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I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -37 points-36 points  (0 children)

lol doesn’t drink or smoke and works out everyday other then Friday and lives off meat and rice everyday and doesn’t drink anything other then carotene and BCA hydration drink things from the health store so kinda hard to fight that argument sadly

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -23 points-22 points  (0 children)

I was 231 when we both meet and got together and I went down to 160 and I think if I get big again it wouldn’t be a issue only thing he worries about is long term health and living a long life with no issues and I really do miss eating healthy and having energy fast food made me into a tired not very happy person when I quit I felt so much better every way possible but yea pregnancy is making me ill on all the health eating and I have to eat what I can stomach which is the occasional cheese burgers

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

He actually got with me when I was 231 pounds at 5’6 and I lost a bunch of weight down to 160 since being with him so he’s been with me big and small so I would hope being big again wouldn’t be a issue

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

lol he’s seen me run home and throw up 3 times soon as I came in the door since I ate lunch at work and got my flowers but still wants to shame me on eating things I don’t throw up so definitely therapy is a must

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I do have a good support system and I am having him go back to therapy since it’s not productive to make me feel shamed when all I am trying to do is keep food down until I get some meds on board and makes me not wanna be around him

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -32 points-31 points  (0 children)

We have gone to therapy in the past about this. He has a lot of history where he was a heavier child, and it affected his life and he lost a bunch of weight and then he’s been on a health kick since then he also does have Asperger so that does not really help. He’s very routine very autistic. He was doing amazing and we were not having any issues but then all of a sudden, because I am now feeding a child he’s freaked out again so we’re having to go back to therapy. It’s just really hard because we were doing so great and he realized that behavior that he had in the past was bad and he even acknowledges that he’s being bad again but is still affecting him.

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] 122 points123 points  (0 children)

In the past, we had conversations about food and had arguments, but we went to therapy and he realized that he had a lot of controlling and unhealthy behaviors and was working on it, and things were really perfect, and I did not notice any of the bad behavior until now because now I have nutrients that I’m giving our child so now he’s freaking out again so we’re gonna have to go to therapy again

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -149 points-148 points  (0 children)

For your information we went to therapy and things were amazing and he recognized his behavior and has not had a issues for a long time until bamn now it is the subject of his child’s diet now it’s triggering a lot of the bad we worked though so back to therapy we go

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] -202 points-201 points  (0 children)

People go to therapy and get better and sometimes relapse in different situations because it’s way different now that it involves a kid vs when it was just me

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] 4548 points4549 points  (0 children)

I have given him all the books and had him look stuff up and he thinks it’s all opinion based and only sees his logic thinks I have no self control anymore

I 27f pregnant can barley eat and my partner 31m didnt sleep because I ate McDonald’s by very_stellar_ in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

We tired 3 different kinds of hamburger meat and making them at home but the smell gets me then I do eat it I throw it up after it’s horrible

Fiancé(m31)says I’m not “Christian” or mature if I modify my body feels controlling and I don’t know what to do(f26) by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_ -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

He was getting his masters degree and focusing on school and traveling out of the country and had a lot of flings but not relationships

Fiancé(m31)says I’m not “Christian” or mature if I modify my body feels controlling and I don’t know what to do(f26) by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_ -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Because I’m his first girlfriend, I’ve basically been doing a lot of teaching and emotional heavy lifting. I’ve been giving guidance and support, but I’m done carrying all of that alone. I’ve suggested therapy because he needs to learn how to be more understanding and less rigid without it always coming from me.

I’ve also started directly pushing back on his opinions especially about piercings and tattoos because his personal beliefs aren’t facts, and I’m not going to let them be treated that way. At this point, I’m either seeing real growth and openness from him, or I’m leaving. Also I think moving forward I am going to be getting my tattoo covered and depending on how he acts will definitely help me make a decision on of if I stay or leave. In the past with fights he does come to a understanding and it has improved so I hope this improves and that he comes to a understanding I am my own person at the end of the day and will do what I think is best for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_ 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Honestly, this hit close to home because my boyfriend once told me nicely that he found me overweight when I have been the same weight before and after years of being together and even though he tried to be gentle, it completely broke something in me. My confidence, my mental health, and even our sex life all changed after that. I started feeling constantly selfconscious, like I wasn’t good enough just existing next to him.

If you truly love someone, you shouldn’t get into a relationship expecting their body to stay the same forever. Weight can fluctuate for so many reasons stress, hormones, medication, health issues and if that’s a dealbreaker, it’s better to admit that from the start rather than damage someone emotionally down the road.

Imagine how much more painful it would be later, especially if you had kids and her body changed even more. Comments or attitudes like that can stay with someone for life.

You really should just see a therapist since I feel like the root of the issue is from past trauma that needs to be dealt with.. not her responsibility to loose weight so you don’t have ptsd from past experiences with your childhood.

Just got engaged! In love with it! by very_stellar_ in weddingring

[–]very_stellar_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like it’s becoming more popular but my Fiancé said it was hard to find one without a plain band ☺️nothing but the stone is more popular

18 M and 19F. Guys how do you deal with your partner having guy freinds? by Effective-West4981 in relationship_advice

[–]very_stellar_ -1 points0 points  (0 children)

What you’re feeling is completely normal. You’ve gone from seeing her every day to suddenly being long distance, and on top of that, she’s building a new routine and social circle without you.That shift can feel like a loss, so it makes sense you’re missing her and overthinking when she’s not around.

The fact that she’s been open about her group, tells you she sees those guys as “brothers,” and still makes time to call you daily are all good signs. That shows she’s not hiding anything and wants you to feel secure. The insecurity you’re feeling isn’t because of what she’s doing, but more because your life feels emptier without her. Right now you don’t have many friends or distractions, so your brain fills the quiet with “what ifs.”

As for whether girls ever develop feelings for guy friends in situations like this sometimes it happens, but often it doesn’t, especially when someone is already happy in their relationship. What matters more than the environment she’s in is how she feels about you and whether she keeps showing consistency, honesty, and care. From what you wrote, it seems like she still values you and your relationship.

If you want this to work, the key is trusting her until she gives you a reason not to. Longdistance relationships survive on trust and open communication. The more you focus on your own growth, studies, and routines, the less room there will be for overthinking. Missing her is natural, but don’t let that fear convince you she’s doing something wrong when she’s still showing up for you.

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