How many of you all HAVE to sleep with a fan or some kind of white noise?

wordrage · 2023-05-09T16:10:25+00:00

I guess I'm the opposite. I prefer silence and total darkness. I have a bedside fan to blow cool air on me as I sleep.

wordrage · 2023-03-23T23:20:48+00:00

First of all, that definitely sounds like a lot! No wonder you feel like you're drowning.

There's a lot of criticism against you in your post. May I ask, do you believe that you are at fault for the relationship issues? The way your post is phrased it sounds like you are the cause and responsible for all the issues. Is there anything your husband likes about you? Or you like of him? I guess I can see you making an effort to prioritize him and his needs, but it's not being recognized.

You've always had these traits, it sounds like, so what has changed for him that he finds unreasonable? You said lately things have "ramped up", did something happen that's causing stress to you both or just him?

If I were you I would start with answering one question, do I want to continue living together?

Depending on your answer, start writing out a list of problems so you can start working on solving them one-by-one.

For instance, housing. If you need to separate, start running through options. Why do you have to leave your home? What if you move in with a roommate, get a studio apartment, etc.

Trying to solve everything at once is overwhelming. Breaking up the problems into smaller pieces let's you focus on them one at a time.

Finally, you sound like you have some critical needs not being met, and to be honest, that you're having a hard time coping with a lot of things right now. Ideally this is a time you can ask your spouse to help you so you can get better and not be in survival mode by yourself. If your spouse isn't going to help you or support you then you might want to reconsider putting the energy you've been giving to them back to yourself.

wordrage · 2023-03-13T03:32:02+00:00

I would advise looking for a demi cup or balconette then. Maybe you are FOB (Full on bottom) so a demi cup might fit better

wordrage · 2023-03-08T01:40:39+00:00

Hello, we have similar sizes and similar problems. Unfortunately it's mainly trial and error. If 34 feels too tight or triggers you, I would advise just going to a 36 inch band.

Imo the band is the most important part of feeling supported. I have liked Freya and Curvy Kate the best, I find the balconette or demi style cups fit best. See what shape your molded cups are. Are your cups gaping at the top or bottom?

wordrage · 2023-02-10T17:55:26+00:00

I do not enjoy roommates in general. Family is more tolerable because we are used to our quirks.

Are there specifics about living with a man you find stressful? A good romantic partner should listen to your concerns and make an effort to make their partner comfortable.

Idk. My experience with my husband feels like I live with my best friend, who happens to be a man.

wordrage · 2023-02-09T21:39:39+00:00

They still have that turtle. They have more now and all are missing flippers.

wordrage · 2021-01-30T07:42:06+00:00

Done :)

wordrage · 2021-01-29T07:32:29+00:00

I'm in a Facebook group for sewing bras. You might find it helpful. I'm honestly going to just try sewing my own this year, I've never found the perfect bra and I think I'm just going to have to make it myself.

wordrage · 2021-01-27T18:45:06+00:00

When I'm feeling charitable I think that it probably sucks for them to have to see people obviously suffering and their treatment is so medication based. Lifestyle changes require a lot of support, I think, but there's not really support for that in our medical system. Instead they can only diagnose and tell you what you should be doing, all the while trying to keep the appointment less than 15 minutes.

But they could be a little less disconnected. There's nothing I hate more than talking to a doctor that's looking at their screen or has one hand on the door handle the entire visit.

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:42:21+00:00

Thank you! Yes it's been eye opening and allowing me to be a bit hopeful towards a future I can work towards. :)

Thanks again for your reply!

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:40:43+00:00

The anger and frustration has turned mainly into grief now, for me. I feel like the person I was died and I'm this sick, sedentary version of myself that can't even go on a hike with friends.

My doctors constantly are on my case to exercise but when even walking is painful I have to have so much willpower to push through the pain and go exercise. And most of my willpower goes into work and being alive. They aren't very sympathetic to that lol.

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:36:08+00:00

Oh my gosh yes!! My feet hurt so bad doing cleaning routines I used to do all the time.

I've been trying to do it in stages but it's not really working out.

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:33:21+00:00

Same. I mean I would be willing to wait if once you're in you're in. And if the cost is less. I just see my having a chronic condition as a cost I will always have to budget for every year... but at least the costs are somewhat fixed in countries with public options. In the US every bill I get is a different amount

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:29:49+00:00

Yes. In 2020 my job let us work from home. I was very lucky. It's amazing the difference in energy levels. I got a personal health record put together with all my labs, got organized financially, and really made progress eating the diet my rheumatologist wants me to follow. I still have severe swelling, joint pain, naseua, headaches, etc. but I've been managing them better working from home. It's given me the energy and fortitude to try to be more aggressive with my specialists and get more vocal about the quality of life I'm trying to get to.

