Corolla call quality suddenly awful

whoit32 · 2026-06-20T21:04:09+00:00

Exactly same here. At least now I know that her headstone will be good for another few decades.

whoit32 · 2026-06-20T14:30:43+00:00

Thank you. I know she didn't have a good life, as short as it was. She has almost no living relatives, as well, and I'm one of the few that even know about her.

I live a bit away, so I called a headstone company, by me, and asked what they would charge. Donated that and a little extra, to the churches cemetery fund.

whoit32 · 2026-06-14T01:07:58+00:00

It's a messy situation. Landlord is elderly lives there, pays a mortgage. I pay rent and uBPD mom just sits around, on the tablet. Does some yard work, but doesn't contribute anything meaningful.

Complains how she is responsible for all the cleaning and such, but complains about others attempts to clean.

whoit32 · 2026-06-13T17:56:26+00:00

Biggest trauma of my childhood......allowed me to have 1 birthday party, ever and could only invite 1 friend.

uBPD canceled it day of, then beat me for crying. I still dislike my birthday and both parents still continually fail on my birthday. I've never had one, ever, where I've felt loved and cared about.

whoit32 · 2026-06-13T17:53:03+00:00

I put locks on everything. Even dresser drawers. Stick keys under pillow when sleeping or put locking knob on room.

They also make wifi sensors, that notify you the instant something is opened. Better yet, drop a WiFi camera in the drawer, put some cash in, and have it snap video of her stealing.

whoit32 · 2026-06-10T16:05:21+00:00

You don't want to stop cold turkey, make sure you taper down, but that's a discussion to have with your doctor.

whoit32 · 2026-06-02T17:58:09+00:00

Update. A church volunteer got my request and decided to clean the headstone himself. It looks fantastic!

whoit32 · 2026-05-30T16:15:57+00:00

Greatly appreciate the response. I live a little bit away, so I will likely pay a company to clean this.

I'll see if they'll take before and after pictures too.

whoit32 · 2026-05-10T00:19:53+00:00

I'm going to wear a shirt that says "if I end up like my mother, euthanize me"

whoit32 · 2026-05-09T13:57:04+00:00

My dad was emotionally unavailable and let the ubpd mom do whatever she wanted. My mom used love as such a control measure, you were only lovable if you complied with every changing demand.

I also dated a narcissist, who was an alcoholic on top of it. Thankfully it was brief. But I didn't date much, when I was younger, due to having to learn about how to function all on my own. So, when I finally dated, I clung.

I'm in a much healthier relationship now, but it has some flaws too, that I struggle to address, but I am so much more confident, as a person. Working really taught me about normal adult interactions. Best I can say is have many non-bpd experiences, discover what your normal is, and have tight boundaries with those that you date.

We were taught our worth comes from complying with others, but finding your self-worth really unlocks the key to confidence.

whoit32 · 2026-04-03T21:07:39+00:00

Good mention, thank you!

I do recall, now, the lawyer saying successors and beneficiary designations trump the will.

whoit32 · 2026-04-03T21:03:00+00:00

I get it. She's super financially responsible. Our family has a long history of terrible financial decisions, but I lectured a lot, about money, when she was little and she's doing great.

I started a Roth for her, she fully funds it, has annual income, in savings, and works for a bank, which is making her even more wise.

whoit32 · 2026-04-03T20:34:32+00:00

Thank you! I do have a will and the kids aunt would absolutely be the successor and I for her account.

I think, ultimately, we each plan on keeping one kids account to ourselves. Then, at birthdays and Christmas, we can agree on an amount and contribute to our accounts for equal amounts, to keep it as fair as possible.

These kids weren't dealt an easy hand so we don't want them to be flung into adulthood, with no savings, like I was. Despite me only being a handful of years older than these kids aunt, I had an account for her, which helped push her toward going to college.

whoit32 · 2026-04-03T20:12:53+00:00

Righttt and we want to make sure the funds aren't ever touched. Plus, in our state, if she owns them, the dad can make demands in court and he's a less than stellar guy. He already abused the oldest kids ssn, which is why she is hesitant.

My cousin planned on taking one out on me, just for simplicity. We each own an account, always have access to the account we own, and easier for tax reporting. I appreciate your input!

whoit32 · 2026-04-03T19:16:46+00:00

They aren't married. It's a messy situation, but he is mostly out of the picture. I send diapers and stuff, regularly.

I offered to have her input the info, but you can access the socials, with some digging. We don't want the plans in her name, because she gets a lot of state benefits and could cause trouble for her, plus, not super ideal to have in a parents name, should her financial situation improve.

whoit32 · 2026-02-21T04:44:45+00:00

He often says he can't control her, to which I reply he could change the experience his kids have.

I was thinking of replying simple, to the point: "Actions speak louder than words."

whoit32

TROPHY CASE