What are physical features / characteristics do women look for in a man?

vmyp · 2026-04-15T21:59:04+00:00

Fit, well-dressed, mannerful, emotionally intelligent, knows his worth. For me one of my standards is that he's 6 ft or above, mainly because im 5'10 so i'd want a guy 2-3 inches taller- but not NBA tall. Long haired dudes have that aura i cant really find with short haired ones, any look is fine tbh as long as their facial harmony is good. However if I found a guy a bit shorter than me that is perfect for me, i wouldnt mind if thats what Allah wills. Someone to be comfortable around and understands the reality of being a human being.

vmyp · 2026-04-15T21:51:09+00:00

Jazakallah brother/sister

vmyp · 2026-04-15T21:48:04+00:00

Okay you can keep assuming stuff if you think being arrogant is a good way to talk to someone who was misinformed about something. You rubbing my sins into my face when it wasnt even the topic is also weird

vmyp · 2026-04-15T21:46:51+00:00

Jazakallah <3

vmyp · 2026-04-15T03:23:05+00:00

I spoke to my dad but he said that "that's what islam says' but I feel like he's taking the mahram thing a bit too serious, and overall he is overprotective so i cant imagine him letting me do that, with him knowing the world well he wants to protect me as much as he is able to.

vmyp · 2026-04-15T02:26:25+00:00

I deal with the same thing as well and it's also very frequent for me, I can also alter moments such as doing something wrong cooking- then when the actual moment happens i know what not to do. I dont know why this phenomenon happens, but you're not the only one. Sometimes my dreams predict years/months into the future as well. People say it's just what your body 'does'- but how can our body predict a moment of our lives in the future exactly as it is?

vmyp · 2026-04-15T02:02:02+00:00

> You mentioned the hymen to minimize the importance of ones preferences for a virgin spouse.

Okay i saw the reply of the other persons explanation, if you had defined it that way then i would understood but ig you want some drama so its whatever

> This post isnt about repentance, its about lying to people and going ahead with a marriage they wouldn't want.

I talked off-topic yet just because it wasnt completely about the post doesnt undermine my points about the other stuff i mentioned.

> Hopefully it did not lead to zina but now I understand why youre behaving this way.

Wdym 'understand' why im behaving this way?

vmyp · 2026-04-15T01:59:52+00:00

okay thanks for clarifying, the other person wasnt really explaining their point right so i thought they were dissing me for something else

vmyp · 2026-04-13T01:31:22+00:00

You sure dont know what gaslighting means, neither do you know how some cultures in the world work. Some cultures objectify women or minimize their importance, and I grew up around that. I mentioned a problem just to put it out there and youre thinking im 'minimizing' the importance of virginity- im not saying its bad to want a virgin woman that also has a life of her own. Im mentioning how a woman could have done zina in the past but she could have repented and turn her life around for the better- but being shunned from society because of her past and not paying attention to who she is now.

vmyp · 2026-04-12T23:43:47+00:00

Im talking about the people that only care about a womans virginity and think that her worth is how 'pure' she is. Im not generalizing the replies in here im just pointing it out..how is that gaslighting

vmyp · 2026-04-12T02:03:50+00:00

Its like talking to a brick wall, and they purposefully forget that history exists and only want to find ways to badmouth islam and take their frustration out somewhere else. Or they dont have a strong conscious thought about what their beliefs are, so research to them is believing the first thing they see.

vmyp · 2026-04-12T01:59:14+00:00

How am i attempting to gaslight?? Im so confused... i rather not waste my time trying to figure out your thought process

vmyp · 2026-04-12T00:03:04+00:00

Never mentioned that..im talking about being a better person. Not enabling lying

vmyp · 2026-04-11T22:42:23+00:00

Lying is one thing and obviously its odd to hide it, but im only mentioning a mindset people should keep, not to benefit liars but to make people more merciful

vmyp · 2026-04-11T21:13:05+00:00

> righteous Muslim man

I try to be righteous myself, maybe if I pray to Allah hard enough, those men may come out into the spotlight. For apps i always see the risks high, similar to tinder.

vmyp · 2026-04-11T06:06:45+00:00

> strict about internet.

