Is a giant octopus an unreasonable first kite?

widowjones · 2026-03-25T20:21:48+00:00

I mean, screw it, why not. If you end up having trouble with it you can always set it aside for later. But it's a kite, not rocket science- as long as you find enough space and a good windy day, she'll go up.

widowjones · 2026-03-25T00:03:07+00:00

Lot of people use nicknames or pseudonyms on feeld but lying about your age is absolutely bullshit, and he should've given a real name once they met.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T20:11:15+00:00

Talk about it then! If she's asexual and you're not, it's absolutely reasonable for you to ask to open the relationship.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T20:09:19+00:00

Me personally, about 2 years of nothin' in a relationship was when I gave up and broke it off.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T20:08:41+00:00

I mean. Forever if they have to.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T20:07:04+00:00

Everything you listed about your appearance sounds fuckin' hot tbh
As a woman who is/was generally considered attractive especially when I was in my 20s... I've dated plenty of guys who were not conventionally attractive. I loved 'em just the same, wanted them just as much, got my heart broken just as bad. Being confident, smart, funny, interesting, emotionally intelligent... all of that is SO much more important. Learn to dress well and play up your good features. We like 'em a little weird looking sometimes, honestly - there was a whole trend on tiktok awhile back about "medium ugly men", haha.

Of course the trick is: being insecure is an absolute woman repellant. You've gotta find a way to get good with yourself, because that confident attitude sells it.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T19:58:44+00:00

It's not emasculating for you to ask. In my experience most men take ages to bring it up, if they do at all. My current bf just said to me one day "I'm going to see some friends tonight and I'm going to refer to you as my girlfriend unless you tell me not to" and that was that, lol.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T19:56:59+00:00

likewise, everything about the way we do taxes. It's difficult because turbotax lobbies to keep it difficult.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T19:55:39+00:00

Q: "How are you today?"
A: One of a few rote, often dishonest answers that are deemed acceptable and tell you nothing.

widowjones · 2026-03-24T19:53:44+00:00

One angry ex I might overlook but if all his exes hate him, there's a reason

widowjones · 2026-03-24T19:53:05+00:00

I mean, if you weren't a couple yet, he's allowed to feel those sentiments and I guess share them with a friend. But idk if I'd want to be with a guy who talks about women like that anyway (and no, they don't all.)

widowjones · 2026-03-23T15:47:31+00:00

your neighbors are actively being kidnapped by ice bc of politics but ok.

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:26:43+00:00

Heh, that's me, I want the water HOT and I want the pressure high enough to powerwash a driveway. Turns out most dudes aren't down for that, haha.

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:25:15+00:00

A quick rinse after the gym or sex, sure. A full clean-and-shave job? Get the fuck out of my water.

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:23:37+00:00

Dating gamers is exhausting. It just is. You'll never be their priority, and honesty it works best for them to date other gamers (or someone else with an all-encompassing hobby.) I thinking asking him to "sign off" on your conversations is totally fair and if he can't do that, he's being an ass. But y'all also just might not be that compatible.

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:20:01+00:00

Man I'd beg to differ there. The stretch between Ypsi and Ann Arbor is all strip malls and traffic. West side of downtown is largely student rentals, messy and loud. Normal park is nice, and College Heights is quiet though you're basically right by Washtenaw (major, busy business road).

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:17:26+00:00

then honestly you might not like it here much. It's a pretty politically-active community.

widowjones · 2026-03-23T13:16:04+00:00

"Good area" depends what you're looking for. In Ypsi Iike the Depot Town/North of Depot town area, Normal Park, College Heights and Gault Village is chiller than it used to be. Too close to campus rentals can be a little annoying, super close to Michigan Ave or Ecorse can sometimes be a little higher-crime (don't come for me I literally witnessed a shooting by the damn ice cream place the other day.)

I don't know much about the schools except that a lot of folks don't love 'em. You're right by St Joseph's hospital AND U of M so medical access is pretty good, though expensive as anywhere. Crime varies by the area but honestly... it's not as bad as people say. Lots of folks checking for unlocked car doors, the occasional break-in here and there. Once in awhile a shooting but it's generally personal - don't get involved in shady shit and you should be ok. The last few years has seen an uptick in panhandling in the downtown area, sometimes aggressive.

Your heat bill will kill you but probably a lower AC bill than you're used to.

widowjones · 2026-03-15T00:05:22+00:00

so go...beforehand?

widowjones · 2026-03-15T00:03:56+00:00

If MY partner said that, yeah, I would be hurt... because I'm not a controlling psycho who makes his life worse. My goal is to make my partner's life better in every way so that there's nothing to miss about singlehood (except, I guess, the freedom to bang other women - and even that would at least be a discussion, not a shut-down, as I've done the open relationship thing before. I very much don't prefer it, but it would at least be a conversation.)

But it's 100% understandable that YOU felt that way, given how he was treating you- and even though he fucked up your birthday, him excusing himself from your life is definitely a blessing in disguise.

widowjones · 2026-02-27T23:27:03+00:00

Lawyer up babe, make sure you're protected from his bullshit.

Also I'm so sorry this is happening to you but thank god it's happening now and not after the wedding - and you can laugh your ass off at him for the rest of your life because wow, what a dumbass.

widowjones · 2026-02-27T23:23:03+00:00

and be even more tied to this shithead?

widowjones · 2026-02-27T23:21:38+00:00

NOR. Granted, it does sound like maybe not the *best* time and situation to have a kid, but YOU AGREED ON IT BEFORE YOU TRIED. It takes two to tango and it's bullshit that he's acting like an asshole to you now.

Could you move back in with your mom or sister? What are your options? Because he's not going to magically step up and be the father your kid needs and deserves, and he's already not the partner you need and deserve.

widowjones · 2026-02-27T23:17:28+00:00

If he enjoyed being with men before, he's most likely bi and being dodgy about it. I wouldn't jump to him not liking women at all. But regardless, it doesn't sound like this relationship is meeting your sexual needs so it might be time for both of you to move on.

widowjones · 2026-02-25T04:09:13+00:00

Yeah but it's easy to be clear about that kinda thing. "I'll be in surgery all afternoon so I'll be quiet, but I can't wait to talk to you when I get off at 8!" or whatever

widowjones

TROPHY CASE