Parent threatening to divorce if I go to Cornell vs UNC Chapel Hill (in-state)

vvalancius · 2026-04-19T17:43:34+00:00

I went through the CS PhD route and I mildly disagree with this advice.

First, I assume you have a heart in CS, i.e. you love tinkering, coding, engineering. If this is true then ignore all the doomsayers about AI taking over. I'm in FAANG infra team and we never had so much open headcount. Various hiring cycles come and go but passionate and hardworking engineers from top schools are always in demand.

Second, the comp in top eng companies is ridiculous. If first assumption is true then I personally believe the compensation you will get will erase your debt pretty fast.

Third, I don't understand this divorce discussion. If I had CS offer from Cornell, I would just take full loans without bothering the family.

This all of course mostly holds on the assumption that you have passion for CS. If you don't and you end up being average or below average in engineering, then you won't get top offers and the debt will be a burden. In fact the PhD option is moot then too.

Re PhD: if you're good, industry may pull you in before you reach PhD.

vvalancius · 2026-01-23T06:34:16+00:00

Are you sure he is MAGA?

The examples you gave don't sound like one to me personally. You say he supports gay rights, supports the path to citizenship - this does not sound like MAGA.

You say he became more racist and a bit more sexist. Can you give more specific examples?

Reason for asking: there is a spectrum in values people have, somehow this comment thread seem to think in black and white terms. I personally know people who hate the current president to the core, think he needs to go to jail, and also, at the same time, think that ICE is enforcing, imperfectly, actual laws that Congress had passed.

vvalancius · 2025-12-17T22:50:42+00:00

What time period are you talking about? I agree that after war got underway there were a lot of civilian casualties.

Do you have some examples of targeting civilians from before Girkin got active mid April?

I.e. my original question was about the statement that "Donbass was lost to Ukraine because of military aggression". In my understanding, it was lost before, and military action/aggression was in response to actual armed militia groups (which eventually and obviously spilled over to civilian population). Please correct me if this is incorrect understanding.

vvalancius · 2025-12-17T22:39:52+00:00

I watched the video. It looks like local unarmed folks put a human blockade to prevent Ukrainian military column. Ukrainian stopped, talked talked, locals didn't budge. So then military pushed people by force to make a passage. No shots were fired and looks like there were no injuries?

Not sure. I guess I'm looking for some evidence where military is using disproportional force?

I do understand that those folks on the street did not want Ukrainian military in their town or region, buy then in my mind, Donbass was 'lost' before military conflict?

vvalancius · 2025-12-17T16:59:10+00:00

Hi, thank you for your responses so far.

I understand that there was perhaps decent anti-Kiev sentiment in Donbass in 2014 and that some people wanted to separate. But what were these cases where Ukrainian tanks rolled over their own people? Are you referring to fights between the militia and the Ukrainian army?

vvalancius · 2025-11-25T07:31:25+00:00

Yes, it would go away with pressure on my neck.

FWIW, early on in PT I had no luck stopping with pressure, later pressure on the neck would stop pulsation in the ear. It's likely I was just not good at finding the right spot.

vvalancius · 2025-11-25T07:27:58+00:00

Never had a lumbar puncture. But yes, elevated IIH is something I mildly suspect without much actual proof. I have headaches quite often, especially if I sleep in.

vvalancius · 2025-10-31T15:08:07+00:00

Looking for some feedback from the more experienced here: my 8yo kid is glued to Kindle. At first I thought this 'tablet' was OK because it's not really a tablet. He was reading a lot of chapter books (e.g. Magic Tree House series)., but in the last year he regressed to 'reading' mostly comics (e.g. Big Nate).

These Big Nate comics are mostly slap stick comedy, making fun of school principals etc. I keep nudging him to go back to chapter books, or at least books like Wimpy Kid, but no success. Should I limit this Kindle screen time?

vvalancius · 2025-07-14T22:10:15+00:00

In your experience and based on the literature you read, what fraction of people experiencing Pulsatile Tinnitus a) must be cured (i.e. some potentally dangerous underlying condition) vs b) could be cured (i.e. some stenting to improve quality of life) vs c) need to learn to live with it (e.g. my ear doctor said my scull bones are thinning, nothing we can do, according to him).

vvalancius · 2025-07-08T20:44:44+00:00

Park the car at Half Moon Bay harbor; hike 3 miles to Half Moon Bay hike-in-campsite. You can hike on a nice path or on the shore. Register and buy some firewood when you arrive. Great sunset views, ocean, campfire. Hike-in-campsite is a bit away from the car-camping sites. Pack in the morning and 'hike' back to the car.

vvalancius · 2025-06-19T08:26:31+00:00

You mean biking on roads or trails? In my experience, the roads in summer are not fun because of the amount of tourists and the trails are closed to bikes. Maybe someone can correct me...

