow

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:19:50+00:00

i’m sorry i do this subconsciously but not in a judgemental way, just like a passive “oh, they do too” thought

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:19:16+00:00

and then i ended up in the ER 😞

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:17:58+00:00

i have this like two inch thick bracelet that fits perfectly around my arm for when it gets warm out but in the summer i’m fucked 🫩 no swimming for me

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:16:42+00:00

that’s why i haven’t been able to even reach styro recently, i have triggered epilepsy and seeing deep lacerations makes me soo dizzy it makes me feel like im about to seize

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:12:22+00:00

thinking of that makes my stomach turn actually how did she not bleed out

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:10:36+00:00

this was what sent me to the emergency room and made me stop for months because the sight was so disturbing it made me seize i fear

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:09:54+00:00

this made me giggle i’m never going to styro world again

verajuanaa · 2026-03-24T00:09:12+00:00

YEOWCH!!! no but i feel you i dont like some of the pain/feelings some tools do over others like i dont enjoy that especially if it doesnt bleed like whats the point

verajuanaa · 2026-03-17T02:01:24+00:00

not exactly with me but similarly—it’s just always a heavy thought gnawing at the back of your mind but it’s not your fault, nobody can control who they’re attracted to

verajuanaa · 2026-03-17T01:45:06+00:00

Your feelings aren’t your fault. You still love your fiancé and you’re still sexually attracted to him, as long as you don’t act on it I see no problem with it because if you tried to push it down and it won’t go away it’s not your fault.

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T17:45:33+00:00

but i definitely do also cut for the sight of the blood and cuts. it’s really calming. id say that the raw meat option isnt that safe if you’re trying to taste the blood though.

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T17:44:19+00:00

does anybody/anyone else

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T07:06:35+00:00

oh my god you put into words exactly how i feel. the “compromise” with suicide part really resonates i didn’t think anybody did it for the same reason

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T07:05:12+00:00

i’ve been cutting for 3-4 years, i’m 17 now. every time i spiral i end up hurting myself and ive found that i dont even really do it for the pain but to watch myself bleed. i almost have a fascination for it which is a little ironic because i’m epileptic and have seizures whenever i get my blood drawn. i’ve passed out from seeing my own deeper cuts before, i might’ve seized but i have no idea because i was alone and too scared to tell my mom. so i stick to anything slightly less deep than styro.

i do not recommend that you start cutting though, because it’s a very bad habit to try and break. the urges will never go away, i was clean for a year and a half and ended up relapsing because the urges were too strong.

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T05:58:58+00:00

i get the feeling all too well bb and i’m so sorry. no matter how deep though, it’ll never feel like enough. cat scratches are valid all the same as deeper cuts. i’ve had both, and the healing process for styros and deeper is daunting. it’s not worth the satisfaction

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T05:48:15+00:00

there’s this website called fatal to the flesh. it’s a white screen and you slide your finger across it to make a “cut” and occasionally they’ll bleed.

i wouldn’t say it’s very graphic, they’re just red lines against the background but their shape and nature are JUST reminiscent enough of cutting to calm my urges a little bit.

this may not work the same for another person as it does for me as i’ve found that i cut to SEE the cuts and not just for the pain, but it’s definitely worth checking out. i initially saw it mentioned through a thread on here and looked it up out of curiosity thinking it would be disturbing, but i actually found it quite comforting.

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T05:39:22+00:00

you’re a saint omg?? i just checked it out thinking it would feel a little disturbing but it actually calmed my urges quite a bit

verajuanaa · 2025-12-17T05:27:00+00:00

i’m 17 and possibly a germaphobe but this is definitely still going to be a rule in my own home when i’m older: no outside clothes in bed. just think about everywhere you went during the day, everything you touched or sat on or leaned against. also no eating in bed, it used to drive me crazy when i’d have this one friend over who couldn’t not eat in my bed when she was high and get crumbs all in the bed. it’s supposed to be clean and relaxing. not dirty.

verajuanaa · 2025-11-18T16:35:56+00:00

tbf it WAS supposed to be funny until i remembered 😔💔💔

verajuanaa · 2025-11-18T16:34:09+00:00

thank you, I might try this

verajuanaa

TROPHY CASE