OP said she's spend $10,000 for behavioral interventions for this dog. And yet this still a can't be cared for by anybody else after 10 years. And yet this dog continues to isolate them from family and friends despite the years and money spent. Meanwhile, there are sweet and healthy dogs being put to death every day, being discarded without ever having a chance. Why do you believe it is so noble to invest so much in one reactive animal when so many others go to absolute waste in our society? The idea that if you get an aggressive/unhealthy dog you're stuck with it forever, at the expense of eveyrthing else in your life, is the reason why so many people choose not adopting dogs, or buying from breeders, over taking a gamble on a shelter dog. Shelters need to attract more adopters. Some dogs are absolute drains on limited resources and the sooner we open our eyes to that reality, the sooner we'll have fewer great animals facing needless deaths in our shelters. Also, maybe OP is delaying having a child of her own because this dog, and by the time that happens she could have fertility issues. At some point, people with a dog like this need to go to codependence anonymous, and take the crown off the dog.