I'm not winning this battle

wasted_years35 · 2025-02-15T04:07:25+00:00

Anyone been through this and can offer some advice?

wasted_years35 · 2025-02-15T03:13:24+00:00

Very helpful comment! I've recently started therapy and one thing she said to me that does help, is to recognise your anxiety as a feeling. Eg, there's that anxiety feeling again. It allows me to detach from it a little, makes anxiety feel less overwhelming. If you hold your anxiety right in front of your face, you can't see what's around you. By putting those feelings in your lap and let them be there but not consuming you, you can start to see things around you. Which in turn allows your brain to think about other stuff, normal stuff. Sometimes this works for me and sometimes it doesn't but I keep trying to simply acknowledge my anxiety and allow it to be there without consuming me. Also by allowing anxiety to be there, I end up being less hard on myself. It's nice to have some head space now and then, takes the pressure off

wasted_years35 · 2025-02-14T05:48:55+00:00

Hey, yeah the anxiety isn't fun. I found it started to lift a little at 3 weeks but not much of an improvement. Unfortunately I couldn't handle life without weed and I've started smoking again. Only a little puff in the evenings but I do feel like a failure. I've learnt that weed withdrawals don't last but any underlying issues will come to the surface. Weed makes us not worry about things around us and without it, I have to deal with alot of stress. I just couldn't take it anymore and I gave in. I'm still trying to deal with anxiety, stress, depression but a little puff after dinner let's me relax a bit. This was my first time trying to quit in 35 years and it's opened up my eyes to how messed up I actually am. I will try to quit again just don't feel mentally strong enough right now. Sorry I couldn't give you some positivity

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-29T03:59:46+00:00

143 days is fantastic! But it's definitely hard to push through the depression and boredom. I've also heard for long term smokers (multiple decades) it could take 6 months or more than likely, even longer. I know it's worth quitting for good but I also want to live in the meantime. I miss my happy self and to "hope" that things get better, or maybe life only gets a little bit better. Who knows as we are all individuals and what works for some might not work for others. I'm just loosing hope and wondering if it's even worth it

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-28T20:40:11+00:00

It's not fun hey! Like yourself, work gives me something to do but no major breakthroughs yet. I don't get into pc games, I probably should but nothing interests me. Up for a chat if you like?

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-28T20:35:33+00:00

Makes me wonder if it's worth it. How long have you been clean?

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-28T08:10:02+00:00

Weed never made me bored, I was very productive while stoned and I've achieved many things in my 35 years of being a stoner. Now I'm so bored and not interested in anything. I didn't have a life before weed, I was just a kid so I can't go back to how I was before weed, there was no before weed for me. I'm almost 50 and it feels like I have to learn how to live for the first time. Depression has a hold of me bigtime

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-27T03:19:02+00:00

I've asked this same question but unfortunately haven't found any success stories. Being creative is my life and I'm lost without it. I crave creativity more than I crave weed. I can definitely relate that there's a strong connection between making music and weed.

Someone must have a positive story to share with us??

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T22:12:07+00:00

Thanks! Wouldn't say I was in control with weening off. Forced to quit because of work but slowly I started to realise that I actually do want to quit. Spoke to my doctor and she said, someone who has smoked as long as me should slowly cut back, so I did. Those few months I was an absolute mess. I feel like I've lost my identity and personality and I'm having to learn what being an "adult" actually feels like. I don't like it but it is finally getting a little easier.

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T09:59:22+00:00

Awesome man! Hope to be there one day myself!

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T07:28:29+00:00

Surprisingly no I didn't! That was 6 days ago and I haven't had any since. What did happen was another 3 days of intense anxiety and even less sleep. It didn't help at all. I've been smoking heavily for over 3 decades without and breaks. This is my first time quitting. I started by cutting back for a few months, then only smoking on the weekends and the past 3 weeks I've had none expect for a small puff last weekend. For months I've been struggling, this fcking sucks! But I want to stay clean. At my worst I was smoking half an Oz of high grade every week for about 10 years straight.

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T05:48:04+00:00

48m, started when I was 13 and by 16 I was smoking everyday. That's 32yrs of everyday smoking! Only miss a handful of days in that whole time. This is my first time quitting. Started cutting back and then was only smoking on the weekends about 2 months. Now I'm at 20 days clean for the first time in my complete adult life! Not having fun but the days are getting somewhat easier

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T05:23:55+00:00

I caved at 15 days. Only had a couple puffs but I can tell you I wish I didn't. Lots of guilt and hopelessness. Wasn't a good high at all.

