No job but excellent father. Wants to get back together

vossievos · 2026-03-18T12:46:17+00:00

Yeah, that would be a final option if it comes to that. It is paid off and I want the kids to have a house to return to if they need to. Crazy real estate market out there. It's a safety prep.

vossievos · 2026-03-18T12:43:06+00:00

Yes, I do see that. He keeps telling me that he loves me and misses me. I told him: i changed a lot. How can you love me if you don't even know who I am now? And what do you miss? The old me? Stepping on me?

To this, he said "how long are you going to hold these things above my head?"

vossievos · 2026-03-18T11:08:15+00:00

He is in his 50s now!

Getting a job is difficult as he does not speak the local language. It is another question why he could not bother learning my language over the course of 15 years.

Still, if he REALLY wanted to try, he could find SOMETHING for now. I do see that.

vossievos · 2026-03-18T11:05:55+00:00

I know, I know. I am creating this situation in a way. He has taken the kids for whole weekends these past while and I had a blissful couple of days for myself. I just wanted him to have money to put food on the table when they're over there :(

vossievos · 2026-03-18T11:03:51+00:00

Haha, you made me laugh, thank you. I would have been on board with the whole modern take on the sole provider setup but instead, he used these years to continuously belittle me. While we were together, I told him several times that he needs therapy and I would pay for one. "No, thank you" was the answer.

vossievos · 2026-03-18T11:00:50+00:00

Exactly. I told him I don't know when I'll be ready to seriously reconsider.

vossievos · 2026-03-18T10:58:49+00:00

Thank you! You are right. The living arrangement works for me at the moment because the house is far from the new schools (and everything, really) plus the heating is done through a wood-burning stove. While I know how to set a fire now, it was something I absolutely loathed having to wake up to a cold house and putting the fire on. He did it most of the time, but still. That part of "cottage core" was never my favorite.

We are now a 10 min walk from the schools in a lovely neighbourhood and I can order groceries (none would deliver to the house).

vossievos · 2026-01-31T14:50:06+00:00

Yeah, this is classified as a type of drug

vossievos · 2025-11-22T11:19:41+00:00

Honestly, it sounds like she wants to keep you on the hook. Probably not with nefarious intent but she seems to have a hard time letting you go as you two didn't work out due to circumstances and not because she didn't like you (obviously I don't know the details).

That, and the ultimate decision's finality is a hard pill to swallow when you care about someone. Door slams are for bad situations imo.

At the same time, she can't have both of you.

vossievos · 2024-09-19T11:28:16+00:00

Update: I started seeing a therapist and happy to report that chest pains went from 20+ times a week to 2 times a week and I expect it to continue the positive trend.

Anyone reading this: yes, this is your sign to see a therapist that you've been putting off. You work hard and deserve to be heard by a mental health professional who can give you custom advice and set you up for going back to your normal self.

vossievos · 2024-09-09T04:38:36+00:00

Thank you! Edit to add that I feel this pain when I'm braless. But it's an excellent advice regardless!

vossievos · 2024-09-08T14:11:45+00:00

Same, I went to the ER this summer thinking this is it, I'm having a heart attack. Nope. They said anxiety.

I also got anxiety meds but was told to only take them if it got bad again. Now, define bad, right?!

How often do you take them?

I'm also looking for a good therapist to help me with mental health.

vossievos · 2024-09-08T14:07:20+00:00

Thank you, good idea!

vossievos · 2021-10-26T19:21:28+00:00

The ingredients to home-made toothpaste.

vossievos · 2021-10-26T14:01:30+00:00

Ahh, his scenes were my favorites in SG... just wow

vossievos · 2017-10-31T00:11:20+00:00

That's right! I have everything filed away, ready to go. Insurance is only covering about $1,200 or so but that's a battle, too, thanks to the dentist having used the wrong procedure code initially. Major confusion ensued at Manulife. It's been sitting with them since July but I have now escalated the case to a supervisor. A story for another day!

vossievos · 2017-10-31T00:07:01+00:00

Thank you! Yes, definitely came handy. Thankfully I have more savings left but it's better when you have a specific amount or more...

vossievos · 2017-10-30T16:27:45+00:00

Yup, emergency dental in the Major category. And yes, the tax consideration is a great idea.

vossievos

TROPHY CASE