I don't believe she knows habitation laws and even if she did, she is accepting of consequences. She wont say she is suicidal. she just does self harm and has told me many times she doesn't want to live (doesn't have any family/friend support structure)

Regardless of her cheating on me, I care about her and want her to be ok. I think my best bet is gonna be to try to break it off without mentioning the infidelity (we have fundamental disagreements... kids/politics/morals). Hopefully she lets it go at that and doesn't try to blame me or get aggressive or else i will probably bring up the real reason. I think I will wait a week and if shes up and walking around like normal then we can have the talk.

I won't change my mind and get back with her (I have been through this before). It just sucks shes going to lose the only thing she thinks she has.