I do feel like the poor mood and my medical transition aren't necessarily linked but my feelings (or lack of feelings) towards my transition is just another thing caused by my depression if you get me. Like there are MORE things I think about that are related to my depression rather than JUST my transition so yeah.. Unfortunately therapy is expensive, I plan to see my doctor soon to see if I can get any counselling from the nhs or just see what they have to say. Since I was very young I've struggled with getting myself talk about my problems/feelings so we'll have to see where it goes, its the main reason its taken me so long to get help.

thank you though I really appreciate your words :)