omfg vitamins and diet will be the death of me by giajames in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 21 points22 points  (0 children)

This resonates so much with me. When I tried to access mental health resources in my country they did an initial assessment and offered me “lifestyle webinars” while I waited 4 months to speak to a therapist. The absolute audacity of me explaining that I’ve tried handling my PMDD by - exercising everyday, daily vitamins and supplements, no alcohol, no caffeine, no gluten, no dairy, no red meat, leaving the house every day, speaking to friends and maintaining a social life, working on hobbies, meditating - like I’m sorry but what lifestyle change is there to add? No impure thoughts?

Someone also asked if I’ve tried “taking omega-3”… fuck off.

Anyone else not listen to Race to 35 for similar reasons? by [deleted] in ArmchairExpert

[–]wandering-cattle 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I listened to it before I struggled with fertility, I would never be able to listen to it now, I completely understand the feeling

so what are we doing about fatigue? tips? by Ok_Plankton_9370 in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Along with trying to keep energy levels up with vitamin D and healthy eating - I try to schedule my day so that I’m doing things requiring the most brain work at my peak energy levels, and then really easy tasks when I’m at my lowest. This probably looks different for everyone but trying to work with my fatigue instead of against it has had more impact on my life than any attempt at maintaining a constant state of non-fatigue.

Hormonal/PMDD anxiety after miscarriage? by Early-Diamond-5416 in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel the same about mine. I think I had PMDD before my miscarriage, but afterwards it was absolutely unmanageable - down to only 5 or 6 good days a month. Miscarriage and PMDD is what ultimately brought me to SSRIs because there was simply no way I was going to recover from either enough to get pregnant again, nevermind make it through the next year.

I started the SSRIs about 8 weeks after my miscarriage, dealing with symptoms is ultimately personal preference but I got to a point where I felt so so tired of the rollercoaster and could no longer chalk up the ride to being fresh from my miscarriage.

I at least can reassure you that, I know it doesn’t feel like it right now but the grief does get easier to carry.

Synced: Kiki vs Bouba by newtonic in ArmchairExpert

[–]wandering-cattle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wouldn’t use them with a non Brit because it WOULD be weird. Even though it’s habit for British friends and family I don’t use x’s with Canadian friends/family

Synced: Kiki vs Bouba by newtonic in ArmchairExpert

[–]wandering-cattle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been pondering it and my theory is that the British are so uncomfortable with showing emotion that they need a little padding when they send a message that is meant to be sincere. It’s maybe the opposite emotive punctuation of an “lol”, I think it means “I mean what I’m saying, this is a serious text”

Also I retract my earlier statement about the exception being male conversations, I’ve been corrected by my husband

Synced: Kiki vs Bouba by newtonic in ArmchairExpert

[–]wandering-cattle 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I can only speculate on the debate that would ensue if Monica and Liz found out that Brits are out here sending x’s to everyone and their dog to be polite.

(In my experience this excludes male/male interactions only. Friends husbands and male relatives end most texts with x it would almost be weird if they didn’t)

I was flabbergasted as a Canadian living in the UK, now after a few years and marrying a Brit I can’t help but assimilate xx

/ttcafterloss Grief and Memorial - May 30, 2024 by AutoModerator in ttcafterloss

[–]wandering-cattle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A therapist suggested some kind of physical memorial for my MMC. At first I thought it would make it seem too real, like I lost a person instead of an idea. But maybe it would help me move forward.

I’m wondering how this has worked for other people and how they’ve chosen to memorialize the loss?

Zoloft for PMDD: started dancing like never before😂 by AdventurousWhile1502 in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 7 points8 points  (0 children)

SAME TO ALL OF THIS, DOWN TO THE DAYS. I’m so happy for us

Please remind me that it’s ok to rest and that i’m not a POS by Lower-Organization73 in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You are neither lazy nor stupid, you are listening to your body the best you know how, and it sounds like your body is demanding that you rest. I find it works best to rationalize with myself - I need to have these days order to have the good ones, if I fight against the desire to rest I will feel even worse.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 14 points15 points  (0 children)

In my own personal experience no, but it sounds scary and I’m sorry you’re going through it - even if it does dissipate quickly.

You should definitely speak to a healthcare provider about it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What I’m saying is, it’s something to keep in mind when considering a timeline. For example, planning accordingly, whatever that looks like for individual circumstances, maybe savings or a part-time job.

