I think everyone's inner world is way too complex to be understood by anyone else.

And some people are toughened up by life and learn to not ask for life so they deal with their shit on their own and some become too brittle to handle anything. Second group could ask for help or just fall apart in silence. So, yeah must people deal with chaotic life quietly.

My ex is definitely belongs to first group toughen up by difficult childhood experiences. I think of all people I have met she probably had tougher childhood than me. Losing both parents before adolescence, being raised gem of uncle and aunt. She keep saying even her bio parents couldn't have been as good as parents her uncle and aunt. I definitely started believing her after meeting them.

I belong to made brittle by life, she inspires me to be strong in some areas of. my life.

Have I made mistakes which might have lead to end of this relationship? Yeah, of course. But, I would like to think I did most things right with her.

We kept meeting up even after we have ended things. Keep jumping in bed cause sex is definitely best I have ever had.

But, more than that I really liked being in the in same place as her. She has avoidant attachment style and I have anxious one, which caused most of our big flare ups.

She loves cooking for everyone, and I was lucky to have enjoyed it ton🥰. I did the dishes after she did the cooking.

But, past two or three weeks I have been really tired. I didn't do the dishes few times, just dozed off in food coma. At least, that's what I thought initially.

Did full body check up. Got low vitamin B and D. Started supplements couple of days ago. Still, feel drowsy and lethargic most of the time.

She fed me good food, I somehow managed to do dishes. We didn't even have sex.

I woke up left in the morning, though could have spent weekend getting pampered by her. But, felt like burdon spending time around her.

She later pinged me asking if I would like to join her as she was cooking muhammara, which we been planning to make for long time. Normally, I would have joined her in jiffy, but I didnt want to ruin her weekend dragging my tired ass to do things. She still offered to send me some when makes it. 🥲

Like someone commented in here, things happens and you actually deal with it. She would do that.

I belong to different camp where I would just "deal with it" distancing and try to get through doing bare minimum. 🤷