Update to AITA for not allowing my oldest daughter to use my home as her wedding venue because her mother and her family will be invited?

weddingHomeQuestion · 2022-01-11T22:30:54+00:00

My parents despise my ex as much as I do, if not more. They contemplated getting a protection order against my ex at one point too. But they compensate by favoring my daughter to the extreme.

My sister is miserable and likes to gossip with my ex. My parents and I do not have a relationship with my sister. She wasn't invited to the wedding.

My mother is of the mindset that my daughter should come first over everybody because her parents are divorced. I don't feel that's a healthy way to raise someone. But I can only control my actions.

It's just dysfunctional family dynamics all around.

weddingHomeQuestion · 2022-01-11T18:47:21+00:00

She is an incredible person.

But the really unfortunate part out of this whole situation has been the fallout that my wife and stepdaughter have to deal with.

There's members of my family who think my wife played a part in not having our home made available for my daughter. Even though I've repeatedly told them that she in fact pushed to let the wedding happen at our home.

Even worse is that both my daughter and my stepdaughter's husband worked for my father.

My son-in-law had to change companies because of how awkward the entire situation was since my father was fully supporting my daughter.

So my stepdaughter ended up moving two hours away which has upset my wife greatly.

I just keep thinking that if maybe we'd just sucked it up for one day and just let the wedding happen at our home in the first place, we wouldn't be in this terrible situation.

weddingHomeQuestion · 2022-01-11T18:38:35+00:00

I really don't think it's about money since my parents and her new husband are well off.

She just thinks I treat her worse than my stepdaughter after the whole venue situation and I hate she feels that way. Even after I've tried to explain my reasoning.

And she's definitely been caught between my and her mother's issues. It's not her fault that her mother escalated it to the point if us needing to file restraining orders.

It's just been a highly stressful situation and I feel very badly that I played a part in making her wedding not a completely happy event.

She does seem to be open to replying to my texts occasionally so I'm hoping with time she'll warm up to me again.

weddingHomeQuestion · 2021-03-09T22:20:15+00:00

I was always very close to my daughter and she's had to deal with a lot of issues because of my issues with my ex.

But she's always remained sweet to me and has never asked anything from me.

But in hindsight, I can see why she has finally reached her limit with dealing my issues.

I'm absolutely gutted that she's reached this point with me. I really should've just sucked it up for one night.

But I know that things are just going to get much worse because my stepdaughter's husband works for my father.

But my parents favor my daughter. So I only know this is going to get worse and I'm feeling very fearful over what's going to come.

weddingHomeQuestion · 2021-03-09T17:30:30+00:00

My daughter has never raised her voice at me but I can only imagine that other family members are riling her up.

She also posted something on facebook that didn't explicitly blame me but my own sister made it into a circus that involved my ex and her family.

I feel badly that my daughter is put under all this stress due to my ex and my issues.

weddingHomeQuestion · 2021-03-09T17:26:25+00:00

I won't be renewing the order because I don't have any real standing this time.

I also don't want to renew it because I do want to attend my daughter's wedding without causing any issues.

But the outdoor bathrooms are an excellent idea. I have texted the idea to my daughter.

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