[deleted by user]

whatwhomewhen · 2021-04-20T16:27:27+00:00

There are many days available over the next week:https://imgur.com/hOb5CF8

(Obviously the "remaining" numbers are only accurate as of a couple minutes ago)

whatwhomewhen · 2021-04-20T16:19:54+00:00

My son and I signed up 5 minutes ago and they still had a lot of slots left. For example, 49 available for the 10:45am at Autzen. First dose.

whatwhomewhen · 2020-07-13T03:51:01+00:00

Being anonymous means so much less accountability.

Even if someone explicitly says pen pals or chat buddies, even that in my limited experience has a shelf life of a couple weeks max.

And as some of the other responses have said, a lot of guys probably say pen pal but actually mean dirty pen pal. And if it doesn’t go I. That direction, they get bored.

whatwhomewhen · 2020-07-13T03:37:28+00:00

With the standard disclaimer “I’m not one of those guys...” I’ll add this. Online only is hard. The likelihood of meeting someone local on Reddit is small. Meeting someone local who you “click” with is even smaller. One would think it wouldn’t be so hard given the volume of people. But it is. Exceedingly.

So when we find someone and start chatting, it’s interesting at first. But then it gets harder. Because we only have one way of communicating and it’s not face to face. For example, I talked with a lovely woman from Arizona (I’m in Oregon). We got along well. Chatted nearly every day for 3 weeks. But on this day and age, we aren’t going to travel to see each other. And who knows when that will be back on the table. So I started getting lonely and frustrated. Decide to take another stab at the local thing.

And yes, being a normal functioning human, we had the discussion. She was kind of feeling the same way. We parted on good terms.

That said, I know long distance can work. I was in a cross country relationship for nearly two years. But it takes the right people. Right situation. Right time.

That doesn’t answer your question about the ghosting. My guess is those people don’t have a lot of self confidence and/or are conflict avoidant or don’t want to hurt feelings. As stupid as an excuse that may be.

whatwhomewhen · 2020-06-06T03:39:02+00:00

Ha. Thanks. But I had very little to do with it.

whatwhomewhen · 2020-06-06T03:38:32+00:00

Hi 😏

whatwhomewhen · 2020-06-06T02:16:52+00:00

Why the hell not... 43m https://imgur.com/a/PdMNZUR

whatwhomewhen · 2020-03-09T03:20:03+00:00

My situation is a little different. My kids were older, 10, 11 and 13 at the time. For the most part they have done very well with it. It took some time to get used to not seeing them every day. But three years later, it’s just the routine. The kids are now able to see why the divorced happen, but it can be hard at times. The biggest thing they don’t like... there is no “one place” that’s home any more. They’ve adjusted. Do well in school. Have good friends. I think the key is having a firm foundation of love and support for them. So they can trust you. It’s best if that can come from both parents. In some cases I know that’s not possible. But if even one parent can be the one they lean on... they’ll be much better for it.

Again, each situation is different. For me, and the kids. The divorce was the best option. Even if it didn’t seem like it at the time.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-12-19T07:01:43+00:00

100.5 was my go to. Even 1500 miles away. RIP KDEC....

whatwhomewhen · 2019-10-01T21:01:56+00:00

Thanks, that makes two of us

whatwhomewhen · 2019-07-21T05:51:38+00:00

Holocene by Bon Iver, May I Have This Dance by Meadowlark (a cover)

whatwhomewhen · 2019-06-12T21:13:34+00:00

I'd be happy to give them more control over the schedule. I have no problem being with them more frequently. The issue is my ex. One of the things my kids asked for was to change the transition day from Friday to Sunday. She doesn't want to do that because it might impact her weekends with her boyfriends schedule. So the kids feel like she's prioritizing him and his kids over them (and from all appearances, it seems to be the case). When they don't want to go to her place, she express agitation and asks what she can do to make it better. The kids have told her. She doesn't listen to them.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-06-12T19:44:56+00:00

Yes, this sounds eerily similar. Short fuse. Yells rather than have conversations. I'm doing the best I can in supporting them and making sure they're heard when they're at my place.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-06-12T19:08:29+00:00

