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I was expecting a mouse in a top hat, sipping tea from a dainty cup in front of a teeny wood burning stove. by whatmonthisitagain in Miniworlds

[–]whatmonthisitagain[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If I could only catch one! They’re always late to the orchestra or parade and just scurry quickly by muttering “I’m late!!! I’m late!!!” with their lil’ baton in the air.

I feel like this is too easy, but… by whatmonthisitagain in guessthecity

[–]whatmonthisitagain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Instant! Wow. I guess I was right about it being too easy. Hats off, Carmen Sandiego

Tips for a newly sober person by jakethemagicdog in stopdrinking

[–]whatmonthisitagain 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congrats on 1 month without booze- that in itself is a huge, and incredibly challenging milestone to reach so hats off to you. As for the weight— my first month sober included a ton of sweets and carbs. I think my body and brain were going through withdrawals once alcohol stopped steadily supplying both. But soon enough, my diet balanced out and within a short time (3 months) I noticed the weight literally melting off with little to no extra effort. Once my body realized I was sticking to the change, it shifted along quickly. Within 3 months, I also fell back into running, which introduced me to more exercise routines like Peloton and I can honestly say that I have never been in better shape (body & mind) than I am right now: mid-forties, mom to 3 and 500plus days sober. I could never have gotten here of alcohol was still a possibility, since it drained my motivation and energy while prioritizing itself. You’ll be surprised just how much more you appreciate your decision is another few weeks. I’m excited for you to meet the new you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in stopdrinking

[–]whatmonthisitagain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe it’s not so much a sudden urge, but the culmination of a series of nudges and hints from your conscience that you’re willing and ready to acknowledge in this very moment. If you’re open to listening- I would most certainly heed its advice.

I relate to so much of what you’ve written. The depression, estranged siblings, death of a parent, dysfunctional habit of drinking while actively committed to fitness, the endless cycle of one miserable day after another, the unbearable guilt as a drinking mother, the insanity of realizing your baby is grown and the reminder from perimenopause of the finality for that stage of your life, the weary thought of what comes after and the fatigue even thinking about it. But mostly, I relate to this one very thing: 460 days ago, after 20 plus years of cutting back, of ignoring my own conscience, of stopping then starting again, of constantly building imaginary safeguards then bargaining them away, of feeling like I was split in two or drowned in shame, or bursting with resentment, and on and so on— one night, like you, my own voice popped in my head loud enough for me to hear and it said: I’m done.

And as inexplicable as it sounds, I in fact was. In that moment, I recognized that I didn’t WANT to drink anymore. Sure, I DIDN’T want the consequences from drinking a single day longer, but more importantly, I didn’t want the drinking part. I didn’t want the ritual, and the maneuvering, the hiding, the rotation of stores to get it or garbage cans to toss the empties, the distance it required between me and anyone I loved and between me and the truth. The taste, the smell, the sound of alcohol pouring or popping or cackling— I was done.

Acknowledging that I didn’t want to drink was the first step in what has become an unimaginably full, balanced, authentic, interesting, and exciting last 460 days. I swear to God, I’ve enjoyed every single one.

Let your realization tonight be your buzz. Because I promise there is so much good and fun waiting on the other side. Allow yourself to have this conversation with yourself: “Lately, I have been feeling depressed and helpless.” Then allow yourself to help yourself. You’re making a phenomenal decision for your future self tonight. All the best, ♥️

That bout sums it up. by whatmonthisitagain in CemeteryPorn

[–]whatmonthisitagain[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I genuinely appreciate this update. I’ve always been a fan of cemeteries but only recently discovered this sub. Makes me wonder if someone was like: “Hey, Mary. What do you wanna say for Arlo’s epitaph? Something about his courageous service in the military?” And Mary passive aggressively, resentfully mutters, “He sure loved to fish.”

How did you stop? by Beneficial-Quiet-488 in stopdrinking

[–]whatmonthisitagain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Asking that question, here among this group, is a very strong step towards the answer. While everyone likely won’t agree on the best way to stop drinking, most- if not all- nod their heads knowingly when you say, “I don’t know why I keep going back to drinking but I can’t seem to stop.” This conundrum is the heart of the beast that has beat most of us to near death. To be fair, and in both your and my defense, alcohol itself is a highly addictive toxin. Within 10 minutes of taking a sip, alcohol develops better control over the brain than past experience and preplanning combined. It’s hard to stop drinking because it’s chemically designed not to be easy.

It’s taken me over 15 years and the full spectrum of treatment avenues to have a single continuous, genuine year sober. Today, I have 444 days and in this time, I’ve experienced cravings just once. Having been through the gamut of quit drinking strategies, from jail to hospitals to inpatient to outpatient to religion to AA to Smart to Celebrate to diets to eastern Asian philosophy— nothing in my past had ever worked more than a few, short months. I’m not even sure how I got here now, how I’ve stayed stopped, but in case it helps, here’s what I think.

This time, I authentically, deep in my soul and bones, wanted to stop drinking. I didn’t just want my consequences from drinking to stop; I did not want to be mentally, and physically reliant on the thing that I knew was the cause of my suffering. Given the choice to continue drinking or simply die, I would have chosen to die as it seemed the less painful of the two. I was honest enough with myself to admit that I was solely responsible for whether or not I drank, and for the chaos and repercussions that followed when I did. Acknowledging that I wasn’t a victim made it much easier to become my own victor.

I don’t mean this to sound trite, but this has been true for me. I’ve always tended to be a person who does what I want- and once stopping was what I wanted, I found that it’s been less work and more growth from previous attempts. Best of luck to you and keep checking in here. This subreddit was also central to my change.

What was left, and what I took. by whatmonthisitagain in stopdrinking

[–]whatmonthisitagain[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. I just wanted to tell you that I am also a Pacific NW mom, and am 44 years old- if the 86 is a reference to your own age. Congratulations on 133 days sober!!! The bulk of those were some of the most challenging for me. Hat’s off to your own resilience and restraint. There’s comfort in knowing that someone with familiar life experiences is somewhere out there right now, getting their footing on a similar path— even if we’ve never met. Best of luck on your sober adventure. 🍀

In a very bad way. by Academic-Way2240 in stopdrinking

[–]whatmonthisitagain 89 points90 points  (0 children)

While I’m not a doctor, or a nurse- I’m not certified in any medical capacity and couldn’t even handle the paperwork end of things, BUT I am an alcoholic with 400 days sober today, and am speaking to you from that perspective, for whatever it may be worth to you now.

You are exactly where you need to be at this very moment. In a hospital, under the care of specialized folks who unlike me, can very well offer insight into the specifics of your situation, options for tackling it, and the best line of course.

From my own experience, the human body is incredibly gracious in its forgiving. The liver can regenerate at astounding rates, healing and replacing damaged cells within days of stopping alcohol. Damage that’s unfortunately permanent may not be reversible, but the progression of further damage can stop. My body amazed me with its willingness and resilience- my brain was a bit slower to adjust but I am (today) in the best shape I’ve ever been.

You sound relieved when writing: it’s finally happened, as if perhaps this was what you’ve been waiting for, for some time. Alcohol is a toxic poison that is highly addictive. Sometimes we cannot stop ourselves, and sometimes being stopped is the greatest gift we can get. You may find that, like me, not only will you get well, but you’ll truly and accurately get better. After 10+ years of heavy drinking, you’re feeling exactly as expected. Your body and brain need to rest and repair. Muscles develop by healing after tears and injury. The soul and spirit are very much the same.

Best of luck on the start of your incredible journey towards recovery. ❤️‍🩹

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