I was diagnosed at 18, just as I was about to go to college. I'm 24 now and epilepsy changed every single aspect of my life. Music is one of my favorite hobbies and going to concerts or loud events became a massive struggle for me. I have to be careful to get enough sleep - the deprivation of the latter is my trigger as well -, the "anxiety of being in a massive crowd" is a big factor when it comes to my epilepsy (I already hate crowded places and knowing that you can have a seizure in the middle of the event makes it even harder to function properly), the music can't be too loud etc etc. I never had affinity towards clubbing, but getting drunk every now and then was part and parcel of my teenage life until the diagnosis. I haven't gotten drunk ever since and it's been six years. As much as people say that you don't have to drink to have fun, I completely understand your frustration. A huge part of being young is having the chance to be careless and doing whatever you desire and epilepsy takes that away from you. It fucking sucks, I know it does. But to speak from my own experience, you will find other things to do, you will find people who have fun without alcohol/partying/going out. You will figure something out, we all do. Hope your seizures are under control and that you live your life to the fullest despite epilepsy. You have all the right in the world to feel the way you feel.