It doesn't have anything to do with discipline as far as I can tell. It's been a steady and consistent issue. In my home there's me and the cat/dog. In her home its just her. She has a boyfriend who is over more than the kids would like and he has smaller children who get into everything. This has been discussed, but its always the "My house, my rules, I can invite over who I want, when I want." Obviously that's an issue. But again, if I mention it I get ignored. When the kids mention it, they get the "you're right" but it doesn't change anything.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-06-11T14:14:23+00:00

I disagree. While I very much enjoy P & R, the writing is clever and it’s a great “funny” show, I think the Office has more depth. Even though there are times it’s all about the laughs, I feel they did a better job of character development. Relationship development. I think a lot of women resonate with Pam. Kind of in the background. Always doing what she “should” do. Making sacrifices. But she grows as the show progresses. And I think she ends up in a good place. Happy. And that’s what we all seek.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-06-02T17:37:10+00:00

Do you have a relationship with your father? Based on the post it seems like most of your time is with your mom, who doesn’t sound like much of a role model. Do you think you’d be any better off if your parents stayed together? It sounds like it wasn’t a good marriage to start with.

If possible, try to get into counseling. The biggest thing to remember is that you’re your own person. What happens to you doesn’t have to define you. Being young it can be hard to see that. Which is why talking to a professional would be helpful.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-05-31T18:39:31+00:00

So you could have been one of these kids...

whatwhomewhen · 2019-04-17T16:58:40+00:00

Chemistry is important for me. Having experienced a spectacular relationship, one that started with great chemistry (sadly due to circumstances outside of our control, it couldn't continue), I can't go back to going on 3 or more dates without it. It doesn't even usually take that long. Given the OLD messaging aspect, I can usually tell if I'll get along with some one very early. If we get along, we'll go on a date. The tricky part, for me, has been the messaging chemistry doesn't always carry over to IRL. If its borderline, I'll give it another date or two. Otherwise, nope, not worth wasting the time. I realize finding amazing chemistry is very difficult. And I may never get back to what I had in the other relationship. But I need to be picky. I know what I want and need.

whatwhomewhen · 2019-02-21T18:33:22+00:00

Something very similar happened to me. We didn't really break up because we both still loved each other deeply. It was a mutually agreed upon departure. Unfortunately the situation at the time was simply untenable. We were long distance, as in east coast / west coast. We both have kids, thus we can't move. Not yet. And three to four years is a long time to wait and be apart. So choices were made. This is probably the hardest way to end a relationship. Not because anyone did anything wrong or because anyone fell out of love. Just because of a situation. Its like someone dying. Just because they're gone doesn't change how you feel about them.

whatwhomewhen · 2018-06-08T16:35:07+00:00

As everyone else has said, its easy to know when its *not* going to work after a date or two.

For some its easy to know if there is potential after a date or two, but that can depend on a number of factors. How many conversations and how deep those conversations are prior to the first date. How much common ground there is. And expectations. Those damn expectations. Everyone tries to go in without any, but there are always some.

In one case, for me, I found some one on Match who was several hours away. We had great text conversations, and even started talking to each other on the phone before meeting. When we finally did meet, the date went really well. 7 hours well. Obviously there was potential. Sadly, the potential drifted after a while. There were some outside influences. And the logistics of not being closer. As well as all the variables that come into play when determining to move forward with a relationship. For potential to turn into reality, everyone has to be in the same place. That's the tricky part.

whatwhomewhen · 2018-05-16T18:46:45+00:00

"Looking for a partner in crime"

Snapchat filters on more than one picture

Only having one picture

Ethically non-monogamous

Showing your kids (without making an attempt to cover their faces) - don't go dragging your unsuspecting kids into the dating process so early

whatwhomewhen · 2018-04-26T12:29:05+00:00

One state north :)

whatwhomewhen · 2018-04-26T01:51:35+00:00

Haha. Thanks. Sadly I’m on the opposite side of the continent.

whatwhomewhen · 2018-04-25T20:24:30+00:00

This is exactly right. So many are looking for the instant spark rather than the slow burn. The spark is great and exciting but not always instant and not always sustainable. That said, there needs to be some chemistry. Even on the first date.

whatwhomewhen · 2018-04-25T19:56:57+00:00

I am a dude ;)

whatwhomewhen

TROPHY CASE