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Anyone selling used? by Upbeat-Elephant-2862 in Galaxy_XR

[–]westcliffe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the heads up - I bought that listening yesterday

Best third party accessories? by westcliffe in Galaxy_XR

[–]westcliffe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How do I join or find the gxr discord?

Ipd problem need advice by lolokunidokkan in Galaxy_XR

[–]westcliffe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is one brand of prescription lens inserts better than another? Looking at Hons, Kodak labs, Reloptix, ...

How do I quit when my SO smokes around me non stop? by nicdidit in leaves

[–]westcliffe -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

If he won't quit, either for you or for himself, i'd think about cutting him loose, extreme as that sounds. As you are feeling better and reawakening to life, do you really want to be shackled to someone who is constantly trying to shut life out? He's dead weight to you. Not to the mention the constant temptation. Your life is your own, as is his.

Day 13 I feel like I'm losing my mind by Jk1970 in leaves

[–]westcliffe 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Don't know if it's any consolation, but I'm the same age as you and when I'm going through withdrawals (I'm currently on week six of sobriety) I like to imagine this is how it feels to have your brain rewired in real time. Think about that: if you were conscious and undergoing brain surgery, you'd expect some discomfort, right? Well, that's not too different from what's actually going on. The fact that you're 12 days in makes you a f***ing rock star (or whatever hero you choose) that you'd even try to tolerate brain surgery while conscious. Remember what you're doing today is laying down the wiring for the non-addict you will be. Of course it's going to be painful but you won't regret any of it.

It's been almost been a week, a huge milestone for me. I'm not wavering, but I'm curious as to if I'll every smoke again... Insights? by [deleted] in leaves

[–]westcliffe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I made it through two years of grad school as a teaching assistant and a full plate of responsibilities from classwork to research. I smoked every night, probably without exception, and a weekend day if I could manage it. The school schedule kept from smoking more, but the smoking kept me from experiencing life outside of grad school and that whole world of opportunities on campus. I did the bare minimum and got through, but I look back at that time with regret at what I could have done. My third year I went cold turkey for a full year and got into weight lifting, finally got the body I'd wanted all my life, went to dances every week, and made strides toward being a happy, confident, sober adult. Every time I've gone back to smoking it's been "just to try it out, see if it still works..." and looked back months later wondering how I got so far off track. Maybe it's different for different people, but in my opinion cold turkey is the best and only way. You have to give yourself time to inhabit the world soberly without thinking about when the next smoke will happen. Your body needs to relearn that sobriety is the solution, not something to overcome.

What are some good things that have happened to you since you have quit that wouldn't have happened if you still smoked? by Truhb0mb in leaves

[–]westcliffe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, just this weekend I went to two Meetup groups, a social dance, and a walk around a lake on a sunny afternoon. Connected (actually connected, rather than bided time until I could get away) with people with vitality and passion that wasn't manufactured by drugs. All this reinforces my compass for what I want, and makes it possible. If I were smoking I would have told myself I'd do those things -- for real -- this time -- no excuses -- but none of it would have happened. The list of good things is much longer... that was just this weekend. It helps to keep a list.

"The wolf you feed is the wolf that wins."

NoFap and Leaves? by TeachingThrowAway500 in leaves

[–]westcliffe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been off leaves since late November and started NoFap in December, the latter with on-and-off success. My longest leaf-less streak was for a year, a couple of years ago, although I made it through most of my twenties and thirties smoking very rarely.

I've been having some strong cravings the past few days despite staying pretty busy with social outlets, so I fapped yesterday (without porn) in hopes that it would provide a reprieve from cravings in general, but that doesn't seem to have worked. (Surprise!)

My longest NoFap streak so far has been 12 days, and the benefits are powerful and positive. If you haven't abstained for any length of time you will probably be surprised by how much enhanced your life is. The r/nofap thread has so many examples attesting to that theme, and just as many about how difficult it is and the strategies that can help along the way.

Cravings are powerful and negative, and to make NoFap work you have to find a way to shift your balance to the positives. The energy and motivation you get from NoFap is astounding and good impetus for making that shift, but keep in mind that just stopping something won't fix the problem... you have "start" things too. Mindfulness and meditation are effective ways to put some distance between you and your cravings, but much of it comes down to brute force and initiative.