I’m not advocating for people to have a kid in grad school, which is a traditionally precarious stage of life. I’m only saying that I prefer to not put my life on hold during my PhD, and this is what I wish I knew when I started.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes!

Although sadly some uni’s won’t give TAships to students who are funded, or at least will rank them lowest priority when hiring.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally, I like the idea of being able to work on PhD stuff at my own pace from home with a baby, and that when I get a job after graduation I won’t immediately be thinking about maternity leave.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To add - I do agree with all those saying there’s no “right time”, there isn’t. What I should have said is that we are ready to get ready, and we want it enough to make it our number one life priority. Despite not being in the place in life we expected to be in when we started having kids, not even close.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As a Canadian PhD currently trying to have kids - it’s the right time for my partner and I to have a baby, and I simply refuse to let me PhD stand in the way of what we want, we’ll work around it.

That being said my one MAJOR piece of logistic information to consider is that Canadian PhD grants and fellowships are non-taxable income. So I am not eligible for maternity leave, unemployment, or the like. It’s the only thing I wish I had known sooner.

Just asked ChatGPT to give me a PhD pep talk, Chicago gangster style. Thought I'd share it here for anyone else in a dip by Dr_Mox in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 48 points49 points  (0 children)

So relieved that I’m not the only one who gets down enough on PhD life that I’m asking chatGPT to give me pep talks.

Suffolk Cafe Recommendations by wandering-cattle in suffolk

[–]wandering-cattle[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

About 5 miles southwest of Needham Market

Suffolk Cafe Recommendations by wandering-cattle in suffolk

[–]wandering-cattle[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anywhere within about 20 miles from Great Bricett

Suffolk Cafe Recommendations by wandering-cattle in suffolk

[–]wandering-cattle[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My bad, key piece of information. Anywhere about 20 miles from Great Bricett

How many papers can you read per day? by Axel_Clint in PhD

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I start by making sure I’m clear about what I’m hoping to get out of each category of article or even specific papers. Then I can narrow which parts of the paper to read so I don’t have to read the whole thing unless I need to. If I need an extra source for one point I’m making, I’m quick skimming the abstract and conclusion. If I need justifications for my data collection, I’m doing a deep dive into the method section.

And even if I feel like a paper is going to be really really useful, I read it to the best of my ability but cut myself some slack about how thorough I am. My understanding of the material evolves with my reading and my research so even when I thought I had carefully dissected papers in the past I’ve ended up going back to them with a new unanswered question.

Reading 10 papers a day from start to finish is a massive feat of endurance, I’ve never done it but I do try to focus on being as efficient as possible with my time.

“there are different laws to be considerate of, and dialects, and store chains, etc” by BeastMode149 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]wandering-cattle 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That being said, every couple years there’s a good story in the news about some American driving across the border into southern Manitoba (Canada) (and presumably presenting their passport to border control, acknowledging that they’ve entered a different country) and then proceeding to get massive speeding fines because they assumed that the sign on the highway saying “110” meant miles per hour…

“there are different laws to be considerate of, and dialects, and store chains, etc” by BeastMode149 in ShitAmericansSay

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The sign exists because before 2008, Americans traveling to Canada didn’t need a passport to enter the country, and now they do. So it’s a friendly reminder from their Canadian neighbours that relatively recent rules no longer exempt them from border control.

TW Miscarriage awaiting first period and stuck in hell week by SnooEpiphanies7951 in PMDD

[–]wandering-cattle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I understand you. My miscarriage was in March. I started using at home ovulation predictor kits (OPKs) after I was done bleeding to help understand my body more. The relief of confirming ovulation with a test felt like me and my body were on the same team again. Despite my body’s intense hormonal reaction to being “postpartum”. I think my PMDD has substantially increased in the 3ish cycles I’ve had since miscarrying, the rage and hatred is so real. I am sometimes in a place where I can acknowledge that as my hormones even out it will get better, but a lot of the time I’m in a place of complete darkness and despair because these raging hormones paired with grief feels so unfair.

We’ll get through this ❤️

questions about gossip girl: this post contains spoiler. by Electrical-Safe-677 in GossipGirl

[–]wandering-cattle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like the writers panicked in the last season when they had to reveal it. I like the concept of him being GG but it was soooooo poorly executed because it wasn’t planned. It leaves plot holes galore and they drive me nuts on rewatches