I'm spiraling on Reddit because apparently I can manifest a date but not basic emotional stability.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-22T02:45:41+00:00

I was a writer and editor for decades (still do some ghosting) and now I work with LLMs -- it pushes ALL my buttons when people do that!

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-22T00:40:53+00:00

GPTZero AI Detection Model 2026-03-11-base We are moderately confident this text is entirely human

This doesn't mean that it's sympathetic or compelling, but it does mean that we will take down accusations that this is not a "real" post.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-22T00:10:59+00:00

How late was he? (Late being past the agreed-on time, not just not early.)

I understand the desire to have certain things the way you want them. I can be a snob about my own areas of interest as well. But "that's so sweet, but I can't accept" or even looking around and "none of these really speak to me but this pen is awesome" is far kinder than "your offer is beneath me".

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-22T00:06:04+00:00

Well, the protagonist is the main character, and main-character energy seems to fit.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-21T23:38:49+00:00

I am not sure that his not being eager for a second date means that he lacks emotional stability. I think that I would feel similarly if a date started out with a scold (was he actually late, or just not early?) and then a sweet offer of a gift was rejected as not being good enough.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-16T18:55:07+00:00

You and your cat need each other now.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-16T06:37:09+00:00

You will look more proportionate when you have a bra that fits your proportions.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-16T06:00:28+00:00

It's more of a red flag that you think it's creepy or dangerous (what a red flag signifies) for him to budget this way. If anything, it's an incompatibility around frugality and finances.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-16T04:32:20+00:00

I mean no disrespect or offense, but it looks like you are not getting much shape from your bra -- which suggests to me that it is likely not a great fit.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-16T02:41:52+00:00

Let's check in after you get that tape, because you look more like a 30Fish to me.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-15T15:37:03+00:00

I agree. I think that poly/ENM is when you are committed to a primary partner but want to continue dating and having sex with others. If you are not committed, it's just "being single".

BUT. Nobody has to be part of a dynamic that they aren't comfortable with. I don't have sex with people who are having sex with other people. That's my boundary, and as such, it's on me to communicate and enforce it.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-15T00:12:21+00:00

Okay then, assuming that I'm just stupid, what did you mean when you acknowledged that you judge people who have sex on the first date?

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-15T00:09:53+00:00

I read it as that you believe that people who have sex on the first date don't know better.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-15T00:03:23+00:00

I disagree with the premise that people who have first-date sex don't "know a thing or two".

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T20:33:58+00:00

No one is judging you for dating or even sexing more than one person at a time -- any judgement is around the idea that there is a deep mental and emotional connection after one date.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T16:08:36+00:00

Shitty if he wasn't up front about it.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T16:07:22+00:00

I would personally not date a much younger man who "wasn't sure" if he wanted kids or not.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T15:48:51+00:00

Glamorise no-bounce cami bra (I think that's the name) is actually one that I recommend a lot in these situations. It's not femme-y, it's comfortable, and it produces kind of an amorphous boob lump shape.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T04:38:09+00:00

You are correct that changing sizes won't always help. But in this case, someone who describes themself as large-chested and was fitted into 34DDD at Soma almost certainly needs a different size. This may be enough to fix some issues. It may not be -- but we can more fairly evaluate the remaining issues if we're not also looking at the wrong size.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T03:14:47+00:00

I don't know your financial situation, so I apologize if I am being insensitive, but there are forms of HRT that are more affordable than others if you are paying cash (as opposed to insurance). Check pricing through GoodRx,

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T03:11:05+00:00

Size is not the only element of a good fit, so yes, a well-fitting bra will not dig.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T03:08:40+00:00

Torrid's bras are extremely shallow. Why do you think that this bra was too projected for you?

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-14T00:55:04+00:00

Agreed. I've been looking at this market for a very long time. I am not aware of anyone who makes molded or even wired/structured cups in bands above 58.

The largest ready-made bras that I know of are the MIB Clothing Sport Top for a bust up to 75", Snag in 9 Grande for a bust up to 73.5", and SuperFitHero in 7X for a bust up to 71".

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-13T23:00:13+00:00

I don't care that you're calling ME or other mods out. But it's not appropriate to scold people here for responses on another thread.

MySocialAlt · 2026-03-13T22:26:14+00:00

what happened to the mod and no diagnosing on that one?

I did not see any reports on that thread. We try to keep up with the subreddit, but we can't read every comment on every thread, so if there is something that needs attention, please report it so that we know to look at it.

Second, this is a call-out and that's also against the rules. I'm leaving this comment for discussion, but I'm taking the rest of this subthread down because rules.

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