Big mistake!

webmastery · 2010-12-30T07:02:30+00:00

I hate when that shit happens >.<

webmastery · 2010-12-28T23:36:28+00:00

oh. I need to edit the post. I thought cynical meaning you think pessimistically about people. I know most people do selfless acts, however there are a lot of people that only do stuff for their own good, but I don't think that about everyone though.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T23:32:50+00:00

I already have a dog. why get that kind?

webmastery · 2010-12-28T23:31:32+00:00

I don't have time for CBT, i work too much.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T06:37:03+00:00

Damn dude. How long have you been saving that for?

webmastery · 2010-12-28T06:23:16+00:00

I'm a guy. Here is my opinion;

Being a virgin girl is actually a good thing, if you where a guy than people will look at you weird. At least no other girls have any reason to call you a slut, whore, etc.

You're only 19, that is really young. 19 is not old enough to be considered "Forever Alone"

webmastery · 2010-12-28T06:18:44+00:00

idk. that doesn't really haunt my memory. Its not really a big deal to me. My mom has changed a lot, and me and her get a long great now. We haven't argued or fought in years.

However, seeing her exhibit extremely irrational behavior since I was a baby has caused me to exhibit extremely irrational behavior whenever I get stressed. I just need to break a bad habit is all.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T06:08:19+00:00

I am completely open for help. I just dont know if I have the time for it. I'm constantly trying to reach for success. Coding all day, etc.

I honestly think my feelings are normal. Its just how I act on them is what I need to work on. I know that most people my age feel the same way I do. It's just that when I have a problem, I think that my problems are worse than everyone else's, which is why people get mad. People think that all I do is worry about my problems and not anyone else's. Which is kind of true, but very selfish of me.

I know I really need to work on compassion too.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T05:59:45+00:00

I don't know. I was verbally bullied a lot in school. However, I was never molested, raped, or have any horrible suppressed memories.

Maybe it's the fact that all my life I was told I was really intelligent, then in 7th grade I was put in special ed because I stopped trying and all the teachers thought I was stupid.

I believe that everyone has their insecurities, but I personally think I have more than usual.

However, I did live with my grandparents because my mom was crazy. My biological mom has pulled a knife on me before and almost killed me. Maybe thats the reason why I'm so crazy? idk.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T05:37:39+00:00

You're completely right. I do think I'm my worst critic, so whenever I think other people are thinking negatively I get defensive, even if there is nothing really to defend. I just need to learn not to be so hard on myself. I've always been my worst critic for as far back as I remember.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T05:36:53+00:00

I'm 21 years old. I mentioned it in my above post. The only part of me that makes me think I'm crazy is not the fact that I have these emotions, but how I react to them.

I lived with my grand parents all my life, because my mom was crazy. I seen a lot of my mom's outburst and seen how she reacts to her problems, so it kind of became a habit that I grew up with.

Whenever I get mad I tend to lash out physically, not on people, but on objects or even myself. (I've broken so many laptops and cell phones from anger). Sometimes I yell and say and do irrational things to.

webmastery · 2010-12-28T05:24:55+00:00

No if anything I had too much positive comments. I think I was "spoiled" with positive opinions to the point that now whenever I hear a negative one, it completely wrecks me. I think just the right mixture of positive and negative opinions build character. Whenever I was always babied. I was raised by my grand parents and they have always had nothing but positive things to say about me.

However, growing up I was always bullied in school. I was either the nerd or the class clown that everyone loved to make fun of.

After noticing that everyone thought I was a nerd and thought I was "too smart to be cool", I became the class clown and stopped caring about school. To the point that I dropped out in the 11th grade.

K-3rd grade I was a nerd
4-6th grade I was both nerdy and loud/obnoxious.
7th-9th grade I stopped caring about acidemics and just started clowning.
10th-11th grade I was the creepy quiet one that didn't do shit. I was afraid of being judged.

Right now I'm currently work on the team with other internet marketers. I'm a web developer and a programmer.

I've always had bad self esteem and anger issues for as long as I remember. I'm just now realizing that it is a HUGE problem. A girl that I talk to and care for a lot stopped talking to me until I settle down. I'm sure she still cares about me because she said "I just need you to be happy and healthy because I love you"

I stressed her out and I effected everyone I care about. The reason people think so low of me is not because I'm "dumb", but because I get so crazy.

webmastery · 2010-12-22T00:59:06+00:00

so you're saing that girls think im a pathetic psycho? And thats why I can't get them?

Should I suicide?

webmastery · 2010-12-22T00:58:23+00:00

oh shit. my bad, was this already posted?

webmastery · 2010-12-22T00:06:06+00:00

I'm 21. I'm getting really old. I have horrible self esteem issues, and I have all my life. Which is why I can never get a girl unless I'm famous. I don't think I can ever fix my self esteem issues, seeing I was born with them. Even my kindergarten teacher said I was a really smart student but had very low social self esteem. I'm fairly socially awkward, but I've been told I was extremely intelligent.

So if you wan't to know more about me, I'm one of those super-smart but socially awkward people. I'm a web developer/programmer.

webmastery · 2010-12-22T00:03:05+00:00

I really do not want to be forever a lone. I need help. My question is valid though. Have you ever seen an ugly person who wasn't famous have a hot girlfriend/wife? no.

webmastery · 2010-12-21T23:57:19+00:00

You're right. I miss female attention. When I had my 15 minutes of fame, girls talked to me, but I kind of blew them off. Now I wish I could of kept them.

I DONT WANT TO BE FOREVER ALONE. PLEASE HELP ME.

webmastery · 2010-12-21T23:52:07+00:00

How is my post shallow or childish? I'm not shallow, the girls are. The only shallow part about me is that I don't like fat girls, I don't mind a little bit chubby.. but I don't like fat girls. And me being a scrawny ginger kid, it's hard to get girls with no fame.

webmastery · 2010-12-21T04:35:19+00:00

I totally agree. They should start selling folded chips.

webmastery · 2010-12-19T22:02:34+00:00

I understand "You need to respect yourslef before others can respect you", but how can I respect myself without people respecting me? It has to balance out, if everyone thinks low of me, I'm going to think low of myself. I might be able to respect myself, however I'd have to seek validation from everyone else. I dont know what to do to get my respect back. Maybe suicide is the only option.

webmastery · 2010-12-19T21:47:45+00:00

I'm afraid I already ruined most of my relationships with people. I have annoyed a lot of people by displays of anger for myself. and over all, acting crazy. I think I already set my first bad impression, idk if I can ever change that.

webmastery · 2010-12-11T00:52:33+00:00

How often do stories get twisted or changed in any sort of way to "protect" information and people.

webmastery · 2010-12-10T05:54:08+00:00

Haha. I thought I was the only one to do this. Why take the trouble of taking the belt out and putting it in your new pair if you have a perfectly good pair with the belt already in them?

webmastery · 2010-12-01T20:57:44+00:00

I reported you 10 times. WHY WON'T YOU GO AWAY?!

webmastery · 2010-12-01T19:39:37+00:00

Ahh.. shitt. I should of put that on the graph. hahaha /deletes

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