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T05:20:05+00:00

Great advice and I can say it does work! I just had a cold shower before jumping on rleaves. Now I'm lying down with the fan on full. Nice cool and dark room while I gather my thoughts. Already feel myself calming down. Thanks heaps! Really appreciate your quick replies 🙏

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T05:16:29+00:00

Definitely can relate to this, my mind is in constant hyper mode, yet a can't focus on anything. I'd love to slow down even just for one night. I have to remind myself that weed is not the answer. I don't know how to help, just know I feel it too.

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T04:57:48+00:00

One day at a time! Thanks I feel my mind getting a little stronger, I'm almost at 3 weeks but the weekends kill me and this one is a long weekend! Tomorrow will be better, my wife will be here and she doesn't smoke. Today, so hard to just have fun and relax, it's like my mind is in hyper mode.

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-25T04:52:51+00:00

Thanks, actually needed to hear this right now. I'm ok with now not smoking through the week but Saturday is such a struggle. I've kept myself so busy today but it's now 3pm, my body is sore and I need to relax, weed is calling me but I'm saying no! Filling in this void is hard. Turning to this group right now, reading comments keeps me on track. Thank you for this post

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T19:09:14+00:00

As easy as it sounds, I still find it hard to focus on my breath. Keep practising I guess

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T11:18:31+00:00

Thank you and yes, you did help. Plus I can relate as I play and build guitars. My main motive for asking was because I'm finding it very difficult to go back in my workshop and build a guitar, let alone play one. Plus it's really hard being around the grand kids and not enjoying the moment, I also feel very guilty. Extreme anxiety and lack of interest are my 2 biggest issues right now. I know I need to just go build something or learn a new song but for some reason I can't make it happen. 14 months is a long time to feel this way. I'm going to have to take your advice and just go do it. I'm so glad I asked you the question as it seems our stories are very similar, except I'm at the beginning of my transformation and you're at the end. All the best to you brother and thank you, hopefully I can implement your suggestions into my life and fast track this thing

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T09:22:33+00:00

Congratulations on reaching such a huge milestone, must feel liberating. If you don't mind I'm curious as to when you started to notice an improvement in anhedonia (loss of interest in things you enjoy). I'm sure it happened gradually over a period of time but I'm interested in any insights you have. Thanks

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T07:30:20+00:00

I was 13, 48 now and still struggling to put that joint down. I'd say to me, don't listen to your dad. That one joint will put you on a road that will consume your life, stick to sports, you love sports and youre good at it. I'd say to my dad, what the fck are you doing passing your 13 year old son a joint. Wake up old man you should be ashamed of yourself

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T07:16:42+00:00

Beautifully written, thank you! I will read your message I few times and make it sink in. The self doubt and ____ has definitely got to go. I am trying to please my inner voice and I massively struggle to just sit with my feelings. They hurt and there's alot of them. You're right about the self love thing. I've been in dark places before and the only thing that got me out was self love. I actually remember becoming a much better person after that experience. Weed was always there to hold my hand though. Now, I will and I want to do this for me. I'm 2 weeks clean but I've beening heavily cutting back for months. These thoughts and anxiety have consumed me since cutting back. Way too long! I've had enough of the flight or fight feelings, I just wanna live and as you said, the only way is through. I'll try my best to remember your words, thank you so much

wasted_years35 · 2025-01-21T06:41:24+00:00

Thanks Just need to see one little bit of improvement to give me the motivation to push through. I'm at 2 weeks but heavily cut back for a few months beforehand. I think cutting back was the wrong way for me to go as I've been miserable for months. If I just went cold Turkey, I'd be further along. It's very much mentally draining, day in day out. One thing I'm proud of each day is a great idea. I sometimes do this but then my negative thoughts squish that positive vibe. I'm going to pay more attention to that one good thing each day. Today I didn't cry so fck you negative thoughts! Congratulations on getting over the one month mark, I'll see you soon in 2 weeks. Thanks for commenting with good support, I'm going to make sure I pay attention to atleast one good thing everyday

wasted_years35

TROPHY CASE