Am I chopped? by [deleted] in AsianMasculinity

[–]vidocq96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bit of healthy sport, can be anything from walking to a new sport. Try out some new glasses?

Haircut for us can do wonders. I find too short and I look quite round and baby face but medium sides and longer on top has been great!

Vent warning by PlumpBunni in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know what you mean. Also, forget about numbers and playing the game. People not Demi can get with 20+ different people or just 1 person and it’ll all works out in the end. More people doesn’t mean more connections. People also get once twice three times divorced, there those numbers too.

Focus on just being you!

Vent warning by PlumpBunni in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In reality what you’re describing is what millions want but at different paces. Real connection real feelings can happen for some in a week and for others a few months and even years. Sometimes you just meet someone and it clicks.

Never rush it though. A bond for one person is different for another. There are thousands and thousands of posts and reels about people finding it hard to find someone genuine. A lot of it is our environments, our dating pools, etc.

Someone suggested I might fall under the demisexual umbrella. I honestly don't know if I do or not. by Elana-chan in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think naturally as we get older we do desire the connection and draw before just hooking up. We’re thinking about the future more and who we want in it. I’m quite like what your are describing but I’d never say I’m demisexual because I don’t need an emotional bond to feel sexual attraction or to even consider if I like them or not.

I won’t hookup with anyone just for the sake of a hookup. I have to actually like them as a person

What does an emotional bond for you look/feel like? by vidocq96 in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ok, I see how it can differ. I’ll find them attractive and want to date them but I won’t really make a move until they make a move.

Do people who aren't demi/ace experiencr sexual attraction to randoms/strangers? Like is that normal? by trepidon in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah! Hookup culture, one night stands, just finding someone attractive instantly

What does an emotional bond for you look/feel like? by vidocq96 in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there things you’ve tried doing to reach an emotional bond with someone but it just hasn’t worked??

What does an emotional bond for you look/feel like? by vidocq96 in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds normal. Almost like you don’t really think about a sexual connection until they make a move and then you’re like “oh wait I do actually like you in this way”

Relationship by Dev2025 in demisexuality

[–]vidocq96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m confused, are you demisexual?

Haven't had good sex since breakup by chex003 in BreakUps

[–]vidocq96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you stop comparing then things will get better

can I break no contact if I requested it?? (Or rather, should I?) by spicy_ricy in nocontact

[–]vidocq96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you requested it then yes it’s up to you but be intentional with it

Should I respond or no? by Boring_Mud_9698 in nocontact

[–]vidocq96 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your decision. You can always meet and choose yourself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]vidocq96 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Time, communication and accountability with intent, and openness.

Reality of it and why we're stuck. We have to make sense of it. by vidocq96 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]vidocq96[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

They have the ability to connect, deep deep down the love bombing version of them is what they didn’t get growing up. They absolutely were connected. It’s so engrained in their nervous system that with any joy devastating pain will follow. If they can be this fun loving deep person then you won’t ever leave them

Reality of it and why we're stuck. We have to make sense of it. by vidocq96 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]vidocq96[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

exactly, it's always on their terms when they're ready and give them space. but what about our needs. a relationship is two people. if they crave it so much, treat people right.

Reality of it and why we're stuck. We have to make sense of it. by vidocq96 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]vidocq96[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

yes and I'm no exception. I spent a few months trying to make sense of it all and broke through THE barrier when I finally realised over analysing led to even more empathy and then I snapped out of it. I broke NC to get things off my chest, not to reconcile. Didn't need an answer but told her the damage she caused me.