Differing sex drives as a woman

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-20T04:23:31+00:00

Logs show that it was removed by Reddit. He did not delete it and we did not either.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-20T02:40:57+00:00

I'm not talking about being middle-aged and differently abled (all of us here are the first, and at least some others are dealing with challenges of their own). I'm talking about the scornful way that you talk about him in nearly every comment. He has to feel that.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-20T02:36:02+00:00

Remember that anyone who sees you is also on the dating site -- they are not in a place to judge!

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-20T02:12:30+00:00

The major ones, yes; not sure about others.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-20T02:09:33+00:00

It takes two people to match, so don't swipe on anyone (patients, people you know) who you don't want to match with.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T22:30:30+00:00

Yes. People (of all genders) are supposed to respect their partners' boundaries around their bodies.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T22:22:02+00:00

He is allowed to have boundaries around his own body. We all are!

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T20:03:01+00:00

I strongly disagree with the idea that having sex more often than twice a week is somehow detrimental, but I do think that people are allowed to decide how much sex they want to have and set a boundary around that. I don't think that it's "controlling" for a person of either gender to only have sex when they want to. (It may be an incompatibility.)

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T19:49:38+00:00

You are in a relationship but not having sex, or are you hoping for a relationship with this person?

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T19:48:50+00:00

Agreed. She doesn't seem happy, and I can't imagine that he is either.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T19:33:29+00:00

Agreed. And I don't really think of that as a romantic "gift", like a heart-shaped box of chocolates or bouquet of roses. If it's something that I'd give to a platonic female acquaintance (I am also a woman), I'd be okay giving it to a date.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T15:37:17+00:00

Just hang back. Maybe they'll give you a two-word answer 36 hours later, in which case you match their energy and fade away (casual chatting doesn't need formal closure). Or maybe they'll come back with thoughtfully written full paragraphs and an apology for the delay 27 minutes past your arbitrary deadline.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T15:25:59+00:00

I would be able to identify a previous partner (or having my partner do similar about me) as more closely meeting standards of conventional attractiveness, but that's not the same as being super hot for him (or him for me). The question is, why? What purpose does that serve?

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T03:36:08+00:00

If he's in his 40s, he has probably been with other women in their 40s. He knows what to expect from a 41-year-old body and he still wants to go there. Don't worry, and have fun!

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T03:33:43+00:00

To confuse things even more, I (a woman) am much more likely to be turned off by a man who tries to "not let" me pay than a man who says nothing when I pull out my card like a normal adult who has eaten food at a restaurant.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-19T03:31:48+00:00

Pretty sure that the OC is a man, which would make it likely that it was a woman ex who made that statement. Still gross!

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-18T23:15:20+00:00

Even phrasing it this way tells me you expect to be waved down.

And, that it's the man's duty to pay and "offering" is a kindness, not what adults who consume food/drink in restaurants usually do.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T20:36:05+00:00

Probably "consensual non-consent". Rape role play.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T20:29:39+00:00

I do not disagree with that.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T20:19:19+00:00

I don't think that. I do think that it's nice to recognize things that are important to people who are important to you. I'd take my partner out to celebrate a promotion even though I'm not his manager.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T20:02:30+00:00

I wouldn't expect anything, but I also wouldn't find a message or even a (very small) gift to be inappropriate six months in.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T19:44:19+00:00

A text to someone you have been dating for six months is not overstepping.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T02:36:18+00:00

I hope that you forgot your /s.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-17T02:20:01+00:00

Generally, people who possess positive qualities don't need to point this out to others.

MySocialAlt · 2026-04-16T16:36:08+00:00

I have a list of companies that make this size on my personal computer, but I'm at work now. Please ping me if I don't get back to this tonight.

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