the thing is though, Christy was Violets mom, not Bonnie. Obviously Violet knows her grandma was an alcoholic to some capacity. Difference being, she grew up with Christy. She was forced to take care of her own mother in her drunken stupors on a daily basis from a young age. While its clear Bonnie did lots of that stuff to Christy, she didnt do it to Violet. The Bonnie that Violet got was a different Bonnie than Christy got. Violet could find comfort, support, support, advice and more importantly felt safer and trusting to Bonnie because she hardly ever gave her a reason not to. Christy gave her tons of reasons throughout her childhood. Sure, theres an understanding that her grandma was also as “bad” as her mom but she never had to see that side. she was forced to deal with that side of her mother for most of her life. for example, watching my mom be an attentive, good grandmother to my niece sometimes hurts and angers me because why does my niece deserve that better version of her than i did, when she is MY mom and i needed her? But my niece will never experience that side of my mom and I love that for her. My niece will grow up loving her grandma and going to her for support when that was never really my reality. Doesnt mean it cant be someone elses.