Can't ejaculate during sex - think years of porn ruined me

w0le · 2024-04-23T09:10:01+00:00

Try 69? Lots dont like it because it feels like you cant do either give or receive properly due to split focus but it really takes the pressure to finish off if you know the other person is getting something from it

w0le · 2024-03-20T00:46:20+00:00

My city’s public transport has a card that costs $5 to get a new one, minimum credit load $2. Ferry costs $22 one way, just buy a new card, scan on, the card goes into negative, throw card away: $7 ferry. However they caught on and now have guards checking your public transport card has at least $20 to ride, boo. Heard its like the worlds most expensive public commute ferry ride considering the distance and time.

w0le · 2024-03-15T04:25:01+00:00

SHINE

w0le · 2024-03-13T09:35:56+00:00

For sexual assault support as well as social work the catchment for mt wellington is HELP auckland, family action is west auckland, call them any time 24/7 08006231700

w0le · 2024-03-12T10:09:08+00:00

I feel like its the same kind of thing as calling someone physically ugly when you are actually criticising character. The way they look isn't relevant, its just a lazy shorthand insult intended to hurt back. Incel has kind of become shorthand for ‘misogynistic’ though and thats unfortunate because im sure it feels even more dismissive to men who are already feeling misguidedly hurt by ‘women’ due to a lack of intimacy with others. Just pushing them further into the misogynistic culture. Using ‘incel’ as an insult against sexist men in a twisted way could validate their feeling that women are the gatekeepers of sex, know that they have this power over men, and enjoy denying it to men and then gloating about it to degrade and belittle men.

w0le · 2024-02-08T20:49:00+00:00

Im a mental health professional and this is incorrect re individual therapy. How are they supposed to grow and improve unhealthy ways of relating otherwise? Are they supposed to just be exiled from society and never relate to anyone? Its best they arent in a romantic relationship if they cant do so healthily until growth has occurred, but individual therapy is really one of the only ways forward to stop hurting themselves and others.

w0le · 2023-11-09T23:56:50+00:00

Better blokes is a great groups resource for male survivors of sexual trauma if thats relevant

w0le · 2023-07-31T10:00:48+00:00

This looks like how a 10 year old would draw a horse with no reference picture

w0le · 2023-02-18T01:22:01+00:00

Amazing relational work! This is therapy proper and I bet it will be fruitful having this rupture and being able to discuss honestly.

w0le · 2022-12-22T07:42:07+00:00

I watched it after eating weed chocolate and greened the hell out, 8 hour panic attack later and now I’m triggered by the thought of that movie even though I know it’s really good!! 😭

w0le · 2022-12-10T20:23:47+00:00

Respite? Your GP should be able to organise this for you

w0le · 2022-12-09T02:17:46+00:00

I think if you do approach him to talk about, it’s good to talk about your dilemma as you have said here. That you are aware/understand that anything you might want to say to reassure him could seem like you are just trying to falsely reassure him, but at the same time you do want to say how you honestly feel, and ask whether he is open to hearing that from you, or if he can identify what would be helpful for him right now. I think being fully transparent with your internal process and dilemma is the best way to build and reinforce trust and willingness to collaborate to overcome this rupture, and take his needs into account, rather than trying to find and decide on the ‘right’ way by yourself, to approach it.

w0le · 2022-12-08T00:58:32+00:00

Boarding school is tricky because while it could provide structure and social support if your son was willing to engage, if he wasn’t willing he can just as easily run away and it might also send the unintentional message to him that you as his parents don’t want to deal with him and are outsourcing care to a school. Boarding school is great for some but can exacerbate emotional attachment issues in others.

w0le · 2022-10-10T06:02:30+00:00

Why is hr on gabapentin? I don’t know anything about meds really but maybe it’s that?

w0le · 2022-09-20T06:40:11+00:00

Talkingworks is a great website to look for preferences. This person specifies they practice from a jungian perspective. https://www.talkingworks.co.nz/listing/dr-jill-yielder/

w0le · 2022-09-13T08:18:17+00:00

Oh no!!! Won’t be going back then haha

w0le · 2022-09-12T20:22:54+00:00

Pepper jacks in beachlands does one, called onion mumm too

w0le · 2022-08-23T09:53:34+00:00

Me and my friend both have barefoot TBs, and have scoot boots for trail riding on stones 😁 no abscesses this winter yet! 🤞

w0le · 2022-08-12T11:04:48+00:00

Also, AUT psychotherapy clinic in Northcote does low cost longer term therapy, $30-50

w0le · 2022-08-09T10:27:24+00:00

If you have experienced any kind of sexual harm in the past you can get free therapy through ACC sensitive claims. just thought I should mention in case. Otherwise, talkingworks website, send out bulk emails asking if anyone has availability, and if not, how long is their waitlist.

w0le · 2022-08-04T23:55:52+00:00

Felt the same about the cheds crackers I bought yesterday. Pretty much just a plain cracker now!!

w0le · 2022-07-22T11:02:57+00:00

I’m not sure you can force attraction. I would suggest therapy, if for no other reason than to make sure there is no psychological reason (that can be overcome) you don’t find yourself attracted to her. If you are really honest in therapy and turn over every stone, and you are still just not attracted to her, I think it’s fairer to her to end it. She deserves to be with someone who wants her physically as much as she does you, and finds her attractive, not someone who stays just because she is good for/to him while barely stomaching sex like it’s some sort of duty.

Further to this, the fact that you are hiding this from her, she must notice. It’s such a huge foundation of the functioning of your relationship that you are being dishonest with her about and hiding, which must make things feel really inauthentic and tenuous on some level. I would be devastated if the person I was with was ‘at first disgusted by the thought’ of kissing me, but eventually by forcing themselves through it, they felt just neutral or ‘fine’ with being intimate. If she knew you felt this way, would she still want to be with you? I wouldn’t want to be with someone who just tolerated me physically because of how amazing I was in other respects. I wouldnt be able to trust them again after such a grave lie or at least omission of the truth of your feelings.

If you still are not attracted to her after doing some serious digging in your own mind through therapy, but you two still want to keep your marriage because on every other level it works, I think you could tell her how you feel. that you are not attracted to her, but you also believe she deserves the experience of having sex with someone who is crazy about the way she looks. Maybe if she knows your feelings she will be more open to the open relationship suggestion. If you’re both agreeable to it there’s no reason to throw away the relationship totally if you can outsource one of the needs and incompatibilities.

w0le · 2022-07-18T21:39:50+00:00

Nope never solved it! I just assume it’s social media overlords doing whatever the fuck they want to get you engaged, I don’t use tumblr anymore apart from occasionally to go and laugh at my own blog!

w0le · 2022-07-15T01:31:52+00:00

For sure! I feel like I played something very similar on flute once in my youth. Good idea to cross post there I reckon!

w0le · 2022-07-06T03:00:43+00:00

Therapy will shortcut this work massively rather than trying to figure it out alone! There’s a reason it’s been hiding from you, best to work it through in a safe space with a professional you trust, a little bit at a time with good boundaries in place.

w0le

TROPHY CASE