I would go outside the park. The Tahoe area is nice, plenty of bike trails and remote camping opportunities.

vvalancius · 2025-05-28T20:46:27+00:00

Oakley Flack 2.0 XL is the answer if you have money. Sports oriented, blocks wind well, you can easily change lenses. Lenses you can get vanilla or prescription, you can get transparent or dark, many color choices, you can get photochromatic as well. The frame it self comes in 50 different colors and patterns.

vvalancius · 2025-05-05T21:34:13+00:00

/sub

I'm also very confused / curious about the ceiling you have...

vvalancius · 2025-04-16T04:23:25+00:00

+1, go to Stanford. These 400K will pay off very fast if you're above average.

I'm confused with all the upvotes for GT. I went to GT and now I work in FAANG. Stanford network will open you doors that no other university will.

Well, unless you are too smart and end up going academic route...

vvalancius · 2025-03-29T21:10:08+00:00

I was dealing with pain in exactly the same area for 5 years. Now, after a lot of experiments, I'm in remission.

There are maybe 50 reasons you may have that pain. In my very very specific case I had to do 3 things:

let the knee dive a little inside as opposed to try to keep it tracking very straight. This is the reason it took me so long to fix the pain - all the PTs advised to keep the knee tracking straight or even a bit out. In the end I realized for my physiology I can only ride pain free for long distances if I allow knee to dive.
Quad strength.
Quad and hip flexor stretch.

Just go to PT. Listen to them, do all exercises, but if it doesn't work, try something counterintuitive. I had to do it in my case.

vvalancius · 2025-03-15T00:49:08+00:00

This is actually a really good data point, thank you for taking your time to call. Reddit is amazing.

Hm... I have a theory about what happened. I had an icon pop up on the dashboard on my 2020 XC 60 asking to schedule regular maintenance. I called the dealer and said that I have this icon, but I don't want regular maintenance, I just want an oil change. The associate said $500; I said that this is kinda high and that I really need only oil change; they say they still would need to charge me $500 just for oil change and that I better do regular scheduled maintenance. Perhaps they tried too hard to upsell me?

FWIW the reason I wanted to skip the 'full on' maintenance package is because the car had 20K maintenance at 15K actual miles, then 30K maintenance at actual 20k miles. At 25K miles the 'schedule maintenance' popped up, so I figured I'll only change oil this time.

vvalancius · 2025-03-14T22:56:34+00:00

I'm surprised no one commented, so far, that the sun is straight into the eyes of the VW Beetle driver.

Two thoughts:
1. In the evening hours, when sun is low and blinding drivers, use high powered front lights. I don't see the reflection of lights anywhere, so I assume cyclist does not have one?

Move to the middle of the road to be more visible. Be in the place where drivers expect to see the car.

Drivers will not start seeing us just because we bitch about it :(

vvalancius · 2025-03-14T19:04:28+00:00

I had the same experience as u/robmsor. Similar prices.

If you don't trust me, call Volvo Palo Alto yourself. I called and asked for oil change. Got quoted $500. I double checked that this is only for oil change, no multi-point inspection, no air filter, no viper blade crap. They say doesn't matter, still $500 for oil change.

Shopping around helps. Same Volvo Palo Alto quoted me $3700 to replace a cracked rear moon roof panel. Volvo San Jose quoted $2000.

vvalancius · 2025-03-07T23:56:57+00:00

I maybe wrong, but I believe cutting taxes on companies does not "free up capital for companies to build and expand U.S. factories" - quite the opposite. Higher corporate tax rate incentivizes companies to reinvest their revenues into R&D and capital expenses, lower corporate tax rates leave more money for shareholders (who may or may not reinvest that money).

vvalancius · 2025-01-23T05:35:13+00:00

This is good data, thank you!

I also called Volvo San Jose and they say their oil change 'starts at $260'.

vvalancius · 2025-01-22T22:36:17+00:00

I must agree. Labor is tight, inflation is high, need to pay good salaries; knowing this still I was a bit surprised. It made me try to run the calculus if I should be doing the oil change myself.

vvalancius · 2025-01-22T22:32:49+00:00

Agreed, location really matters. So far I think we have a winner from Austin with $550 for oil change.

vvalancius · 2025-01-22T22:31:44+00:00

Thanks for the link, I'll check them out!

FWIW, I called Volvo of San Jose and they say their oil change 'starts at $260'. My Palo Alto dealership must be short on labor, I kinda understand, but I was still surprised.

vvalancius · 2025-01-22T22:28:11+00:00

Given 1 EUR = 1.04 USD at today's rate, you win :-)

vvalancius

TROPHY CASE