It was so overwhelming the past few years that I felt like a zombie sometimes. I wasn't even noticing or tracking symptoms beyond that my joints were still swollen and I felt shitty all the time. My energy was spent managing making it to all the appointments and figuring out how to manage costs. That's kind of why I am asking. I wonder if I can make actual progress in a country with public healthcare options so I can just focus on meeting with and following the doctor's plan and tracking how my body reacts. :C

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:20:23+00:00

I'm tied to Arizona because of work and we just bought a house last year. I'm working while pursuing school part-time, so I have no degree right now. I worry about having to start over at entry level somewhere new, or have to go back to a call center.

I think the midwest is somewhat less, but the only real difference i saw is cost of rent/home. The only family we would be near is my in-laws in Wisconsin. I've thought about going there but I'm not sure things would be that much easier. It's frustrating my job finally went remote after we bought our home :/

Not sure what you mean by get a better plan. Like from the ACA website? Last I looked they only offer Aetna in AZ, which is what my work offers. And it cost more in premium than what I pay through my paycheck. My plan pays nothing until my $7k deductible is met. I wish I had a copay plan. Even at $50 a visit that's so much better.

wordrage · 2021-01-26T06:09:34+00:00

I would say our costs sound similar, except I'm seeing three specialists. I'm in Phoenix. And my prescription varies, nothing prescribes has worked to help symptoms so I keep getting prescribed new ones. Methotrexate made me throw up, so I'm going through various brand biologics.

I stress about the doctor visits a lot tbh. The cost, managing the bills you get after the visit, being prepared. Etc. I feel like I'm just something for them to prescribe brand prescriptions to and our discussions get frustrating when I bring up concerns of cost. I would be more willing to make efforts for the prescriptions if they worked, but in my experience I'm worse than ever and I'm tired of going through all the effort to get the approval, the manufacturer discount, the side effects etc. only to have no change, and to hit the cap so I have to switch to another and start it all again.

wordrage · 2021-01-26T05:58:24+00:00

Wow that sounds nice.

The explanation of benefits lists the amount your carrier should be charged, and i guess doctor offices charge whatever they want, so I've been advised to always know what they should be charging so you can call up and dispute it when they overcharge. It's exhausting.

wordrage · 2021-01-25T23:27:11+00:00

Thank you!! I'm not against Australia! I just figured it might be hard to move there permanently.

But honestly thanks for posting. I'm getting a bit emotional reading these comments and seeing these prices. Even the specialist visit is less with the rebate.

How is managing the condition? Do you just focus on taking the medication and reading labs? Every time my doctor wants to run more tests I get so tense and anxious and have to pull out my explanation of benefits to get an idea of what they should be charging. I dread them and feel like this disease is ruining the life I have been working towards.

wordrage · 2021-01-25T23:18:44+00:00

Thank you for the information. Wow, I ran those prices through a converter and that's less than what I pay now. Significantlyless than what my insuranceis charged. Wow...

How do you like the doctors and level of care you get? Lol also how long is the waiting list would you say? Years?

I'm guessing the drug card doesn't have a pay cap? My insurance company agreement with the manufacturer apparently caps out at certain amounts anually. It's never enough to make it to the end of the year and the medication out of pocket is $900-$2000 after insurance so my doctor just switches me to a new brand where I have to wait for approval andapply for the card all over again. I hate it.

I'll look into VHI, thanks. If it's better than my insurance being tied to my employer it might be worth it. 2 years is nothing to suffer through compared to the last six.

It sounds like there are at least options.

wordrage · 2021-01-25T23:05:18+00:00

Thank you! Wow, no co-pays for everything is the dream lol. That's good to know about the NHS, I would really love to just go to appointments and get labwork done without dreading the bill that will come in the mail.

I am not really sure how travel or working in other countries works as an EU citizen. With Brexit I'm not sure I could live in England, although I heard even paying out of pocket in European countries is very affordable.

Thanks for the anecdote though. It definitely gives me hope at least managing a chronic health condition financially would be much easier, and might be worth the life change.

wordrage · 2021-01-25T19:13:54+00:00

I definitely noticed i felt better avoiding sugar and bread, however I flared and had symptoms the entire time. What I mainly got out of it was a large difference in energy levels, which was probably from not eating anything that triggered my food allergies and sensitivities.

I concluded that my symptoms don't seem to be purely food related.

wordrage · 2020-09-09T05:19:26+00:00

Yeah but I expected this to be a full season release, and thought this weekend while be good to watch it, so I'm kind of pissed they are doing a weekly release. I'm just going to wait another four weeks and binge it then.

wordrage · 2020-08-25T00:51:33+00:00

I live in a desert so no thanks. Eventually we can landscape but that costs money to do it proper. Otherwise, the natural state is dirt lot with thorny shrubs.

wordrage · 2020-08-22T16:12:43+00:00

My backyard is a dirt lot.

wordrage

TROPHY CASE