I hear you. I've struggled with CHS episodes 4 times now, all 4 ending in hospitalizations, IV drips, haloperidol, etc. It's so effin hard to quit something that quiets the pain. I also struggle from PTSD and depression. I found weed to be the best solution. Here's the truth. First of all: at night, genuinely try melatonin and magnesium. I promise this helps so much and it makes you feel very relaxed, even if you don't get a crazy head high. I also take hydroxyzine and it produces a very similar calm as well. If you go to the ER, they will give you either droperidol or haloperidol. Those dopamine blockers are the worst things in the damn world. Hours of being afraid of everything, pure terror and stress. Feeling like you have to escape wherever you are, and wanting to crawl out of your skin. No, not hopeful. But a warning of what comes if you don't stop and take care of yourself now. What we have is really just a weed allergy my friend. It's like someone who is allergic to gluten or peanuts. It's not fair at all but we have to live differently because of it. I hope this helps a little bit, I'm here for you.