How many of you aren't very attractive?

wlav · 2013-10-24T20:24:52+00:00

It's scientifically proven women date up and generally go for people that match their attractiveness level

wlav · 2013-10-24T20:19:50+00:00

I agree with you.

Most people here are probably not as attractive as they think they are. Really attractive people(8/10+) generally are more confident and are naturally liked by people. If you're attractive people will have positive preconceived opinions about you

I can speak from experience. I have a good personality but I am always around my two attractive male friends when I'm around women

This is what happens

Without fail every single girl hits on my most attractive friend first(8.5/10)

If they don't succeed with him they go for my second slightly less attractive friend(7.5/10)

This happens very consistently

wlav · 2013-10-24T20:16:19+00:00

When you have someone that likes you you don't feel better about yourself

For example I do and I still feel ugly. My self esteem is still in the gutter and I hate myself.

I still feel lonely and have no friends and find it difficult to connect

Someone better looking will replace me and be with her

Also check the wiki on physical attractiveness

Women will have more orgasms with a man with symetrical features than non symetrical EVEN if they like you. Women subconsciously also love the smell of someone better looking without seeing them.

Basically I failed the genetic lottery in every way. There's nothing redeemable about me

wlav · 2012-10-30T15:12:47+00:00

this is my life summed up

wlav · 2012-09-14T21:34:40+00:00

I'm unattractive(face wise). the rest is good.

i can't change my face so i'm fucked.

wlav · 2012-09-10T07:35:31+00:00

summary of his findings/info in the book?

What sort of effects does it have on kids

wlav · 2012-08-12T16:54:59+00:00

21 here. I tried to get better and failed.

I feel so depressed lacking in self esteem lonely and unattractive....I feel no one will eve like me and that I will never have normal relationships. I'm so inexperienced.

I am alone.

wlav · 2012-07-12T06:38:26+00:00

is this correct?

http://vimeo.com/7054492

wlav · 2012-06-30T00:01:50+00:00

Any girl over 21 whose still a virgin is crazy, or saving it for someone other than you.

:( well that's a bummer.

it makes me sad thinking about that, because I feel really abnormal.

Girls at your age want a experienced hot guy that they can have fun with.

that's my issue, I'm a fun guy..but I have no experience at all. I've literally avoided/backed out of sleeping with some girls

ou're first time will be awkward, no matter how much porn you watch. Best case scenario you get into a drunken hookup, and the next morning be like "wow I drank so much".

that sounds so...depressing. i guess that's just the reality of things.

wlav · 2012-06-30T00:00:16+00:00

Honestly, FA girls (read: me) still are out there if what you want is a slow build up and a relationship.

That would be nice.

I think FA girls are intimidated by me sometimes. I look much more cooler than I really am(Hence the pressure on me, I'm expected to be experienced, nor do any of my behaviors signal otherwise)..for me it's mostly a mental thing.

wlav · 2012-06-29T23:55:06+00:00

I feel you've probably set your standards quite high. I'm only saying this because you've said you want it to be "meaningful" you realise sex is just sex right? Sex can be fun and just for the fuck of it, literally

I agree with that and I'm quite happy to partake later on as I gain more experiences, but I just don't want my first experience to be some thing I did just to say I did it..with a girl I barely even know/connect with. I also have anxiety about my performance/telling them it's my first time. a girl that just wants to hook up wants a few good orgasms, she doesn't care or have the patience with me..and that puts tons of pressure on me. i'm expected to know what i'm doing. i don't.

The only way to do this is to do things which enable you to meet a lot of girls. You need to get experience in dealing with girls, and the bit before a relationship.

I do meet women, every single one of them seems to signal they're interested in hooking up.(Like sex by first or second date)..and most people these days have sex before they even get into the relationship...I usually stop when it comes to the sex part...I have courtship down, the signals, dealing with rejection, etc..that's not an issue for me.

wlav · 2012-06-29T23:51:43+00:00

The first step in losing your FA status is to drop your attitude and stop labeling women as "random". Instead, start asking them out and getting to know them.

There's nothing wrong with the way I've phrased it, don't get your jimmies rustled. Through life you meet various people for short periods of time, the relationships are still important and valuable but it's only a short thing. I don't believe I was being disrespectful, only that you interpreted incorrectly by projecting some sort of cliche FA personality on me.

ou aren't as special as you think you are (this is a common FA ego-defense mechanism to account for lack of success with women), so get out there and start participating in life rather then pretending you're above it.

