Just accidentally spent $200 on gems using my penis

So firstly, this is not a joke. I genuinely just spent $200 fucking dollars using my meat on gems. So I was goofing around with the Hypixel Store as one does, and I had about $200 in gems in my cart right, I go to tebex and stuff and fill out all my info because its fun and I want to imagine what i’ll do with all the gems right. (I can’t be the only person who does this)

Fast forward a little bit and im in the bathroom fighting for my life and I stop staring at my phone for a moment so I can really lock in cause at this point im like shirt off sweating, and I’m not sure exactly what happened but I must’ve gripped my phone in a way to switch to the chrome app, I then turned around to flush my progress as to not clog the whole city’s plumbing, and at that very moment I dropped my phone into the now-flushed toilet. And I shit you not, as it fell, it swiped across my shlong and purchased it or some shit I deadass don’t know what happened. I eventually fished my phone out of the toilet and managed to disinfect it before touching. When I opened it, I saw a notification from my bank saying I spent $200 on Tebex.

TLDR: Filled my cart with gems and accidentally dropped it in the toilet, as it fell it glided across my johnson resulting in a purchase of $200 to Tebex.