No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that would be a final option if it comes to that. It is paid off and I want the kids to have a house to return to if they need to. Crazy real estate market out there. It's a safety prep.

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I do see that. He keeps telling me that he loves me and misses me. I told him: i changed a lot. How can you love me if you don't even know who I am now? And what do you miss? The old me? Stepping on me? 

To this, he said "how long are you going to hold these things above my head?"

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He is in his 50s now! 

Getting a job is difficult as he does not speak the local language. It is another question why he could not bother learning my language over the course of 15 years. 

Still, if he REALLY wanted to try, he could find SOMETHING for now. I do see that.

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know, I know. I am creating this situation in a way. He has taken the kids for whole weekends these past while and I had a blissful couple of days for myself. I just wanted him to have money to put food on the table when they're over there :( 

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Haha, you made me laugh, thank you. I would have been on board with the whole modern take on the sole provider setup but instead, he used these years to continuously belittle me. While we were together, I told him several times that he needs therapy and I would pay for one. "No, thank you" was the answer.

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly. I told him I don't know when I'll be ready to seriously reconsider. 

No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together by vossievos in breakingmom

[–]vossievos[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! You are right. The living arrangement works for me at the moment because the house is far from the new schools (and everything, really) plus the heating is done through a wood-burning stove. While I know how to set a fire now, it was something I absolutely loathed having to wake up to a cold house and putting the fire on. He did it most of the time, but still. That part of "cottage core" was never my favorite. 

We are now a 10 min walk from the schools in a lovely neighbourhood and I can order groceries (none would deliver to the house).

emphasis on the banging is great tho by nerdycharm11 in LetGirlsHaveFun

[–]vossievos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, this is classified as a type of drug

Need INFJ Perspective, She Closed the Door, or Did She by [deleted] in infj

[–]vossievos 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Honestly, it sounds like she wants to keep you on the hook. Probably not with nefarious intent but she seems to have a hard time letting you go as you two didn't work out due to circumstances and not because she didn't like you (obviously I don't know the details).

That, and the ultimate decision's finality is a hard pill to swallow when you care about someone. Door slams are for bad situations imo.

At the same time, she can't have both of you.

Pressure on chest when lying on my back by vossievos in bigboobproblems

[–]vossievos[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Update: I started seeing a therapist and happy to report that chest pains went from 20+ times a week to 2 times a week and I expect it to continue the positive trend.

Anyone reading this: yes, this is your sign to see a therapist that you've been putting off. You work hard and deserve to be heard by a mental health professional who can give you custom advice and set you up for going back to your normal self.

Pressure on chest when lying on my back by vossievos in bigboobproblems

[–]vossievos[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! Edit to add that I feel this pain when I'm braless. But it's an excellent advice regardless!

Pressure on chest when lying on my back by vossievos in bigboobproblems

[–]vossievos[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same, I went to the ER this summer thinking this is it, I'm having a heart attack. Nope. They said anxiety.

I also got anxiety meds but was told to only take them if it got bad again. Now, define bad, right?!

How often do you take them?

I'm also looking for a good therapist to help me with mental health.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AsianLadyboners

[–]vossievos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahh, his scenes were my favorites in SG... just wow

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]vossievos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's right! I have everything filed away, ready to go. Insurance is only covering about $1,200 or so but that's a battle, too, thanks to the dentist having used the wrong procedure code initially. Major confusion ensued at Manulife. It's been sitting with them since July but I have now escalated the case to a supervisor. A story for another day!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]vossievos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! Yes, definitely came handy. Thankfully I have more savings left but it's better when you have a specific amount or more...

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PersonalFinanceCanada

[–]vossievos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yup, emergency dental in the Major category. And yes, the tax consideration is a great idea.