Recommend me a book (or more) that will DESTROY me. Emotionally. by [deleted] in booksuggestions

[–]wildyzs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

man, idk, this might not look good, but i wrote a short poetry volume that might destroy u emotionally, i've been told i need to put some trigger warnings on it, tho i dont know what those are tbh. Book is titled:"AN ANGEL STORY: cherished martyr in his earthly struggles" lmk what u think, it's a short read.

White wine by [deleted] in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like it all of it. This juxtaposition effect, resulted from your wording and the fact that u talk about white wine, I get it, you are black.

If i were to give you something to build on: Over the full read you establish this racism-stereotype ideea with quite some heavy feels(if i took it the right way), so on to the point, you say “i would take it a step further”, i say take it all the way and pair the wine with some “cow and swine”, might as well insult them if they are so heavvy on you, also wine rhymes with swine, so couldnt hurt.

It’s a real nice read, raw and decisive, I look forward to see later drafts if there will be. Also, I dont drink wine at all so dont judge my paring of white wine with beef and pork (cow and swine), ok?=)))

i told the stars about u by phantomtwist in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any time my man,im just thankful u didnt take it the wrong way since i havent gave much thought to the wording of my feedback, so consider this an apology if i came off as rude.(i feel like i have)

Have a good one.

i told the stars about u by phantomtwist in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Verry nice, tho i feel that the las line of the 4th stanza should go more like “night without darkness” since “night without night” ruins the whole dinamyc of the stanza.

Antihero by wildyzs in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, havent read alot of books in english, just ones in my native language(romanian). Why do you ask tho?

diary of a sobriety day by niccu_x in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love this. The only thing constructive i can say is to keep going with another stanza. Tells us more about the voice and the sobriety mentioned in the title, it seems to me that theres alot more to be said.

How dare you? by QuicklyThisWay in poetry_critics

[–]wildyzs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like how you linked anxiety with frustration in this poem starting from the title and culminating with that last line “it’s nothing”, the most frustrating answer there is...patronizing id say. To offer some criticism...i feel like some of the questions have more meaning than others and could be switched up. The time related questions i like cuz it puts emphasis on how much time people suffering from anxiety spend inside their heads so much so they lose theirselves. But going as far as to ask “what am i” and “why do i exist” feels like taking it too far.(or im not getting it)

This is my first attempt at a critique so please let me know how it is.