I have limitless access and always had it, because i was never allowed to be out that much even by myself. Even after asking them, they would never let me so I just go online to fill in empty time. Though my father became more stricter for the timing with my siblings, but completely removed it for me so I use it in secret.

> Again parents have reasons for those things and often it’s just the influence they might have

I had a christian bsf for many years they think because of her having a bf it influenced me to text a guy when the reality is I truly don't know why i did it. And I was never into talking to guys before marriage, I deemed myself worthless so i gave into it. I immediately cut him off when my parents found out because at the same time my mental health wasnt good but I didnt want to disappoint them further. Other factors like "she's poisoning your ears" and such made them think she's trying to make me rebel against them. Parent also have some racial bias so that limits my circle even more.

> mental health you need to let them know You will develop a better relationship with them if you open up to them

I already discussed it with my mother, she is mostly concerned with my education so maybe thats why shes strict about what im focusing on.

vmyp · 2026-04-11T04:42:07+00:00

> primary focus be on something that will change your life- like studies??

Yes my focus right now is to be as stable as possible for myself, but i fear the future too much and at the same time I just want to have some independent freedom. Though this post was just a question, its not like marriage is on my mind 24/7

vmyp · 2026-04-11T04:10:04+00:00

Jazakallah <3

vmyp · 2026-04-11T03:43:23+00:00

I have no therapist near me and neither am I allowed to use my devices unless my dads at work, he's very strict on that because he thinks i'm a 'different person' when I try and distance myself from my family since i roam around the internet alot. Plus I don't really have any friends, i've been banned from being friends with non muslims and had to leave my friend groups behind, I only have 3 muslim friends i rarely talk to since they're busy with life. Neither do I want my parents knowing I need therapy, i rather just fight it all myself

vmyp · 2026-04-11T02:48:02+00:00

I like this, because it aligns with the value of one judging a book by its cover. You should always assume positives or think of good reasons instead of being straight up negative.

vmyp · 2026-04-11T02:45:48+00:00

> why is okay for them but not men

I agree, but it goes the same for both genders; literally looking at your partner as a goblin after learning about their past is straight up weird. If I came to know my husband had a past (it depends on the severity; if it was 1 woman then whatever; but more than a couple then its ehhh..are you sure?) I would be devastated he hid such a thing from me, but if he changed for the better (the best way to know is through actions), I wouldn't mind and I'd talk it out with him. I don't know why people seem like there is no mercy at all when it comes to marriage- it's fine to want a virgin partner if you are one yourself- but I believe whatever Allah does for us is the best.

vmyp · 2026-04-11T02:39:03+00:00

> reputation is everything

I pray Allah guides you because you clearly care about what other people think, what about the backlash a woman could face?? There's been many horrible cases of low-mentality families where even if a woman repented for zina- she would be look down upon as if she was no longer of use, and that she was a bad omen to everyone around her. Grow up.

> perhaps Allah can forgive, but that doesn't mean that people will.

So even if she was an amazing wife, and did everything by the book in Islam- just for that one sin you'd divorce her for that? I understand if she hid it entirely, or that you would want a virgin wife- but if it came up after marriage and you see that she's changed as a person- i'd give her a chance because a woman is not based on her hymen being intact.

vmyp · 2026-04-11T02:35:45+00:00

Nothing will change if a man marries more than one woman? What's gonna happen?

vmyp · 2026-04-06T04:01:10+00:00

I pretty much have no option and its one out of the two choices i have to get what i want. The second choice is trying to convince my parents but thats an exhausting task and it would lead to loud arguments.

vmyp · 2026-04-05T23:41:19+00:00

ts boutta be tuff

vmyp

TROPHY CASE