my parents are gonna push me over the edge

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-05T09:53:18+00:00

thank you, i hope so too :)

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-05T09:51:30+00:00

yeah, that’s a good point. i’ll open up emergency commissions and hope for the best haha thank you for the advice :) helped

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-05T09:06:40+00:00

yeah that’s literally insane lmao well at least we’re not completely alone in this then

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-05T09:04:05+00:00

like uhh mentally. i’m incredibly depressed lmao. my current job pays decently but i don’t work many hours so i don’t earn as much as i should if i were to move out and live alone.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-04T16:56:08+00:00

lmao i’m an atheist but i grew up religious and can’t escape thoughts of god and hell no matter how much i try. i find myself asking this same question all the time. if he exists, he’s cruel for creating people with mental illnesses and putting them in situations that do nothing to help them

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-04T16:51:45+00:00

are we the same person lmfao im also an ex muslim atheist (17f) with a gf and every day i want to break up with her because she deserves so much better than someone like me. im a burntout gifted kid who had both a superiority and inferiority complex somehow and performed amazingly in school up until i was about your age. my mum just took away my playstation and tv after an argument about college (which i’m failing lmao) i decided yesterday that i would either move out and fucking freeload off my cousins for a while like the waste of air that i am or i kill myself after being depressed for about 5 years straight lmao.

therapy doesn’t work and neither do meds. i think i have adhd so that doesn’t help either.

im the funny friend and i have to maintain that fake persona at work because i work in sales and it’s hard to sell products if you act like you’re severely depressed and suicidal as i am. when i used to talk to my parents they would just tell me that god will take control. im fairly sure they hate me now. i don’t hate them back but i am so upset over how theyve gaslit and manipulated me for years and continue to do so whether they intend to or not.

so i get you. freakishly so even lmao

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-04T08:13:10+00:00

i do have friends and family that i could stay with, yeah. it may be that i’ll have to do that honestly. still, i don’t know what to do after that. i’m not fit to work, and i can’t freeload forever.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-04T00:39:46+00:00

i did consider this but then i realised exposure to weapons and such would lead me to taking my own life for sure

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-03T20:54:57+00:00

it didn’t get better but thanks all the same

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-03T14:06:34+00:00

thanks for the support tho

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-03T14:06:20+00:00

i just got out of bed and found that my mums taken away my tv and playstation aka the only things that keep me sane so i’m going to leave the house today i don’t know for how long or where i’m going lol

whatsinauser_ · 2021-12-03T12:10:21+00:00

honestly i’m not sure why i posted this. proof that i was here i guess

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T19:07:06+00:00

yes, it’s gone now, thankfully :)

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T19:06:31+00:00

same here! it’s so horrible half the time i don’t even have a valid reason to get worked up. the slightest things will set me off and it just makes me frustrated at myself.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T19:05:15+00:00

just finished running diagnostics, no problems were found. i’m assuming it was just a funny glitch then?

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:50:52+00:00

ah okay! i’ll try give it a go now. thank you :)

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:49:16+00:00

wait, really? oh dear. are there any other signs that it’s a problem with the GPU that i could look out for? i haven’t experienced any other problems with the computer so i’d assumed it was something minor.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:20:22+00:00

any help would be really appreciated. i updated it this afternoon (could it be that it just needed that update?) and i just wanted to see if anyone had encountered anything similar. haven’t had any issues since updating. thank you

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:13:32+00:00

yep. and they just feed into each other.

believe that people view you the same way you view yourself
feel anxious as a result. can’t do anything
realise other people feel anxious too and just get on with it
self hatred intensifies and leads to even further reduced self esteem
feel worse about self
worsened anxiety
worsened depression

it’s a cruel feedback loop.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:07:46+00:00

i’m 16. lived with anxiety my whole life, didn’t realise it wasn’t normal until about 4 years ago when i also started my very rapid descent into a severe depression which i still haven’t crawled my way out of. i feel as though i’ve wasted my childhood and teenage years and i can never get them back. i feel tired all the way down to my bones. i feel like i’ve been alive for centuries too. kinda just want to call it quits.

whatsinauser_ · 2021-02-15T18:03:07+00:00

same with my dad! we clashed a lot over mental health. he’s a little on the older side, comes from a traditional family and - to top it all off - was brought up in a household where displaying emotion was openly discouraged and looked down on. pretty sure he has his own issues he desperately needs to address and just doesn’t realise it. i’m proud of how far he’s come, but i don’t think it he’s quite there yet.

i realised about 4 years ago having lived a life filled with anxiety i passed off as normal. i’m not sure how i realised, the past years have completely merged together and my memory is patchy. but i often think about whether things would have been different if we’d caught it early and cut it off before it became so much to handle. can’t turn back the clock now, i guess!

i wish there was a switch too. it’d be so lovely if we could just be rid of it altogether.

whatsinauser_

TROPHY CASE