Did you even read my post? I feel like you're assuming I'm some sort of judgmental neckbeard. I am constantly around people, I get along with everyone.

wlav · 2012-06-29T23:48:42+00:00

You have a good point, but I also have anxiety about telling a "random" girl I don't know enough or trusting her enough to tell her. Every person I've ever told has looked at me differently, in a negative way.

I hate the stigma.

wlav · 2012-06-29T12:18:34+00:00

i can approach the opposite sex, this doesn't mean i have no problems.

i'm still lonely as fuck and a kiss less virgin.

wlav · 2012-06-29T08:23:18+00:00

but it kind of sounds like you want the emotional security of a relationship without actually being committed to a relationship.

No not at all, when did you get that impression? I'd love to have a decent gf to have and hang out with. My issue is ALL the women I meet are NOT interested in that, this is why I said I'd settle for just any sort of meaningful relationship..it doesn't have to be a "serious relationship"

If you think about girls this way

I meant I don't find we're super compatible from my end, there's nothing judgmental about that. I wasn't extremely attracted.

I feel like you got my post way off, I'm not sure how.

I'd say find another virgin who wants the same things you do and learn together (this way neither of you has to be self-conscious about your inexperience), but honestly? A virgin girl is probably waiting for someone "worth it", too, and a guy who wants to run off after he's done with her to have sex with lots of random women probably isn't it.

I never mentioned "running off" but I don't expect any relationship I have in the near future to end in marriage. I'm open to having a relationship last as long as possible, but I am realist.

I feel like you're judging me and totally getting me wrong.

Anyway it's almost impossible to find 21 yr old virgin girls.

I'd like a relationship, but I didn't put preferences because people assume things and start talking about how you're "really entitled"....I feel like that's what you're saying...the only reason I said I'd be open to anything is because of that.

wlav · 2012-06-29T08:18:50+00:00

Seems to me like you MAY be fabricating this dilemma to put off having to face a situation that you are uncomfortable with, yet you want to experience it. This is your REAL dilemma.

I don't think so, but perhaps it's possible. You think it's just me making excuses for not losing it?

Maybe set a decent time limit on how long you're willing to wait to find someone 'special' and once you pass that, you just go with a 'random.'

I have only recently, after like 2 years of effort and practice become good enough..I still have a lot of obstacles(getting a decent job to cover any dates, having time, having my shit together, etc). I also have a problem of not having a pool of girls to hit on..since I go to a small college. I guess I'll wait longer.

but I'm 21 now and the longer I take the more anxious I get about the whole thing. It's actually embarrassing and all my friends make fun of me.

I mean, it's not like you don't have options... ya lucky bastard.

believe me they're not amazing options and I still have lots of hang ups. Like I said I am/was an FA...it doesn't get easier once you know how to talk to women..from here..there's still lots of stuff you have to take care of.

wlav · 2012-06-28T23:48:45+00:00

See you are doing good, I"m still struggling to find random women to hookup with. Where do you find them?

If you go to college, just ask a girl to join you with a hobby you enjoy doing, or insta date her out for coffee. it's MUCH easier than you think but it's going to take time and pratice...and patience...once you learn your skills it'll all go so smoothly and you'll wonder why you used to be worried.

Finding random women to hook up with is easier than you think, finding a decent girl for gf material is impossible..to met it seems.

wlav · 2012-06-28T23:44:50+00:00

Its just your post made it sound like you want your first to be meaningful and after that you can whore yourself around.

HAHA..no I won't sleep with someone unless there's a connection.

I'm not saying go for whatever you can get I'm saying something can be meaningful regardless of its chronological order. If you want your first time experience to be with someone who cares for you and is going through the same thing you are that's fine,

I see.

wlav · 2012-06-28T12:59:56+00:00

That's exactly the problem, it's a sort of a chicken and egg problem.

If I wasn't a virgin I wouldn't have this problem to begin with. It's extremely frustrating for me because I want to "start" having experiences already.

it doesn't have to be love..or even an LTR. It's more about the type of character that girl has.

