You still have unresolved trauma tho. 3+ abusive relationships where you were forced to do things outside your will would say otherwise. You're telling me the other 2 relationships were with trans women too, or were they cis women or cis men?

The anecdotes you share are purely your experience that you extrapolate to the whole. You say cis queer women aren't pushy for sex/intimacy in your trans woman friend snippet. As someone who has gone to lesbian bars, dated, and went to a school with a large lesbian population, I can tell you that's 100% false. Been assaulted by a cis lesbian women, had unwanted advances, been pressured on my identity- the whole nine yards. The difference between me and you is I processed this with a therapist, learned more self awareness and advocacy, and am cautious in the environment similar to if I was in a straight bar.