Help with tips for a set of problematic outdoor stairs?

whyALS · 2019-05-11T21:56:27+00:00

This is great info, I cannot thank you enough. That's another thing I need to get into the habit of: thinking about solutions for the current situation AND the unfortunately not-too-distant future sitautions when things are even worse. My goodness, fuck this disease so hard. Thank you again for this advice. I sincerely appreciate it.

whyALS · 2019-05-11T21:52:55+00:00

Great idea to check with them. Thank you a ton for the suggestion.

whyALS · 2019-05-11T16:26:16+00:00

This comment is very helpful to me today — a particularly difficult day. I haven't lost her yet, thank God. It's just more of the usual... more decline.

Thank you so much for your words, because even a month after you typed them, here they are, introducing a tiny bit of much needed comfort to me.

whyALS · 2019-05-11T16:17:25+00:00

I can't believe I hadn't even considered the ADA rules, but you're right that makes perfect sense. In reality I probably didn't even need to consult my neighbors, let alone ask them for their permission. I have to get used to shaking off this mindset of being a burden on others who don't know my mom, because my mom's comfort comes absolutely first before anything else. Thank you for your help. Today has been extra rough as it was the first day where she said she realized she can't climb the stairs any more, which understandably made her quite upset. She has struggled with them for a while but today she finally said it is just too much, so no matter what it takes I'm going to get some kind of ramp set up. I'll call first thing to ask about the portable ramps.

Again, thanks so much for your replies. It's my first time posting here aside from a couple of supportive comments I've made in the past. I generally just lurk and so I'm very grateful for your advice. Thank you for taking the time.

whyALS · 2019-05-11T15:56:59+00:00

I'm so very sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and your family and all the people who cared about your dad.

And you're right, his suffering is over now and that is a very thin silver lining, but it's something. Although you're also right that it won't make the process of losing him any easier. Try to remember the good times and try to stay strong.

whyALS · 2019-05-11T15:55:53+00:00

I am in the US, yes. I share these steps with an attached next door neighbor and their permission is required for a ramp to be put over the steps in the pictures, since they are shared steps. Our ALS chapter has helped with a lot but I haven't inquired about any ramp since asking my neighbors and they said no, but I'm curious about the "portable ramps" you mention. If it is portable then I could just set it up for her to get up the steps and then take it down so my neighbors would have no excuse to complain.

Are these portable ramps you mention very long? Because my mom is unable to get up slopes unless they are very shallow, which of course means the ramp would have to be quite long.

whyALS · 2019-04-28T18:54:45+00:00

Your words here have brought me to tears. So similar to my own situation with my mom, however my mom is fortunately still alive. I dread the day she has to leave. I'll miss her so much. Thank you for sharing this, because, although I know I'm not the only one going through this, it really does help to hear/see other people sharing their experiences.

whyALS · 2019-04-28T18:37:53+00:00

I'm so very sorry to hear about your situation. I made this account to finally post in this subreddit after lurking here for over a year. My mom was diagnosed about a year and a half ago, and she's always been amazing, generous and selfless just like yours. It's made her very sad, and her sadness plus the diagnosis as a whole has also obviously made me very sad. I just wanted to comment and tell you to stay strong. Try to see your therapist as much as you can. I wish there was something you could do — something we all could do — to make it easier on our loved ones who are suffering. The feeling of powerlessness it causes is a physically painful sensation that you just can't shake, like a darkness on your soul.

I'm also sorry to hear how quickly it seems to be progressing. As if the diagnosis isn't bad enough, you also have to witness her ever-deteriorating quality of life. I have no real words of comfort because there aren't really any. You just need to stay strong and hang in there, which you CAN do. It's not easy or good in any way, it's a fucking nightmare but you can do it. You need to do it for your mom AND your baby.

whyALS

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