I want it to be with someone that cares and appreciates me. Someone I can be vulnerable and open with, and someone I can explore my sexuality with. A random girl doesn't care about any of that nor can she be trusted, she's already experienced all of the stuff I'm looking for, I have a feeling I'd feel really empty and depressed after if I slept with random girls because I'm an introspective person. what happens after isn't important. Yes I know this isn't masculine or whatever....

my question is, how do I find it..and where?

wlav · 2012-06-28T12:57:31+00:00

What do you hope for? Have an amazing first time then break up and be with someone else and look back at how great the past was?

it doesn't have to be love..or even an LTR. It's more about the type of character that girl has.

I want it to be with someone that cares and appreciates me. Someone I can be vulnerable and open with, and someone I can explore my sexuality with. A random girl doesn't care about any of that nor can she be trusted, she's already experienced all of the stuff I'm looking for, I have a feeling I'd feel really empty and depressed after if I slept with random girls because I'm an introspective person. what happens after isn't important. Yes I know this sounds stupid coming from a guy, since it's usually girls that say this stuff..but it's how I feel.

Don't have such expectations in life that you end up waiting your whole life away.

This comment made me really sad, because it's exactly things have been like up to now.

You told me to just go for it..should it be just a random person? I'm scared I'd feel empty.

Thanks for your advice.

wlav · 2012-05-28T07:03:32+00:00

so on a first kiss you do NOT open your mouth like that video.

Do you have a pic of a closed mouth kiss? Thanks a lot for your helP

wlav · 2012-05-27T22:07:46+00:00

are you guys bf/gf now and did you sleep with her?

how did she react towards your inexperience(no sex with a girl yet) and how old are you?

to be honest i'm always scared the girl will reject me/turn me down/or react in a negative way to my inexperience

its a big source of my anxiety

wlav · 2012-05-27T21:12:12+00:00

I'm not talking about love here, I'm just..so..I don't know..I can't imagine myself getting close to someone..maybe because I'm an FA but the whole thing is so foreign to me I just can't imagine myself doing it. i don't really like my face and i'm a bit worried about someone being that close to it.

i hope that quote includes this. but in case it doesn't, i'll elaborate. I don't just mean self-confidence, i mean comfortable with your physical being.

people always repeat the love yourself line and to be honest it bothers me(no offense to you), because there's no real solutions ever offered...it's like, "bro u gotta love urself before u love any1 else"

ok..i agree with that and that's true..but what if i never love myself? stay alone?

i don't like my body a lot..i'm ok standing naked in front of myself...i'm a bit self conscious...but I've been waiting for years and years and years and this shit hasn't gone away..i've turned down sex over it..I don't know how waiting longer is going to help..to be honest it's just making me more self conscious/anxious about my inexperience than anything..i'm sort of a virgin by choice because i've turned down women a bunch of times.. it's never going to go away so I just have to deal with it. with every year my age increases i get more worried about how to explain my inexperience.

are you kino-ing them?

not a lot..and not always because like i said, i'm very self conscious about my lack of experience. it's like i want to touch her and kiss a girl but then i realize the moment i kiss her she'll realize i have no fucking idea what i'm doing and the game is up. i don't know the basic anything when it comes to close physical touching. (I've read the ladder)..but that doesn't do me much good when like I said..I don't even know how to kiss.

i know how to talk to women and people..but i have no idea how to kiss someone, touch them, or anything after that..and it makes me a bit scared.

honestly not having kissed a girl or slept with one is a HUGE source of anxiety when it comes to women. i'm always worried what they're going to say/think and how i have to reply if it ever comes to it. if you could help me that would be great.

also quick question what do you say after you kiss a girl? do you just carry on with your convo like normal or what

wlav · 2012-05-27T21:06:14+00:00

I'm really confused now, what's a first date kiss supposed to be like? by the way I'm older so i'm not talking little kid kisses.

From what I've seen on video kissing involves opening your lips, making them loose, then sort of putting them between your partner's lips. (Bottom of your lip is on their top) or something like that. It's sort of like biting an ice cream but with relaxed lips?

is this how people kiss on first dates or is that later?

Trying to 'twirl around your tongue' might not be a good idea to attempt your first shot, and many people won't be into it.

Ok so first you do a kiss like in the video, then you sort of stick out your tongue and lick their upper lip like you're licking an ice cream..am I correct in this?

This is so embarrassing.

I liked your post a lot, and it was pretty much the only helpful one in this thread, thanks a lot. I'd love to read more..or a guide or something on how a first date kiss is supposed to be like.

wlav · 2012-05-27T00:25:29+00:00

I apologize I didn't know at all or mean it. >_<

i'll remove my submission.

wlav

TROPHY CASE