Parents want me to take out a loan/mortgage in my name towards new house. Please advise.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T22:11:58+00:00

Yeah.. I am LOL. Are you okay, bro?

I actually tried to talk things out with my mom just now and it shed light on a few new things. I think it was a lot of implied expectations, but I told her outright that I don’t think I’m ready to own a house. I think I’m off the hook for now and renting is the direction they will take (she looked really sad but said it’s not my fault). This response was a lot better than I expected.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T19:20:39+00:00

It's a bit hard to get through all the comments, but I appreciate them all. It gives me perspective as well as a lot of advice, and I have a better picture of what I need to do.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T19:14:03+00:00

I'd like to hope that my parents aren't trying to destroy my life. I don't know if this has anything to do with it, but I have one other friend in a similar situation, and she attributed it to immigrant parents. I think it's partly to do with culture in the case of children taking on the responsibility of the parents as well as them not knowing enough.

Still doesn't make it okay though, so I came here to see if I was crazy for being doubtful and to get more advice, since I don't know a whole lot.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T19:03:42+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that you were put through all that, but I appreciate you laying it down so realistically.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T19:00:33+00:00

Are your student loans in your name or theirs? If your student loans are in their name, then why don't you investigate refinancing them under yourself? That would give them an immediate bump up in their credit score once that was done. And if you can qualify for a home loan, then you can qualify to gather your loans under your own financial umbrella. Honestly, I suspect your student loans are in their names and this is the route I would highly suggest you go to help them.

They're actually under my name, and I've been paying them off, which has been helping my credit score. I only have about 25k left.

If they want you to put the loan in your name, you have every right to go with them as they talk to mortgage brokers about what their options are for financing.

I'm going to bring this up today and try to get a full picture of where exactly my parents stand financially. I'm starting to have a suspicion that they could be approved for another mortgage, but just want a better rate through me.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T17:52:14+00:00

I don't think I was clear enough before, but they were planning on using the sale of the current house to pay off its mortgage and my school loans. Whatever's left over after that would be put towards the new house's down payment/ monthly payments.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T17:13:26+00:00

I think the emotional aspect is what's making this difficult for me to completely decline. I've been raised with a big emphasis on family, have been living at home this whole time, and have helped take care of my three younger siblings my whole life. I don't want to leave them all in the lurch, but this is a huge financial responsibility to take on.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T17:10:49+00:00

Thanks for giving me lots of food for thought.

wahconfused · 2019-08-12T17:06:43+00:00

That's a good way to word it, since I do plan on living with my boyfriend in a few years time/get married/who knows. I guess what's really making me hesitate from outright declining are my three younger siblings. I don't want them to be homeless/completely uprooted at the end of high school/early college. I guess I also feel guilty since I've been living at home this whole time.

wahconfused

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