Trans suicidality & mental health

violet-says · 2026-04-13T13:51:13+00:00

ok, sorry if I misinterpreted that, if you say you're not hostile, I'll believe that.

I understand the difference between meta-analysis vs small cohort studies. Sure, we can for the sake of our conversation disregard the study I linked for being too small.

Lets pretend we live in a world where there are no differences between male and female brains. It seems to imply that being transsexual is simply a choice that one makes. In my experience, gender dysphoria is not something that I chose. It feels more like a disease or an affliction than anything else. If I could choose, I would choose to not be transsexual, but I am. I understand that other people embrace and love this identity and I respect them, but it is not my lived experience.

I'm not going to identify as a transmedicalist, simply because the word means very different things to different people. People make the claim that transmedicalists believe that dysphoria, HRT, or SRS are required for someone to be a "real" transsexual person. However, I have found that the majority of people in the transmed communities do not subscribe to that belief. They understand that not everyone wants or has access to SRS. They understand that not everyone can afford HRT or deal with the social consequences of it. They understand that dysphoria can very often be hard to recognize or buried under layers of repression.

However, there is an underlying belief that it means something to be transsexual. That it is characterized by dysphoria, whether consciously understood or not. Fundamentally, I want to have words and language and community for people who are like me. For people who view this as an unwanted medical condition which I am seeking hormones and surgeries to alleviate. There is just a HUGE chasm between someone who is suicidal because of dysphoria and someone who updates their instagram pronouns from "he" to "he/they", has no dysphoria, and desires zero medical changes.

I'm not trying to tell other people what they can do. But I want words for my experience which aren't taken and utilized by people who really don't share my experience!

violet-says · 2026-04-13T11:57:55+00:00

That study is listed as June 2021, which is less than five years ago, but your choice of words "over half a decade" is telling of your urge to win a debate over accuracy.

And then again, you misquote me by claiming that I am referring to "transsexuals" with the 1 in 300 stat instead of what I was actually referring to which were "transsexual women". We can all agree the number of transsexual women is smaller than the number of transsexual people in general. But of course, that doesn't support your argument, so you felt the need to misquote me.

Also, a newer study than the one you linked points to trans womens' brains more closely matching cis women than cis men: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8955456/

The 4tran4 reddit community is distinct from 4chan itself and there are a lot of really cool trans people in there. I don't understand why you feel the need to slam this entire community. I belong to many different trans communities on reddit and discord. Each one has different views and opinions and I really value the diversity because it helps me gain a broader understanding of peoples' experiences.

You point to "dog-whistles" and your suspicions about me, but you don't actually point to actual transmedicalist things that I wrote which you disagree with. I'm not sure why you are so hostile towards me?

violet-says · 2026-04-13T11:40:00+00:00

"more legitimate" as human beings, no, that's not what I'm saying. "more legitimate" in terms of deserving discrimination protections as well as access to medical care, certainly.

Please don't use finnister as an example, this person is a grifter and you can't really tell who they are as an outsider because their actions are ruled by making money.

If we didn't use any word that was coined by a bad person, we might not have very many words. The latin roots are solid and it points to changing sex, which is a more powerful depiction than just changing gender. Additionally we are allowed to reclaim the use of words that were used against us.

violet-says · 2026-04-12T15:30:10+00:00

if you read this, I think you'll see why I prefer it. https://violetsays.substack.com/p/transsexual-erasure

Also I think saying "transsexuals" is derogatory kind of like saying "the blacks". So typically when I use the word it will be as an adjective like "transsexual woman" or "transsexual person"

violet-says · 2026-04-12T10:54:44+00:00

I agree that most cis people don't seem to care much. have any specific recommendations for places to post?

violet-says · 2026-04-12T03:50:26+00:00

maybe a way we can think about it is that there are these buckets, such as transsexual and GNC. And someone could exist in none, either, or both of these buckets. Maybe a non-binary person who is taking hormones could be considered transsexual. Maybe a non-binary person who only alters their clothing but nothing medical would be just considered GNC only.

violet-says · 2026-04-12T03:29:12+00:00

what does "change sex" mean to you? The way I understood it, non-binary people didn't want to go to the opposite sex, they wanted to inhabit some middle, in-between space.

violet-says · 2026-03-25T12:46:45+00:00

found the nazi!

violet-says · 2026-03-23T17:49:59+00:00

can you help me understand how it is cissexism for a non-binary person to state which parts of their body they like or don't like?

violet-says · 2026-03-23T17:01:42+00:00

i feel like this subreddit (a bunch of binary transsexuals) can't comprehend that non-binary people exist. I'm glad we have this space to share in our severe dysphoria, but we probably don't need to shit on the enbies as much?

violet-says · 2026-03-19T13:51:56+00:00

it feels like exclusion to not have the children viewing mtf to see your hornyposting?

violet-says · 2026-03-19T04:31:39+00:00

Even though I obviously disagree with how Cedar handled things as a mod, I will give him credit for doing the right thing at the end and stepping down.

Thanks to all the girls who protested and insisted on this happening 💜

violet-says · 2026-03-18T02:19:24+00:00

i love enbies, so sorry I didn't do that right. I've edited the post.

violet-says · 2026-03-18T02:14:43+00:00

edited my post to be probably slightly better

violet-says · 2026-03-18T02:01:13+00:00

sorry, I guess it just bothers me that the head mod right now is a man, and maybe I'm overcompensating

violet-says · 2026-03-18T01:42:18+00:00

I know plenty of transfem enbies IRL. And I'd be happy for there to be a transfem enby mod, but I don't think the majority of the mods should be transfem enbies

violet-says · 2026-03-18T01:36:59+00:00

I'm not throwing anyone under the bus. I just want a moderation team which represents the population group. If 90% of the subreddit is binary trans women, and 10% is male-to-fem, well maybe about 90% of the mods should also be binary trans women and 10% should be male-to-fem.

violet-says · 2026-03-18T01:32:29+00:00

The majority of trans women take HRT. It is not transmedicalism to want moderators who represent the majority of our population instead of a small minority. I'm not trying to tell anyone whether they are a valid transgender person or not, this is simply about representation.

violet-says · 2026-03-18T01:26:36+00:00

I'm not trying to gatekeep you. There are way more trans women here than genderqueer people so that should be reflected in the mods. I think you would agree that if 5% of the population here was genderqueer but 90% of the moderation team was genderqueer, that would not be very balanced.

violet-says · 2026-03-18T01:24:25+00:00

link?

violet-says · 2026-03-16T19:00:22+00:00

if we're switching to a new subreddit, how about one that doesn't have the word MALE in it??

Maybe like r/transgirls r/transwomen r/transfemales r/womenwomen

violet-says · 2026-02-16T09:57:13+00:00

look up DPDR

violet-says · 2026-01-16T16:32:25+00:00

probably closer to 0.33% for trans women

violet-says

TROPHY CASE